To beaten Douglas; and the earls of Athol, It is a conquest for a prince to boast of. Fal. Marry, then, sweet wag, when thou art king, let not us, that are squires of the night's body, be called thieves of the day's beauty; let us beDiana's foresters, gentlemen of the shade, minions of the moon: And let men say, we be men of good government: being govern'd as the sea is, K. Hen. Yea, there thou mak'st me sad, and by our noble and chaste mistress the moon, under mak'st me sin In envy that my lord Northumberland A son who is the theme of honour's tongue; Of my young Harry. O, that it could be prov'd, COZ, Of this young Percy's pride? the prisoners, Malevolent to you in all aspects; K. Hen. But I have sent for him to answer this; Cousin, on Wednesday next our council we whose countenance we--steal. P. Hen. Thou say'st well; and it holds well too: for the fortune of us, that are the moon's men, doth ebb and flow like the sea; being governed as the sea is, by the moon. As, for proof, now: A purse of gold most resolutely snatch'd on Monday night, and most dissolutely spent on Tuesday morning; got with swearing-lay by 4 and spent with crying-bring in:5 now, in as low an ebb as the foot of the ladder; and, by and by, in as high a flow as the ridge of the gallows. Fal. By the Lord, thou say'st true, lad. And is not my hostess of the tavern a most sweet wench? P. Hen. As the honey of Hybla, my old lad of the castle. And is not a buff jerkin a most sweet robe of durance ?6 Fal. How now, how now, mad wag? what, in thy quips, and thy quiddities? what a plague have I to do with a buff jerkin? P. Hen. Why, what a pox have I to do with my hostess of the tavern? Fal. Well, thou hast called her to a reckoning, many a time and oft. P. Hen. Did I ever call for thee to pay thy part? Fal. No; I'll give thee thy due, thou hast paid all there. P. Hen. Yea, and elsewhere, so far as my coin would stretch; and, where it would not, I have used my credit. Fal. Yea, and so used it, that were it not here apparent that thou art heir apparent,-But, I pr'ythee, sweet wag, shall there be gallows stand[Exeunting in England when thou art king? and resolu tion thus fobbed as it is, with the rusty curb of old father antic the law? Do not thou, when thou art king, hang a thief. SCENE II-The same. Another room in the palace. Enter Henry Prince of Wales, and Falstaff. Fal. Now, Hal, what time of day is it, lad? P. Hen. Thou art so fat-witted, with drinking of old sack, and unbuttoning thee after supper, and sleeping upon benches after noon, that thou hast forgotten to demand that truly which thou would'st truly know. What a devil hast thou to do with the time of the day? unless hours were cups of sack, and minutes capons, and clocks the tongues of bawds, and dials the signs of leaping-houses, and the blessed sun himself a fair hot wench in flame-colour'd taffata; I see no reason, why thou should'st be so superfluous to demand the time of the day. Fal. Indeed, you come near me, now, Hal: for we, that take purses, go by the moon and seven stars; and not by Phoebus,-he, that wandering knight so fair. And, I pray thee, sweet wag, when thou art king,-as, God save thy grace (majesty, I should say; for grace thou wilt have none,) P. Hen. What, none? Fal. No, by my troth; not so much as will serve to be prologue to an egg and butter. P. Hen. Well, how then? come, roundly, roundly. (1) Points. (2) Trim, as birds clean their feathers. (3) Favourites. (4) Stand still. (5) More wine. (6) The dress of sheriff's' officers. P. Hen. No; thou shalt. Fal. Shall I? Orare! By the lord I'll be a brave judge. P. Hen. Thou judgest false already; I mean, thou shalt have the hanging of the thieves, and so become a rare hangman. Fal. Well, Hal, well; and in some sort it jumps with my humour, as well as waiting in the court, I can tell you. P. Hen. For obtaining of suits? Fal. Yea, for obtaining of suits: whereof the hangman hath no lean wardrobe. 'Sblood, I am as melancholy as a gib? cat, or a lugged bear. P. Hen. Ór an old lion; or a lover's lute. Fal. Thou hast the most unsavory similes; and art, indeed, the most comparative, rascalliest,sweet young prince,-But, Hal, I pr'ythee, trouble me no more with vanity. I would to God, thou and I knew where a commodity of good names were to be bought: An old lord of the council rated me the other day in the street about you, sir; but I marked him not: and yet he talked very wisely; but I regarded him not: and yet he talked wisely, and in the street too. (7) Gib cat, should be lib cat,-a Scotch term at this day for a gelded cat. (8) Croak of a frog. P. Hen. Thou didst well; for wisdom cries out in the streets, and no man regards it. Fal. O thou hast damnable iteration and art, indeed, able to corrupt a saint. Thou hast done much harm upon me, Hal,--God forgive thee for it! Before I knew thee, Hal, I knew nothing; and now am I, if a man should speak truly, little better than one of the wicked. I must give over this life, and I will give it over; by the Lord, an I do not, I am a villain; I'll be damned for never a king's son in Christendom. P. Hen. Where shall we take a purse to-morrow, Jack? Fal. Well, may'st thou have the spirit of persuasion, and he the ears of profiting, that what thou speakest may move, and what he hears may be believed, that the true prince may (for recreation sake) prove a false thief; for the poor abuses of the time want countenance. Farewell: You shall find me in Eastcheap. P. Hen. Farewell, thou latter spring! Farewell, All-hallown summer!? [Exit Falstaff Poins. Now, my good sweet honey lord, ride with us to-morrow; I have a jest to execute, that I cannot manage alone. Falstaff, Bardolph, Peto, and Gadshill, shall rob those men that we have al Fal. Where thou wilt, lad, I'll make one; an Iready way-laid: yourself, and I, will not be there: do not, call me villain, and baffle2 me. P. Hen. I see a good amendment of life in thee; from praying, to purse-taking. Enter Poins, at a distance. and when they have the booty, if you and I do not rob them, cut this head from my shoulders. P. Hen. But how shall we part with them in setting forth? Poins. Why, we will set forth before or after Fal. Why, Hal, 'tis my vocation, Hal; 'tis no them, and appoint them a place of meeting, wheresin for a man to labour in his vocation. Poins!-in it is at our pleasure to fail; and then will they Now shall we know if Gadshill have set a match.3 adventure upon the exploit themselves: which they O, if men were to be saved by merit, what hole in shall have no sooner achieved, but we'll set upon hell were hot enough for him? This is the most them. omnipotent villain, that ever cried, Stand, to a true4 man. P. Hen. Good morrow, Ned. P. Hen. Ay, but, 'tis like, that they will know us, , by our horses, by our habits, and by every other appointment, to be ourselves. Poins. Good morrow, sweet Hal.-What says Poins Tut! our horses they shall not see, I'll monsieur Remorse? What says sir John Sack-tie them in the wood; our visors we will change, and-Sugar? Jack, how agrees the devil and thee after we leave them; and, sirrah, I have cases of about thy soul, that thou soldest him on Good-friday ||buckram for the nonce, to immask our noted outlast, for a cup of Madeira, and a cold capon's leg? ward garments. P. Hen. Sir John stands to his word, the devil shall have his bargain: for he was never yet a breaker of proverbs, he will give the devil his due. Poins. Then art thou damn'd for keeping thy word with the devil. P. Hen. Else he had been damned for cozening the devil. Poins. But, my lads, my lads, to-morrow morning, by four o'clock, early at Gadshill: There are pilgrims going to Canterbury with rich offerings, and traders riding to London with fat purses: I have visors for you all, you have horses for your selves; Gadshill lies to-night in Rochester; I have bespoke supper to-morrow night in Eastcheap; we may do it as secure as sleep: If you will go, I will stuff your purses full of crowns; if you will not, tarry at home, and be hanged. Fal. Hear me, Yedward; if I tarry at home, and go not, I'll hang you for going. Poins. You will, chops? Fal. Hal, wilt thou make one? P. Hen. Who, I rob? I a thief? not I, by my faith. Fal. There's neither honesty, manhood, nor good fellowship in thee, nor thou camest not of the blood royal, if thou darest not stand for ten shillings.6 P. Hen. Well, then, once in my days I'll be a mad-cap. Fal. Why, that's well said. P. Hen. Well, come what will, I'll tarry at home. Fal. By the Lord, I'll be a traitor then, when thou art king. P. Hen. I care not. P. Hen. But, I doubt, they will be too hard for us. Poins. Well, for two of them, I know them to be as true-bred cowards as ever turned back; and for the third, if he fight longer than he sees reason, I'll forswear arms. The virtue of this jest will be, the incomprehensible lies that this same fat rogue will tell us, when we meet at supper: how thirty, at least, he fought with; what wards, what blows, what extremities he endured; and, in the reproof" of this, lies the jest. P. Hen. Well, I'll go with thee: provide us all things necessary, and meet me to-morrow night in Eastcheap, there I'll sup. Farewell. Poins. Farewell, my lord. [Exit Poins. P. Hen. I know you all, and will a while uphold The unyok'd humour of your idleness: Yet herein will I imitate the sun; Who doth permit the base contagious clouds To smother up his beauty from the world, That, when he please again to be himself, Being wanted, he may be more wonder'd at, By breaking through the foul and ugly mists Of vapours, that did seem to strangle him. If all the year were playing holidays, To sport would be as tedious as to work; But, when they seldom come, they wish'd-for come, And nothing pleaseth but rare accidents. So, when this loose behaviour I throw off, And pay the debt I never promised, By how much better than my word I am, By so much shall I falsify men's hopes;10 And, like bright metal on a sullen ground, My reformation, glittering o'er my fault, Shall show more goodly, and attract more eyes, Than that which hath no foil to set it off. I'll so offend, to make offence a skill: Redeeming time, when men think least I will. [Ex. (7) Fine weather at All-hallown-tide (i. e. All Saints, Nov. 1st) is called an All-hallown summer (8) Occasion. (9) Confutation. (10) Expectations. (11) Dull. SCENE III-The same. Another room in the palace. Enter King Henry, Northumberland, Worcester, Hotspur, Sir Walter Blunt, and others. K. Hen. My blood hath been too cold and temperate, Unapt to stir at these indignities, And you have found me; for, accordingly, serves The scourge of greatness to be used on it; North. My lord, Out of the bowels of the harmless earth, Whatever Harry Percy then had said, K. Hen. Why, yet he doth deny his prisoners; That we, at our own charge, shall ransom straight K. Hen. Worcester, get thee gone, for I see His brother-in-law, the foolish Mortimer; danger And disobedience in thine eye: O, sir, You were about to speak. Hot. My liege, I did deny no prisoners. And 'twixt his finger and his thumb he held He call'd them-untaught knaves, unmannerly, Betwixt the wind and his nobility. With many holiday and lady terms He question'd me; among the rest demanded My prisoners, in your majesty's behalf. I then, all smarting, with my wounds being cold, He should, or he should not ;-for he made me mad, And telling me, the sovereign'st thing on earth And that it was great pity, so it was, That villanous salt-petre should be digg'd Who, on my soul, hath wilfully betray'd Hot. Revolted Mortimer! He never did fall off, my sovereign liege, He did confound the best part of an hour Upon agreement, of swift Severn's flood; Then let him not be slander'd with revolt. K. Hen. Thou dost belie him, Percy, thou dost belie him, He never did encounter with Glendower; I tell thee, He durst as well have met the devil alone, Or you [Exeunt King Henry, Blunt, and train. Hot. And if the devil come and roar for them, I will not send them :-I will after straight, (5) Parrot. (6) Pain. (7) Brave. (9) Expend. (11) Curled. And tell him so; for I will ease my heart, Although it be with hazard of my head. And now I will unclasp a secret book, And to your quick-conceiving discontents North. What, drunk with choler? stay, and I'll read you matter deep and dangerous; pause a while; Here comes your uncle. Re-enter Worcester. Hot. Speak of Mortimer? Zounds, I will speak of him; and let my soul Want mercy, if I do not join with him: Yea, on his part, I'll empty all these veins, And shed my dear blood drop by drop i'the dust, But I will lift the down-trod Mortimer As high i'the air as this unthankful king, As this ingratel and canker'd Bolingbroke. North. Brother, the king hath made your nephew mad. [To Worcester. Wor. Who struck this heat up, after I was gone? Hot. He will, forsooth, have all my prisoners; And when I urg'd the ransom once again Of my wife's brother, then his cheek look'd pale; And on my face he turn'd an eye of death, Trembling even at the name of Mortimer. Wor. I cannot blame him: was he not proclaim'd, By Richard that dead is, the next of blood? North. He was; I heard the proclamation: From whence he, intercepted, did return Live scandaliz'd, and foully spoken of. Hot. But, soft, I pray you: Did king Richard then Proclaim my brother Edmund Mortimer North. The cords, the ladder, or the hangman rather?— (1) Ungrateful. (3) Disdainful Peace, cousin, say no more: (6) Shapes created by his imagination. As full of peril, and advent'rous spirit, Hot. If he fall in, good night :-or sink or swim: North. Imagination of some great exploit Drives him beyond the bounds of patience. Hot. By heaven, methinks, it were an easy leap, To pluck bright honour from the pale-fac'd moon: Or dive into the bottom of the deep, Where fathom-line could never touch the ground, And pluck up drowned honour by the locks; So he, that doth redeem her thence, might wear, Without corrival,4 all her dignities: But out upon this half-fac'd fellowship 5 Wor. He apprehends a world of figures here. But not the form of what he should attend.Good cousin, give me audience for a while. Hot. I cry you mercy. Wor. Those same noble Scots, That are your prisoners,- Hot. Nay, I will; that's flat :- I'll have a starling shall be taught to speak Wor. Cousin, a word. Hear you, Hot. All studies here I solemnly defy,7 But that I think his father loves him not, Wor. Farewell, kinsman! I will talk to you, When you are better temper❜d to attend. North. Why, what a wasp-stung and impatient fool Art thou, to break into this woman's mood;9 with rods. Why, what a candy1 deal of courtesy This fawning greyhound then did proffer me! Good uncle, tell your tale, for I have done. Hot. I'll be hanged: Charles' wain is over the new chimney, and yet our horse not packed. What, ostler! Ost. [Within.] Anon, anon. 1 Car. I pr'ythee, Tom, beat Cut's saddle, put a few flocks in the point; the poor jade is wrung in the withers out of all cess.6 Enter another Carrier. 2 Car. Pease and beans are as dank? here as a dog, and that is the next way to give poor jades the bots :8 this house is turned upside down, since Robin ostler died. 1 Car. Poor fellow! never joyed since the price of oats rose; it was the death of him. 2 Car. I think, this be the most villanous house [To Northumberland.in all London road for fleas : I am stung like a tench.9 Your son in Scotland being thus employ'd,— Hot. Of York, is't not? Wor. True; who bears hard His brother's death at Bristol, the lord Scroop. As what I think might be, but what I know Hot. I smell it; upon my life, it will do well. Hot. Why, it cannot choose but be a noble plot : And then the power of Scotland, and of York,To join with Mortimer, ha? Wor. And so they shall. Hot. In faith, it is exceedingly well aim'd. Wor. And 'tis no little reason bids us speed, To save our heads by raising of a head:3 For, bear ourselves as even as we can, The king will always think him in our debt; And think we think ourselves unsatisfied, Till he hath found a time to pay us home. And see already, how he doth begin To make us strangers to his looks of love. Hot. He does, he does; we'll be reveng'd on him. Wor. Cousin, farewell :-No further go in this, Than I by letters shall direct your course. When time is ripe (which will be suddenly,) I'll steal to Glendower, and lord Mortimer; Where you and Douglas, and our powers at once (As I will fashion it,) shall happily meet, To bear our fortunes in our own strong arms, Which now we hold at much uncertainty. North. Farewell, good brother: we shall thrive, I trust. Hot. Uncle, adieu:-O, let the hours be short, Till fields, and blows, and groans, applaud our sport! [Exeunt. 1 Car. Like a tench? by the mass, there is ne'er a king in Christendom could be better bit than I have been since the first cock. 2 Car. Why, they will allow us ne'er a jorden, and then we leak in your chimney; and your chamber-lie breeds fleas like a loach.10 1 Car. What, ostler! come away and be hanged, come away. 2 Car. I have a gammon of bacon, and two razes of ginger, to be delivered as far as Charing-cross. 1 Car. 'Odsbody! the turkeys in my pannier are quite starved.-What, ostler!-A plague on thee! hast thou never an eye in thy head? canst not hear? An 'twere not as good a deed as drink, to break the pate of thee, I am a very villain.Come, and be hanged:-Hast no faith in thee? Enter Gadshill. Gads. Good morrow, carriers. What's o'clock ? 1 Car. I think it be two o'clock. Gads. I pr'ythee, lend me thy lantern, to see my gelding in the stable. 1 Car. Nay, soft, I pray ye; I know a trick worth two of that, i'faith. Gads. I pr'ythee, lend me thine. 2 Car. Ay, when? canst tell?-Lend me thy lantern, quoth-a?-marry, I'll see thee hanged first. Gads. Sirrah carrier, what time do you mean to come to London? 2 Car. Time enough to go to bed with a candle, I warrant thee.-Come, neighbour Mugs, we'll call up the gentlemen; they will along with company, for they have great charge. [Exe. Carriers. Gads. What, ho! chamberlain! Cham. Within.] At hand, quoth pick-purse. Gads. That's even as fair as-at hand, quoth the chamberlain: for thou variest no more from picking of purses, than giving direction doth from labouring; thou lay'st the plot how. |