ALL. Have with you to see this monster.

SCENE III.

A room in FORD's house.

[Exeunt.

Enter MISTRESS FORD and MISTRESS PAGE.

MRS. FORD. What, John! What, Robert! MRS. PAGE. Quickly, quickly! Is the buckbasket

MRS. FORD. I warrant. What, Robin, I say!
Enter Servants with a basket.

MRS. PAGE. Come, come, come.

MRS. FORD. Here, set it down.

MRS. PAGE. Give your men the charge; we must be brief.

:

MRS. FORD. Marry, as I told you before, John and Robert, be ready here hard by in the brewhouse and when I suddenly call you, come forth, and without any pause or staggering take this basket on your shoulders: that done, trudge with it in all haste, and carry it among the whitsters in Datchet-mead, and there empty it in the muddy ditch close by the Thames side.

MRS. PAGE. You will do it?

MRS. FORD. I ha' told them over and over; they lack no direction. Be gone, and come when you are called. [Exeunt Servants.

MRS. PAGE. Here comes little Robin.

Enter ROBIN.

MRS. FORD. How now, my eyas-musket! what

news with you?

ROB. My master, Sir John, is come in at your backdoor, Mistress Ford, and requests your company. MRS. PAGE. You little Jack-a-Lent, have you been true to us?

ROB. Ay, I'll be sworn. My master knows not of your being here and hath threatened to put me into everlasting liberty if I tell you of it; for he swears he'll turn me away.

MRS. PAGE. Thou 'rt a good boy: this secrecy of thine shall be a tailor to thee and shall make thee a new doublet and hose. I'll go hide me. Go tell thy master I am Mistress Page, remember

MRS. FORD. Do so. alone. [Exit ROBIN.] you your cue.

MRS. PAGE. I warrant thee; if I do not act it, hiss me.

[Exit.

MRS. FORD. Go to, then: we'll use this unwholesome humidity, this gross watery pumpion; we'll teach him to know turtles from jays.

Enter FALSTAFF.

FAL. Have I caught thee, my heavenly jewel? Why, now let me die, for I have lived long enough: this is the period of my ambition: Othis blessed hour! MRS. FORD. O sweet Sir John!

FAL. Mistress Ford, I cannot cog, I cannot prate, Mistress Ford. Now shall I sin in my wish: I would thy husband were dead: I'll speak it before the best lord; I would make thee my lady.

MRS. FORD. I your lady, Sir John! alas, I should be a pitiful lady!

FAL. Let the court of France show me such another. I see how thine eye would emulate the diamond: thou hast the right arched beauty of the brow that becomes the ship-tire, the tirevaliant, or any tire of Venetian admittance.

MRS. FORD. A plain kerchief, Sir John: my brows become nothing else; nor that well neither.

FAL. By the Lord, thou art a traitor to say so: thou wouldst make an absolute courtier; and the firm fixture of thy foot would give an excellent motion to thy gait in a semi-circled farthingale. I see what thou wert, if Fortune thy foe were not, Nature thy friend. Come, thou canst not hide it.

MRS. FORD. Believe me, there's no such thing

in me.

FAL. What made me love thee? let that persuade thee there's something extraordinary in thee. Come, I cannot cog and say thou art this and that, like a many of these lisping hawthorn-buds, that come like women in men's apparel, and smell like Bucklersbury in simple time; I cannot: but I love thee; none but thee; and thou deservest it.

MRS. FORD. Do not betray me, sir. love Mistress Page.

I fear you

FAL. Thou mightst as well say I love to walk by the Counter-gate, which is as hateful to me as the reek of a lime-kiln.

MRS. FORD. Well, heaven knows how I love you; and you shall one day find it.

FAL. Keep in that mind; I'll deserve it.
MRS. FORD. Nay, I must tell you, so you do; or

else I could not be in that mind.

ROB. [Within] Mistress Ford, Mistress Ford! here's Mistress Page at the door, sweating and blowing and looking wildly, and would needs speak with you presently.

FAL. She shall not see me: I will ensconce me behind the arras.

MRS. FORD. Pray you, do so: she's a very tattling woman. [FALSTAFF hides himself.

Re-enter MISTRESS PAGE and ROBIN.

What's the matter? how now !

MRS. PAGE. O Mistress Ford, what have you done? You're shamed, you're overthrown, you're undone for ever!

MRS. FORD. What's the matter, good Mistress Page?

MRS. PAGE. O well-a-day, Mistress Ford! having an honest man to your husband, to give him such cause of suspicion !

MRS. FORD. What cause of suspicion?

MRS. PAGE. What cause of suspicion! Out upon you! how am I mistook in you!

MRS. FORD. Why, alas, what's the matter? MRS. PAGE. Your husband's coming hither, woman, with all the officers in Windsor, to search for a gentleman that he says is here now in the house by your consent, to take an ill advantage of his absence: you are undone.

MRS. FORD. 'Tis not so, I hope.

MRS. PAGE. Pray heaven it be not so, that you have such a man here! but 'tis most certain your husband's coming, with half Windsor at his heels, to search for such a one. I come before to tell you. If you know yourself clear, why, I am glad of it; but if you have a friend here, convey, convey him out. Be not amazed; call all your senses to you; defend your reputation, or bid farewell to your good life for ever.

MRS. FORD. What shall I do? There is a gentleman my dear friend; and I fear not mine own shame so much as his peril: I had rather than a thousand pound he were out of the house.

MRS. PAGE. For shame! never stand 'you had rather' and 'you had rather:' your husband's here at hand; bethink you of some conveyance: in the house you cannot hide him. O, how have you deceived me! Look, here is a basket: if he be of any reasonable stature, he may creep in here; and throw foul linen upon him, as if it were going to bucking: or-it is whiting-time-send him by your two men to Datchet-mead.

MRS. FORD. He's too big to go in there. What shall I do?

FAL. [Coming forward] Let me see 't, let me see't, O, let me see't! I'll in, I'll in. Follow your friend's counsel. I'll in.

MRS. PAGE. What, Sir John Falstaff! Are these your letters, knight?