Attend the trial we propose to make:

If there be man, who o'er such works can wake,
Sleep's all-subduing charms who dares defy,
And boasts Ulysses' ear with Argus' eye;67

To him we grant our amplest powers to sit
Judge of all present, past, and future wit;
To cavil, censure, dictate, right or wrong,

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Full and eternal privilege of tongue.”

Three college Sophs,68 and three pert Templars came,

The same their talents, and their tastes the same;

380

Each prompt to query, answer, and debate,69

And smit with love of poesy and prate.70

The ponderous books two gentle readers bring:
The heroes sit, the vulgar form a ring;71

The clamorous crowd is hush'd with mugs of mum,
Till all tuned equal, send a general hum.
Then mount the clerks, and in one lazy tone
Through the long, heavy, painful page drawl on;
Soft creeping, words on words, the sense compose,
At every line they stretch, they yawn, they doze.
As to soft gales top-heavy pines bow low
Their heads, and lift them as they cease to blow:
Thus oft they rear, and oft the head decline,
As breathe, or pause, by fits, the airs divine.

And now to this side, now to that they nod,

As verse, or prose, infuse the drowsy god.

Thrice Budgell72 aim'd to speak, but thrice suppress'd
By potent Arthur,72 knock'd his chin and breast.

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390

395

67 See Hom. Odyss. xii.; Ovid. Met. i.

69 [In the early editions, "Three Cambridge Sophs." After Oxford had refused the degree of D.D. to his friend Warburton, Pope was by no means disposed to claim any special favour or honour for that University. In the Fourth Book he satirises it under the designation of "Apollo's Mayor and Aldermen."]

69 "Ambo florentes ætatibus, Arcades ambo,

Et certare pares, et respondere parati."-Virg. Ecl. vi.

70 "Smit with the love of sacred song."-Milton.

71 "Consedere duces, et vulgi stante coronâ."-Ovid. Met. xiii. 72 [Eustace Budgell.-See Notes. "Potent Arthur" was Arthur Onslow, Speaker of the House of Commons.]

Toland and Tindal, prompt at priests to jeer,73
Yet silent bow'd to Christ's no kingdom here.
Who sate the nearest, by the words o'ercome,
Slept first; the distant nodded to the hum.

Then down are roll'd the books; stretch'd o'er 'em lies
Each gentle clerk, and muttering seals his eyes.

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As what a Dutchman plumps into the lakes,
One circle first, and then a second makes;
What Dulness dropp'd among her sons impress'd
Like motion from one circle to the rest:

So from the midmost the nutation spreads

Round and more round, o'er all the sea of heads.74

405

410

78 Two persons, not so happy as to be obscure, who wrote against the religion of their country. In the first edition it was:

74 "

"Collins and Tidal, prompt at priests to jeer."

A waving sea of heads was round me spread,

And still fresh streams the gazing deluge fed."-Blackm. Job.

Boyer the state, and Law the stage gave o'er,
Morgan and Mandeville could prate no more;
Norton, from Daniel and Ostroea sprung, 75
Bless'd with his father's front, and mother's tongue,
Hung silent down his never-blushing head;

415

And all was hush'd, as Folly's self lay dead.76

Thus the soft gifts of sleep conclude the day,
And stretch'd on bulks, as usual, poets lay.
Why should I sing, what bards the nightly Muse
Did slumbering visit, and convey to stews;
Who prouder march'd, with magistrates in state,
To some famed round-house, ever open gate!
Now Henley lay inspired beside a sink,

And to mere mortals seem'd a priest in drink:77

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425

75 Norton de Foe, offspring of the famous Daniel. Fortes creantur fortibus. One of the authors of the Flying Post, in which well-bred work Mr. P. had some time the honour to be abused with his betters; and of many hired scurrilities and daily papers, to which he never set his name. 76 Alludes to Dryden's verse in the Indian Emperor :

"All things are hush'd, as Nature's self lay dead."

This line presents us with an excellent moral, that we are never to pass judgment merely by appearances; a lesson to all men who may happen to

While others, timely, to the neighbouring Fleet 78 (Haunt of the muses) made their safe retreat.

see a reverend person in the same situation, not to determine too rashly: since not only the poets frequently describe a bard inspired in this posture,("On Cam's fair bank where Chaucer lay inspired,"

and the like) but an eminent casuist tells us, that "if a priest be seen in any indecent action, we ought to account it a deception of sight, or illusion of the devil, who sometimes takes upon him the shape of holy men on pur pose to cause scandal."-Scribl.

[Instead of Henley, "Laurus was the name originally given, and there was a note pointing out that Eusden was the party intended.]

78 A prison for insolvent debtors, on the bank of the ditch. [In which Wycherley lay seven years!]

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BOOK THE THIRD.

ARGUMENT.

After the other persons are disposed in their proper places of rest, the goddess transports the king to her temple, and there lays him to slumber with his head on her lap: a position of marvellous virtue, which causes all the visions of wild enthusiasts, projectors, politicians, inamoratos, castle-builders, chemists, and poets. He is immediately carried on the wings of Fancy, and led, by a mad poetical Sibyl, to the Elysian shade, where, on the banks of Lethe, the souls of the dull are dipped by Bavius, before their entrance into this world: there he is met by the ghost of Settle, and by him made acquainted with the wonders of the place, and with those which he himself is destined to perform. He takes him to a mount of vision, from whence he shows him the past triumphs of the empire of Dulness, then the present, and lastly the future: how small a part of the world was ever conquered by science, how soon those conquests were stopped, and those very nations again reduced to her dominion: then, distinguishing the island of Great Britain, shows by what aids, by what persons, and by what degrees, it shall be brought to her empire: some of the persons he causes to pass in review before his eyes, describing each by his proper figure, character, and qualifications. On a sudden, the scene shifts, and a vast number of miracles and prodigies appear, utterly surprising and unknown to the king himself, till they are explained to be the wonders of his own reign now commencing. On this subject Settle breaks into a congratulation, yet not unmixed with concern, that his own times were but the types of these. He prophesies how first the nation shall be overrun with farces, operas, and shows; how the throne of Dulness shall be advanced over the theatres, and set up even at Court; then how her sons shall preside in the seats of arts and sciences; giving a glimpse, or Pisgah-sight, of the future fulness of her glory, the accomplishment whereof is the subject of the fourth and last book.

BUT in her temple's last recess inclosed,

On Dulness' lap th' anointed head reposed.

Him close she curtains round with vapours blue,
And soft besprinkles with Cimmerian dew.