a brother augur in the world. They understand each other perfectly, and, so far, there is no hypocrisy in the case. But if C comes up, and hears their discourse, he takes it (not being of the Freemasonry) tout de bon, for solemn earnest. Oho! quoth he to himself, here are A and B, two most respectable persons, having lands and beeves, householders, freeholders, nay, justices of the peace, ay, and rotulorum too" it may be, or, at least, members of the society for prosecuting small felons; they are talking sad nonsense to be sure, and, if I did not know them to be too grave for a jest, I should think they were hoaxing. But it would not be decent to contradict them. It would be the most dangerous, and therefore the most indecent thing in the world, to gainsay such very highly considered personages. I should be cut, abused, misreported, and thrown out of the way of all promotion, if I did; and, so saying, (not aloud, like Mr. Gurney's friend, Nubly, but in an aside to himself,) away he goes, swelling the cry, and frightening in his turn all who are one step below him in the world into a similar denial of their own conscientious and inward belief. Thus the humbug spreads through the entire alphabet; every one of the demure letters giving the others credit for a sincerity which they dare not themselves exert, and joining in a farce in which each thinks himself the only accomplished actor. If we desire to call an "honourable member" any imaginable series of hard names, reflecting on his honesty or veracity, there are appointed certain decent phrases, sunt certa piacula, which shut out all the usual unpleasant consequences. Thus, instead of "lie," decency suggests “mistake," and when you lay it on thick on other breaches of moral propriety, decency slips in, as your only peace-maker," the word political; it being a part of her code, that a man may be the greatest political scoundrel past, present, or to come, without any derogation to his worth as a private gentleman. This saves Mr. Speaker a deal of trouble, spares a delicate ear the unpleasant jarring click of the pistol, and enables mothers and daughters to sleep in security, while their husbands are detained away from them in debate. Then, again, it is unparliamentary and indecent to apostrophise a member by his name; while you may rail against him, usque ad delicias votorum, as the gallant member for Guzzledown," or "the nubble lud on the cross-benches." The reason is plain; to call a man by his name in a large assembly draws all the blood into his face, and provokes all his latent irascibilities : whereas he can, or ought, to listen to the evil doings charged against his parliamentary nickname, with becoming composure. Observe that nothing is lost by these decencies: a lie conveyed in orderly phrase is as intelligible to all the world, as if it were given in express terms; and a crimination derives no increase of intensity from calling up six members to order, and awakening all the interference of the Speaker and his serjeant-at-arms. There is a little curiosity about these decencies that we may as well mention while we think of it, and that is the caprice with which they will run down some unfortunate word, which, after having done yeoman's service for ages in civil society, suddenly finds itself voted mauvais ton, and banished to boors and rustics, without having committed any crime which can be charged against it. Among the imputations of indecency brought against Beaumarchais' too celebrated comedy was, that he had assigned the Countess Almaviva a retreat at the Ursulines. Ursulines! cries a dandy; Ursulines! echoes a female exquisite. Was there ever anything so indecent? responds an abbé. Now, as the author remarks, there was nothing peculiar in the Ursuline convent. He might have written Celestines, Augustines, or Visitandines, if it had so occurred to him; but Ursuline caught the public ear at a moment when the public was disposed to be critical, and Ursuline was condemned without pity. With an equal disregard to the truth of nature' society has banished a number of inoffensive vocables that have given great offence. It is not very long ago since we heard Charles Kemble read an act of Shakspeare's Henry the Fourth to a rather select audience of the very best company in London; and we were not a little surprised at finding that he could scarcely get through half a dozen sentences, without being obliged to bolt some of these discarded serving-men of the dictionary, -"words which wise Raleigh," ay, and chaste Elizabeth, freely used; but which are now condemned, from our tender regard to decency, to keep company with the predecessor of inexpressibles, the feminine of varlet, and divers other antiquated, but healthy proprieties too tedious to mention. It is by this species of ostracism that "stomach" has been enabled to usurp the whole domain of the front of the trunk; that "legs" have been raised in the world to stand for the entire lower extremity; and that ladies are forced to bustle through society, like the painted cherubims of altarpieces and pulpits, without anything to sit on. Thus it happens, too, that though a well-bred female may continually make a shift, she must not wear one; and that, while every chicken may have a breast without loss of caste, a woman is obliged to go about the world with a neck that reaches from her chin to her stomacher. But to return : As the decencies were invented by civilised society, and men exist in various states of civilisation, it is not strange that decency should be a very local quality, and that things which are decent in one society should not be necessarily so in all others. Hence it becomes no mean point of the savoir vivre to suit your decencies to the proper occasion,a truth proverbially expressed by the direction not to speak of ropes in a house where the master has been hanged. Among thieves and gipsies, for instance, one use of what is called the cant language is to enable the speaker to avoid certain ill-sounding technicalities, which are voted indecent in their associations. To prig and to nim,- convey, the wise it call,”—arouse not those ill-omened associations excited by the ordinary synonym employed in indictments. On the same principle, in certain high societies, seduction and adultery have been banished to make room for a liaison, a flirtation, an affaire de cœur, &c. &c. Nice persons, says Swift, have nasty ideas; and the less decency the world observes in its actions, the greater decency it requires in its language. It is not the word itself that is indecent, for one combination of letters is neither better nor worse than another, except as it is more or less easily pronounceable; the decency or indecency applies to the ideas it may represent. Among a simple, virtuous, unsophistical people, the coarsest term may stand for much fewer and less offensive ideas, than the most refined euphonism in the mouth of a corrupt society. But then, when in the latter case a refined phrase is preferred (provided it be not too technical and already on the decline), the hearer is left at liberty to understand as much or as little as he chooses, which is a great practical convenience, and saves an infinity of blushing. This susceptibility to nice distinctions is therefore a decisive mark of natural politeness. The Athenians, the most elegant people of antiquity, called their prison by the gentle term of Oikua, "the house." In a like spirit, "cheating" among lawyers is, by well-bred Englishmen, veiled under the gentle denomination of "sharp practice;" while on the racecourse and club-house it passeth current for "knowledge of the world," or "being up to a thing or two." For the decent observance of the decencies, without which no man is qualified for genteel life, the knowledge of a few general rules is of vast service, and is the only sure guide in all cases not provided for by established precedent. The first and most extensively applicable is the Englishman's boasted privilege, his claim to be considered innocent until he is found guilty. Thus, for example, if a man by dint of his pistol prevents the dupe whom he has cheated at cards from making a formal complaint against him, it is decent to treat him as a man of honour: so, with respect to females, it is the divorce and not the fact that tarnishes; and, as long as a husband countenances his wife's goings on," she is, to all social intents and purposes, an honest woman. Again, if a man has committed forgery, and his friends buy off the prosecution, non constat that he has done anything wrong to disqualify him for social relations. 66 From this principle it follows, as ready as a borrower's cap," that no action can be imputed against any one that does not come within the cognisance of a court of law; bad fathers and mothers, severe husbands, hard-hearted creditors, or persecuting landlords, may be all very decent people, and highly respectable; and to have ruined half a score of tailors, and half a hundred grisettes, does not black-bean, in the very best company. To the universality of this rule, however, there is one marked and striking exception,-it grants nothing in favour of any practice that is decidedly low. The utmost innocence is no defence for that which is rendered indecent by the circumstances of its environage. To beggar a wife and her children at an accredited club is no derogation to the perfect gentleman; but to be seen in a vulgar hell, or to lose money at a thimble-rig, is matter for just censure. Closely allied in principle with this rule is another, which gives a brevet of respectability to all persons having, as the "Rejected Addresses" finely phrased it, "anything to give." It is but an homely proverb that forbids the looking a gift horse in the mouth; but it contains much wisdom. Charity, also, says a higher authority, covers a multitude of sins; and, though one would not absolutely call Amphitryonism a charity, there is assuredly as much Christian benevolence in a parade of three courses and a dessert, as in contributing to any well-puffed and wellpublished subscription. Accordingly, if the feed be magnificent and the company good, dinner-giving whitewashes a fraudulent bankrupt morally, as thoroughly as an insolvent court can perform the same feat in a pecuniary sense. In ancient Rome, the Trimalcions were never questioned as to their antecedents. The criminibus debent hortos was unthought of, save by some cross-grained, disappointed satirist, who was probably piqued at not having the entrée to those exclusive shades; but with us (and we would have you mark the superiority of our Christian over heathen morals), so lightly do we in such cases scan the frailties of our brother men,' ," that we not only pardon all sins in the possessor of a fine house and establishment, but we would overlook even the atrocious offence against good taste of an eminent dust-contractor, a parvenu vender of blacking, or an emeritus pawnbroker, in asking us to roturier but well-furnished table. On the other hand, there is not the slightest decency required in the instance of him with whom the protecting virtue no longer resides. No matter what services you have received, or how many dinners you have eaten with the man who is irrecoverably ruined, you are no longer called upon to overlook his immoralities or to pardon his frailties; on the contrary, it is perfectly decent to censure his generosity as profusion, and to set down his misfortunes to the least creditable causes that your invention can suggest: and this latitude is the more readily granted, because a convenient excuse may not otherwise be at hand to justify a denial of assistance, or a cut direct. As the greatest virtue in a public man is to be true to his party, there is nothing so little decent as to set up your own private standards of morality, or to profess a thin-skinned tenderness, which is not only injurious to the great end of all political unions, but an indirect censure on those who are less nice than yourself. In politics, as in love, se piace, e lice; and lying, back-biting, and trickery of all sorts, are perfectly decent. If, however, you have determined to rat, the case is toto cœlo different; you are then not only at liberty to abuse the future acts of your former associates, but to denounce even those of their measures quorum pars magna fuisti. We One essential branch of decency, whether in public or in private life, is the wearing a decent coat. This is a sine quâ non in the morality of a poor man; and even in a peer, or a millionaire, is a merit. never could approve of men in a high station dressing shabbily because they can afford it; and we are as nearly certain (as in such a case is possible) that the Right Reverend Bishops have swerved from the decent splendour of the Establishment in appearing before the public without their wigs. Ir a man lives in the country, he should, before all things, be in possession of the broad acres; with that qualification, everything in life nearly is decent: nay, a proprietor might even be a Presbyterian without loss of caste,-but then, by jingo, he must count his acres by thousands. If, however, the chances are against you, and you cannot, per fas aut nefas, attain to such a perfection, it is a first point of decency to think on all things with those who on that point are your superiors. You must vote with the landlord, whose estate you would otherwise encumber with your presence. You must be orthodox with the parsons, loyal with the excisemen, serious with the lady of the manor, if she be so inclined; but if not, not. You must have a deferential respect for all decisions of the quorum, raise no parish rebellions, nor dispute any parish rates; never interfere with the closing of pathways, and deal only with decent tradesmen. Add to these virtues a decided dislike to all sorts of sporting, except on invitation, play well enough at billiards to be beaten "upon instinct," have no objection to long whist, ride a good horse, and go regularly to church in all weathers, and you will be welcome at every house, and pass muster in the very best, as being-almost a gentleman. In London, the trade of a decent personage is less laborious; but it perhaps requires a higher degree of tact. Public opinion, there, does not set altogether in so decided a current; and it is not always so easy to discover precisely what is decent for the time being. There are circumstances in which it would be as difficult to distinguish between a propriety and a scandal, as between the theology of Dr. Pusey and that of the Cardinals of Rome. A difference no doubt there is; but the thing is to seize upon it. On such occasions the best way is to keep our opinions to ourselves, and say nothing on the subject "till there's a peace." With due discretion on this head, if you belong to the proper clubs, subscribe to the proper charities, avoid all general propositions, and loudly proclaim yourself a practical man,-taking special care to adopt and discard each successive humbug at the proper moment, sticking neither at homoeopathy, animal magnetism, the unknown tongues, nor whatever other absurdity may happen for the moment to be voted respectable, and you may then contrive to pass muster. To sum up the whole of this corps de doctrine in one compendious maxim,—the man who is emulous of a character for the decencies must strive with might and main to render himself as little conspicuous as possible: mediocrity is his haven of safety, and nothingness a plate armour absolutely bullet proof. He who is distinguished for virtue, for talent, for honesty, public principle, or even for an Herculean edition of the Apollo model in his personal proportions, will meet with enemies enough to denounce him for his breach of conventional proprieties; but the man who dares to think for himself, and, daring to do so, has the hardihood to utter his thoughts, is a lost man, “a d-d black sheep," and an outcast from all decent society. μ THE POET'S HYMN TO SPRING. BY MRS. C. B. WILSON. SPRING! let thy breezes fan my hectic cheek, For, I am weary of the winter's gloom- |