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❝roneous Maxims." Far from it (answers Crambe) my life is as orderly as my Dictionary, for by my Dictionary I order my life. I have made a Kalendar of radical words for all the seasons, months, and days of the year: Every day I am under the dominion of a certain Word: but this day in particular I cannot be misled, for I am governed by one that rules all fexes, ages, conditions, nay all animals rational and irrational. Who is not governed by the word Led? our Noblemen and Drunkards are Pimp-led, Phyficians and Pulfes fee led, their Patients and Oranges pil-led, a Newmarried Man and an Afs are bride-led, an old-married Man and a Pack-horfe fad-led, Cats and Dice are rat-led, Swine and Nobility are fty-led, a Coquet and a Tinder-box are fpark-led, a Lover and a Blunderer are grove-led. And that I may not be tedious-Which thou art (replied Martin, ftamping with his foot) which thou art, I fay, beyond all human toleration. Such an unnatural, unaccountable, uncoherent, unintelligible, unprofitable There it is now! (interrupted Crambe) this is your Day for Uns. Martin could bear no longer however, compofing his Coun. tenance, Come hither, he cried, there are five pounds, feventeen fhillings and nine-peace: thou haft been with me eight months, three weeks, two days, and four hours. Poor Crambe upon

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the receipt of his Salary, fell into tears, flung the money upon the ground, and burft forth in thefe words:- O Cicero, Cicero! if to pun be a crime, 'tis a crime I have learned from thee O Bias, Bias! if to pun be a crime, by thy example was I biafs'd.Whereupon Martin (confidering that one of the greatest of Orators, and even a Sage of Greece had punned) hesitated, relented, and reinstated Crambe in his Service.

I

CHA P. IX.

How Martin became a great Critick.

T was a moft peculiar Talent in Martinus, to

convert every trifle into a serious thing, either in the way of Life, or in Learning. This can no way be better exemplified, than in the effect which the Puns of Crambe had on the Mind and Studies of Martinus. He conceived, that fomewhat of a like Talent to this of Crambe, of assembling paral lel founds, either fyllables, or words, might conduce to the Emendation and Correction of Ancient Au

thors, if applied to their Works,

with the fame diligence, and the fame liberty. He refolved to try firft upon Virgil, Horace, and Terence; con

cluding, that, if the most correct Authors could be fo ferved with any reputation to the Critick, the amendment and alteration of all the rest would eafily follow; whereby a new, a vaft, nay boundless Field of Glory would be opened to abfolute Critic.

the true and

This Specimen on Virgil he has given us, in the Addenda to his Notes on the Dunciad. His Te rence and Horace are in every body's hands, under the names of Richard Bley, and Francis

And we have convincing proofs that the late Edition of Milton published in the name of the former of thefe, was in truth the Work of no other than our Scriblerus.

СНАР. Х.

Of Martinus's uncommon Practice of Phyfick, and how he apply'd himself to the Difeafes of the Mind.

B

UT it is high time to return to the History

of the Progress of Martinus in the Studies of Phyfick, and to enumerate fome at leaft of the many Discoveries and Experiments he made therein.

One of the first was his Method of investigating

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latent Diftempers, by the fagacious Quality of Setting-Dogs and Pointers. The fuccefs, and the Adventures that befel him, when he walked with thefe Animals, to fmell them out in the Parks and publick places about London, are what we would willingly relate; but that his own Account, toge ther with a Lift of thofe Gentlemen and Ladies at whom they made a Full fet, will be published in time convenient. There will also be added the Representation, which, on occafion of one diftemper which was become almoft epidemical, he thought himself obliged to lay before both Houses of Parliament, intitled, A Propofal for a General Flux, to exterminate at one blow the P-x out of this kingdom.

But being weary of all practice on fætid Bodies; from a certain nicenefs of Conftitution, (especially when he attended Dr. Woodward thro' a Twelvemonth's course of Vomition) he determined to leave it off entirely, and to apply himself only to difeafes of the Mind. He attempted to find out Specificks for all the Paffions; and as other Physicians throw their Patients into. fweats, vomits, purgations, etc. he caft them into Love, Hatred, Hope, Fear, Joy, Grief, etc. And indeed the great Irregularity of the Paffions in the English Nation, was the chief motive that induced him to apply his whole ftudies, while he continued among us, to the Difeafcs of the Mind.

to To this purpose he directed, in the first place, his fate acquired skill in Anatomy. He confidered Virtues and Vices as certain Habits which proceed from the natural Formation and Structure of particular parts of the body. A bird flies because it has Wings, a Duck swims because it is web-footed: and there can be no queftion but the aduncity of the pounces and beaks of the Hawks, as well as the length of the fangs, the fharpness of the teeth, and the strength of the crural and maffeter-mufcles in Lions and Tygers, are the caufe of the great and habitual Immorality of thofe Animals.

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ift, He obferved, that the Soul and Body mutually operate upon each other, and therefore if you deprive the Mind of the outward Inftruments whereby the ufually expreffeth that Paffion, you will in time abate the Paffion itself, in like manner as Caftration abates LüAVOI

zdly, That the Soul in mankind expreffeth every Paffion by the Motion of fome particular Muscles.

913dly, That all Mufcles grow ftronger and thicker by being much used; therefore the habitual Pafhions may be difcerned in particular perfons by * Μασσητήρες μύες.

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