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working a reformation in the squire himself; yet it so far operated on his conscience, that he put the laws very severely in execution against others, and the magistrate was the only person in the parish who could swear with impunity.
MR. Allworthy was now retired from breakfast with his nephew, well satisfied with the report of the young gentleman's successful visit to Sophia, (for he greatly desired the match, more on account of the young lady's character than of her riches) when Mr. Western broke abruptly in upon them, and without any ceremony began as follows:— “There, you have done a fine piece of work “truly. You have brought up your bastard to a • fine purpose; not that I believe you had any hand in it neither, that is, as a man may say, designed‘ly; but there is a fine kettle of fish made on't up “ at our house.’ — ‘What can be the matter, Mr. • Western ?’ says Allworthy. “O, matter enow of all • conscience: my daughter hath fallen in love with “your bastard, that's all; but I won't ge her a ha“ peny, not the twentieth part of a brass varden. I ‘ always thought what would come o' breeding up a ‘bastard like a gentleman, and letting un come * about to vok's houses. Its well vor un I could not & & & 4. o o: < e
get at un; I'd a licked um ; I'd a spoil'd his caterwauling; I'd a taught the son of a whore to meddle with meat for his master. He shan't ever have a morsel of meat of mine, or a varden to buy it: if she will ha un, one smock shall be her portion. I'll sooner ge my esteate to the zinking fund, that it may be sent to Hanover to corrupt our nation with.’ — ‘ I am heartily sorry, cries Allworthy, “Pox o' your sorrow,” says Western; “it will do me abundance of good when I have lost my only child, my poor Sophy, that was the joy of my heart, and all the hope and comfort of my age; but I am resolved I will turn her out o' doors; she shall beg, and starve, and rot in the streets. Not one hapeny, not a hapeny shall she ever hae o' mine. The son of a bitch was always good at finding a hare sitting, an be rotted to'n: I little thought what puss he was looking after ; but it shall be the worst he ever wound in his life. She shall be no better than carrion : the skin o'er is all he shall ha, and zu you may tell um.”—“I am in amazement,’ cries Allworthy, “at what you tell me, after what passed between my nephew and the young lady no longer ago than yesterday.’— Yes, sir,’ answered Western, “it was after what passed between your nephew and she that the whole matter came out. Mr. Blifil there was no sooner gone, than the son of a whore came lurching about the house. Little did I think, when I used to love him for a sportsman, that he was all the while a poaching after my daughter.” — ‘Why, truly,’ says Allworthy, ‘I could wish you had not given him so many opportunities with her; and you will do me the justice to acknowledge that I have always been averse to his staying so much at your house, though I own I had no suspicion of this kind.”—“Why, zounds!' cries Western, who could have thought it? What the devil had she to do wi'n He did not come there a courting to her; he came there a hunting with me.’ — ‘But was it possible,’ says Allworthy, ‘that you should never discern any symptoms of love between them, ‘when you have seen them so often together ?'— * Never in my life, as I hope to be zaved, cries Western : ‘I never so much as zeed him kiss her ‘in all my life; and so far from courting her, he ‘ used rather to be more silent when she was in
‘company than at any other time; and as for the ‘ girl, she was always less civil to'n than to any ‘young man that came to the house. As to that ‘matter, I am not more easy to be deceived than ‘another; I would not have you think I am, neigh“bour.' Allworthy could scarce refrain laughter at this; but he resolved to do a violence to himself; for he perfectly well knew mankind, and had too much good-breeding and good-nature to offend the squire in his present circumstances. He then asked Western what he would have him do upon this occasion. To which the other answered, “That he “would have him keep the rascal away from his ‘ house, and that he would go and lock up the ‘wench; for he was resolved to make her marry “Mr. Blifil in spite of her teeth.’ He then shook Blifil by the hand, and swore he would have no other son-in-law. Presently after which he took his leave; saying his house was in such diso, der that it was necessary for him to make haste home, to take care his daughter did not give him the slip ; and as for Jones, he swore if he caught him at his house, he would qualify him to run for the geldings' plate. - When Allworthy and Blifil were again left together, a long silence ensued between them; all which interval the young gentleman filled up with sighs, which proceeded partly from disappointment, but more from hatred ; for the success of Jones was much more grievous to him than the loss of Sophia. At length his uncle asked him what he was determined to do, and he answered in the following words: • Alas! sir, can it be a question what step a lover * will take, when reason and passion point different ‘ ways I am afraid it is too certain he will, in that • dilemma, always follow the latter. Reason dic• tates to me, to quit all thoughts of a woman who “ places her affections on another; my passion bids ‘me hope she may, in time, change her inclinations
“in my favour. Here, however, I conceive an ob“jection may be raised, which, if it could not fully ‘ be answered, would totally deter me from any ‘ further pursuit. I mean, the injustice of endea‘ vouring to supplant another in a heart of which ‘ he seems already in possession; but the determin‘ed resolution of Mr. Western shows, that, in this case, I shall, by so doing, promote the happiness of every party; not only that of the parent, who will thus be preserved from the highest degree of misery, but of both the others, who must be undone by this match. The lady, I am sure, will be. undone in every sense; for, besides the loss of most part of her own fortune, she will be not only married to a beggar, but the little fortune which her father cannot withhold from her, will be squandered on that wench, with whom I know he yet converses. Nay, that is a trifle; for I know him to be one of the worst men in the world; for had my dear uncle known what I have hitherto endeavoured to conceal, he must have long since abandoned so profligate a wretch.”—How !” said Allworthy; hath he done any thing worse than I already know? Tell me, I beseech you.”—“No,' replied Blifil; “it is now past, and perhaps he may have repented of it.”—“I command you, on your duty,’ said Allworthy, ‘to tell me what you mean.”—“You know, ‘ sir,’ says Blifil, ‘I never disobeyed you; but I am * Sorry I mentioned it, since it may now look like “revenge, whereas, I thank heaven, no such motive “ever entered my heart; and if you oblige me to ‘ discover it, I must be his petitioner to you for “ your forgiveness.”—“I will have no conditions,' answered Allworthy; ‘I think I have shown tender* ness enough towards him, and more perhaps than “ you ought to thank me for.”—“More, indeed, I * fear, than he deserved, cries Blifil ; ‘ for in the ‘ very day of your utmost danger, when myself and * all the family were in tears, he filled the house with
‘ riot and debauchery. He drank, and sung, and ‘ roared; and when I gave him a gentle hint of the * indecency of his actions, he fell into a violent pas“sion, swore many oaths, called me rascal, and struck ‘me.”—“How !' cries Allworthy; ‘did he dare to ‘strike you?”—“I am sure, cries Blifil, ‘I have for‘given him that long ago. I wish I could so easily * forget his ingratitude to the best of benefactors; ‘ and yet, even that I hope you will forgive him, * since he must have certainly been possessed with * the devil; for that very evening, as Mr. Thwackum ‘ and myself were taking the air in the fields, and ‘ exulting in the good symptoms which then first * began to discover themselves, we unluckily saw ‘ him engaged with a wench in a manner not fit to ‘ be mentioned. Mr. Thwackum, with more bold‘ness than prudence, advanced to rebuke him, when ‘(I am sorry to say it) he fell upon the worthy man, ‘ and beat him so outrageously that I wish he may “ have yet recovered the bruises. Nor was I with‘ out my share of the effects of his malice, while I ‘ endeavoured to protect my tutor; but that I have ‘ long forgiven; nay, I prevailed with Mr.Thwack‘ um to forgive him too, and not to inform you of a “secret which I feared might be fatal to him. And * now, sir, since I have unadvisedly dropped a hint * of this matter, and your commands have obliged * me to discover the whole, let me intercede with “you for him.”—“O child!” said Allworthy, ‘I know * not whether I should blame or applaud your good‘ness, in concealing such villany a moment; but * where is Mr. Thwackum ? Not that I want any “confirmation of what you say; but I will examine * all the evidence of this matter, to justify to the “world the example I am resolved to make of such * a monster.’ Thwackum was now sent for, and presently appeared. He corroborated every circumstance which the other had deposed; nay, he produced the re