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Thou! why thou wilt quarrel with a man that hath a hair more or a hair less in his beard than thou bast: thou wilt quarrel with a man for cracking nuts, having no other reason but because thou hast hazel eyes.
What eye, but such an eye, would spy out such a quarrel ? Thy head is as full of quarrels as an egg is full of meat; and yet thy head hath been beaten as addle as an egg for quarrelling. Thou hast quarrelled with a man for coughing in the street, because he hath wakened thy dog that hath lain asleep in the sun. Didst thou not fall out with a tailor for wearing his new doublet before Easter? with another, for tying his new shoes with old riband ? and yet thou wilt tutor me from quarrelling!
Ben. An I were so apt to quarrel as thou art, any man should buy the fee-simple of my life for an hour and a quarter.
Mer. The fee-simple? O simple!
Enter TYBALT and others.
Ty. Follow me close, for I will speak to them. Gentlemen, good den:1 a word with one of you.
Mer. And but one word with one of us ? Couple it with something; make it a word and a blow.
Ty. You will find me apt enough to that, sir, if you will give me occasion.
Mer. Could you not take some occasion without giving ?
Ty. Mercutio, thou consortest with Romeo.
Mer. Consort! what, dost thou make us minstrels ? an thou make minstrels of us, look to hear nothing but discords : here's my fiddlestick; here's that shall make you dance. Zounds, consort !
Ben. We talk here in the public haunt of men : Either withdraw into some private place, Or reason coldly of your grievances, Or else depart : here all eyes gaze on us.. Mer. Men's eyes were made to look, and let them
gaze; I will not budge for no man's pleasure, I.
Ty. Well, peace be with you, sir! here comes
my man. Mer. But I'll be hang'd, sir, if he wear your
livery. Marry, go before to field, he'll be
follower: Your worship, in that sense, may call him man.
Ty. Romeo, the hate I bear thee, can afford No better term than this ;—thou art a villain.
Ro. Tybalt, the reason that I have to love thee Doth much excuse the appertaining rage To such a greeting.–Villain am I none; Therefore farewell; I see, thou know'st me not.
Ty. Boy, this shall not excuse the injuries That thou hast done me; therefore turn, and draw.
Ro. I do protest, I never injured thee ;
Mer. O calm, dishonorable, vile submission !
[draws. Tybalt, you rat-catcher, will you walk ?
Ty. What wouldst thou have with me?
Mer. Good king of cats, nothing, but one of your nine lives; that I mean to make bold withal, and, as you shall use me hereafter, drybeat the rest of the eight. Will you pluck your sword out of his pilcher ? by the ears? Make haste, lest mine be about your ears ere it be out. Ty. I am for you.
[drawing Ro. Gentle Mercutio, put thy rapier up. Mer. Come, sir, your passado. [they fight.
Ro. Draw, Benvolio ; Beat down their weapons :-gentlemen, for shame Forbear this outrage ;--Tybalt-MercutioThe prince expressly hath forbid this bandying In Verona streets :-hold, Tybalt;—good Mercutio.
[Exeunt Tybalt and his partisans. Mer. I am hurt ;A plague o' both the houses !—I am sped :Is he gone, and hath nothing?
1 The Italian term for a thrust or stab with a rapier.
What, art thou hurt? Mer. Ay, ay, a scratch, a scratch; marry, 'tis
enough. Where is my page ?-go, villain ; fetch a surgeon.
[Exit Page. Ro. Courage, man ; the hurt cannot be much.
Mer. No, 'tis not so deep as a well, nor so wide as a church door ; but ’tis enough ; 'twill serve : ask for me to-morrow, and you shall find me a grave man. I am peppered, I warrant, for this world :a plague o' both your houses !-Zounds, a dog, a rat, a mouse, a cat, to scratch a man to death! a braggart, a rogue, a villain, that fights by the book of arithmetic !—Why, the devil, came you between us? I was hurt under your arm.
Ro. I thought all for the best.
Mer. Help me into some house, Benvolio,
[Exeunt Mercutio and Benvolio.
- sweet Juliet, Thy beauty hath made me effeminate, And in my temper soften'd valor's steel.
Re-enter BENVOLIO. Ben. O, Romeo, Romeo, brave Mercutio 's dead;
That gallant spirit hath aspired the clouds,
Re-enter TYBALT. Ben. Here comes the furious Tybalt back again.
Ro. Alive! in triumph! and Mercutio slain ! Away to heaven, respective i lenity, And fire-eyed fury be my conduct? now!Now, Tybalt, take the villain back again, That late thou gavest me; for Mercutio's soul Is but a little way above our heads, Staying for thine to keep him company : Either thou, or I, or both, must go with him. Ty. Thou, wretched boy, that didst consort him
here, Shalt with him hence. Ro.
This shall determine that.
[they fight; Tybalt falls. Ben. Romeo, away, The citizens are up, and Tybalt slain :Stand not amazed :—the prince will doom thee
death, If thou art taken :-hence !-be gone !-away!
Ro. O! I am Fortune's fool!
2 For conductor.