perhaps a little strong for a juvenile; nevertheless, as it is vouched for by a Yankee schoolma'am, it may as well go into type:

cisco every spring by the whalers who cruised in the Okhotsk Sea and the North Pacific, and were given by them to the natives on the seacoast, who, attracted by the pictures, sought them eagerly, and circulated them in their winter wanderings throughout the interior. How far the pacific disposition, hospitality, and general good character of the Siberian natives is attributable to the refining and humanizing influences of Harper's Magazine I will not undertake to say, but that it circulates among the Tchucktchis and Koriaks regularly and extensively I know from personal observation. If the American Board of Foreign Missions would listen to the humble suggestions of a traveler among the heathen, I should propose that it buy a few thousand copies of Harper's and give them to the whalers for general distribution. It is generally conceded by philanthropists that education must precede conversion, and I know of no better medium of in

Among her pupils was a boy of about four years, who did not speak very plainly. One day, while the others were at their studies, he got possession of a pin and string. He bent the pin in the form of a fish-hook, tied the string to it, and put on a small piece of cheese. He had seen a mouse come up through a hole in a corner of the hearth, and set himself to bob for it as though it had been a fish. He was observed, and asked what he was doing. "Fishing for a mouse," was the reply. As this was not allowed in school hours, he was ordered, as punishment, to continue bobbing. So the little fellow sat, as grave as a judge, bobbing away, until soon the mouse took a strong hold of the cheese, and the boy, giving a sudden pull, sprang into the middle of the room, and swinging the mouse around his head, astonished the whole school with the ex-struction than the said Magazine. If the exclamation, "I thwar I've got him!"

A GENTLEMAN recently returned from a little pleasure trip in Kamchatka is courteous enough to send us the following note, showing that in the wildest and most uninhabitable parts of the globe Harper's Magazine and Harper's Weekly are popular with the natives. He says:

I

plorer of our Western prairies, who has been robbed, scalped, and left for dead by Apaches, will live for a few weeks with the Tchucktchis of Northeastern Asia-a no less barbarous tribehe will become convinced that Harper's Magazine, as a civilizing agent, is in no way inferior to a first-class missionary.

LOUIS NAPOLEON's dislike for journalists is tolerably well understood, and those who surround him at court of course partake of his notions toward that style of person. We have, in one of the comic journals of Paris, a report of the conversation of two old conservatives, who attributed all the misfortunes in this world to the press:

"And what has become of the son of our friend X-?"

"Don't ask me: he has turned out badly." "How is that? I thought he was intelligent and industrious. What has become of him?" "He has become a journalist."

It is customary, I believe, among a certain class WE fear there was a little self-righteousness in of authors to beg a favorable reception of badly- that venerable old sinner who, being at seventywritten articles by the most exaggerated praise five on his death-bed, was fervently exhorted to of your "excellent and widely-circulated Maga- the duty of repentance. "Repent!" answered zine." I hope, however, that it will not be at-he, indignantly; "I don't see what I have to retributed to any such motive if I tell you, as a pent of. I don't know that I ever denied myself mere matter of curiosity, how wide your circula- any thing!" tion really is. I have been engaged for the past three years in explorations for the Russian American Telegraph Company in Kamchatka and Northeastern Asia, and returned only last March, vid Irkutsk and St. Petersburg, to America. My duties, of course, necessitated constant and extensive travel among the wild tribes of natives who inhabit the lonely steppes between Bering Strait and the Amoor River; and you can imagine the surprise with which I met every where copies of Harper's Magazine and Weekly. knew that they were to be found in almost all parts of the habitable world, but their presence in localities which no white man had ever before visited was an almost inexplicable mystery. The walls of several native huts in Kamchatka were papered with Porte Crayon's sketches, and the proprietors evidently regarded them with pardonable pride, as incontestable evidences of their MR. DILKE having asked a Western man his own æsthetical taste and superior cultivation. I views on the Indian question, was answered: even saw in one Kamchadal yourt on the Kam-"Well, Sir, we can destroy them by the laws of chatka River a portrait, cut from Harper's Week- war, or thin 'em out by whisky-but the thinly, of Major-General Dix, and as the limited ning process is plaguy slow!" means of the owner forbade the purchase of a saint to put in the corner, our distinguished General was elevated to that sacred, position, and votive candles were burning before his stern, masculine features. I suppose the poor Kamchadal thought that as he was an American he must be a saint, or that if he were not he ought to be, and he reverently crossed himself and said his daily prayers before the canonized image of a MajorGeneral in the United States Army! I learned subsequently in what way the publications of Harpers reached this neglected corner of the world. They were brought up from San Fran

A journalist!-and his father is such an honest man! It is incredible!"

As showing the little value paid to human life throughout the mining regions in California, he quotes this brief paragraph from a mountain journal: "The Indians begin to be troublesome again in Trinity County. One man and a Chinaman have been killed, and a lady crippled for life."

A CLEVER Englishman, Mr. Charles Wentworth Dilke, has recently written a book of travels entitled "Greater Britain," which has been republished by Harper and Brothers. It contains here and there a neat anecdote, new, and

dressing a jury, and working up the evidence into a most fantastic shape that little agreed with the Chief Justice's notes, the latter arrested him in mid-career. "I can not permit you to go on in that line of argument, Mr. Choate; I find nothing in the evidence that warrants it."

worthy of reproduction in the Drawer. He men- | ally. On one occasion, while Choate was adtions having been told by a Southern planter that the only change he could see in the condition of the negroes since they have been free, is that formerly the supervision of the overseer forced them occasionally to be clean; whereas now nothing on earth can make them wash. He says that, writing lately to his agent, he received an answer to which there was the following postscript: "You ain't sent no sope. You had better send sope; niggers is certainly needing sope."

THE story goes that California boys, when asked if they believe in a future state, reply: "Guess so; California!"

THE Rev. Dr. Hawes, of Hartford, was a preacher of great power, and sometimes made personal applications of his text that made some of the brethren wince. "Many of the male members of this church," he used to say, "are very good Christians here in Hartford, but what are you when you go to New York?" As in Hartford, so, to some extent, in Washington. When the census-taker of the District of Columbia was making his official round he came to the house of a wealthy member from New England. The door was opened by a black boy, to whom the white man began:

What's your name?"

"Sambo, Sah, am my Christian name." "Well, Sambo, is your master a Christian ?" To which Sambo's indignant answer was, "No, Sah! mass' member ob Congress, Sah!"

RATHER practical people those who manage the little details connected with public worship at the Rev. Henry Ward Beecher's church. Up to a certain time the seats of pew-holders are reserved without question. After that strangers are treated with all the courtesy that time and occasion will. Now and then a presumptuous ass appears, and attempts to "travel" on his dignity; as was the case not long since, when a tall, thin-visaged gentleman, white-cravatted, presented himself, and proceeded to march into the house.

"You can't go in there," said Mr. Palmer, the veteran usher.

"But I am a clergyman."

"We have no particular need of your services to-night, Sir."

66

"Be not forgetful to entertain strangers," said the minister; you may entertain angels unawares."

I

"Very true," said Mr. Palmer. "I have seated persons in this house for twelve years. have seen all sorts of people. I am very certain if I should see an angel I should know him. You must bide your time and take your chance, Sir."

PROBABLY no more learned or upright Judge ever sat upon the bench of any court than the late Chief Justice Shaw of the Supreme Court of Massachusetts. Choate practiced a good deal before him. The two were, in most respectscertainly in mental characteristics-the opposites of each other. There was always a degree of empiricism in Choate's pleas and general management of his cases, and this was extremely obnoxious to the practical mind of the Chief Justice, who did not hesitate to snub him occasion

Choate stopped and looked at the Chief Justice for a moment with an expression of countenance that brought a smile upon every face, and then, turning round to his assistant in the case, said, in a subdued tone, but loud enough to be heard by the bar, "The Chief Justice don't know much about law, but he is a PERFECT gentleman" with his well-known emphasis upon perfect.

ANOTHER, of Webster. A certain ex-Judge and Mr. Webster were, at one time, on very intimate terms. At a particular time, during the changes of political relations contingent upon the breaking up of the Whig party, the Judge found it convenient, perhaps profitable, to court some other rising stars, in preference to the great constitutional luminary that had hitherto been the idol of his worship, and neglected to pay his devotions at the accustomed shrine. This was noticed by Mr. Webster, and, besides, some interested friends had advised him of the Judge's delinquency, while at the same time the Judge was warned by some of his friends that if he did not look out he would lose Mr. Webster's friendship altogether. This alarmed the Judge, and de termined him, after a coolness of several months, to renew, if he could, his old relations. So, one morning, he went up to Mr. Webster's office in Boston, which was then on the corner of Court and Tremont streets. The latter happened to be alone, pacing the room backward and forward, with his hands behind him, in one of his gloomy moods.

The Judge opened the door part way, and, looking in, addressed the great man in his soft and musical tones, which had, moreover, something of pleading in them:

"Good-morning, Mr. Webster." "Good-morning, Judge (with acidity, and considerable emphasis, not of the pleasant kind-still pacing backward and forward, without looking at the Judge).

"A fine morning, Mr. Webster," continued the Judge, still holding the door by the knob. "A ver-r-y fine mor-r-ning, Judge "Good-morning," replied the Judge, shortly, giving up the attempt and retiring slowly. "GOOD-MOR-R-NING, Judge

(with increased emphasis), when the Judge closed the door.

WE were remarking to a witty friend of ours, learned in the law, upon the confusion of a certain General, whose name need not be mentioned, during one of the battles of the war, and said he couldn't have known whether he was standing upon his head or his heels.

"Yes," he replied, "he was in the situation of a man who had a trustee process served upon him-he was puzzled to know whether he had sued somebody, or somebody had sued him."

WE are indebted to a friend at Yankee Hill, California, for the following particulars of the

the quality of the remainder sacrificed to a delusitory quantity.

"Frank," said he, "what is the matter with the milk?—it is half water."

"I dunno, General; I didn't put no water in it," said Frank. "Ask

"Some one did," said the General. Ben if he knows any thing about it."

In a few moments Frank returned, and, with a very grave face, said, "General, Ben says he didn't put any water in the milk, but he watered the cow just before milking her !"

SPEAKING of climate, we find in Ross Browne's last clever work, "The Apache Country," published by the Harpers, a sketch of the warm season of that region, which is in the best style of that humorous traveler:

The climate in winter is finer than that of Italy. It would scarcely be possible to suggest an improvement. I never experienced such exquisite Christmas weather as we enjoyed during our sojourn. Perhaps fastidious people might object to the temperature in summer, when the rays of the sun attain their maximum force, and the hot winds sweep in from the desert. It is said that a wicked soldier died here, and was consigned to the fiery regions below for his manifold sins; but unable to stand the rigors of the climate, sent back for his blankets. I have even heard comthe true heat, because the mercury dried up. plaint made that the thermometer failed to show Every thing dries: wagons dry, men dry, chickens dry; there is no juice left in any thing, living or dead, by the close of summer. and soldiers are supposed to walk about creaking; mules, it is said, can only bray at midnight; and I have heard it hinted that the carcasses of cattle rattle inside their hides, and that snakes find a difficulty in bending their bodies, and hornedfrogs die of apoplexy. Chickens hatched at this season, as old Fort Yumers say, come out of the shell ready cooked; bacon is eaten with a spoon ; and butter must stand an hour in the sun before the flies become dry enough for use. The In

Officers

dians sit in the river with fresh mud on their heads, and by dint of constant dipping and sprinkling manage to keep from roasting, though they usually come up parboiled. Strangers coming suddenly upon a group squatted in water up to their necks, with their mud-covered heads glistening in the sun, frequently mistake them for seals. Their usual mode of traveling down the river is astride of a log, their heads only being visible. It is enough to make a man stare with amazement to see a group of mud balls floating on the current of a hot day, laughing and talking to each other as if it were the finest fun in the

tion; have an idea it must be delightful in such a glowing summer climate.

DURING the Atlanta campaign one of our Gen-world. I have never tried this mode of locomoerals, being rather unwell, was fearful of a bilious attack, owing as he supposed to the too free use of coffee. The commissary procured him a cow, which yielded him a good-sized bowl of milk night and morning. Frank, his body-servant, and Ben, the cook, were responsible for the appearance of the milk on the table morning and evening. One evening, after a hard day's work, the General sat down to the table anticipating his usual refreshing repast of bread and milk, but upon tasting it thought it appeared to be diluted with water, and suspected surreptitious love had been made to part of the original, and

THE recent contest at Albany for the United States Senatorship caused the gathering at that capital of so numerous an assemblage of politicians that bed and board became matters of solicitude, and prices "ruled high." But Albany figures are cast in the shade by those demanded by keepers of public and private citizens during the recent Senatorial contest at Carson City, Nevada, where the rates charged for lodgings were, aocording to the Virginia Enterprise: "For a bed

in a house, barn, blacksmith's-shop, or hay-yard | have experienced a change, as I told my husband, (none to be had-all having been engaged short- Mr. Rogers, after I came home from meeting, ly before election), horse blanket in old sugar when I became convinced that I was the most hogshead per night, $10; crockery-crate, with sinful creature in the world, as I told my hus straw, $7 50; without straw, $5 75; for cellar- band, Mr. Rogers; and, says he, I think so too. door, $4; for roosting on a smooth pole, $3 50; I told Mr. Rogers, my husband, I was going to pole, common, rough, $3; plaza fence, $2 50; lead a different life; was going to trim my lamp, walking up and down the Warm Spring road, if and have it burning again the bridegroom come. cloudy, $1 50; if clear, $1 25; roosting places Then Mr. Rogers, my husband, said he didn't in pine-trees back of Camp Nye, 6 bits.' see what I wanted of another, but he didn't make no objection. Then I told Mr. Rogers, my husband, that I would join the church, and prepare myself for the place where the worm dieth not and the fire is not squenched; and my husband, Mr. Rogers, told me I'd better!"

In a late Western paper, under the heading, "Situations Wanted," appeared the following, which in a fair degree shows the versatility as well as the retiring character of the American printer:

WANTED-Situation by a Practical Printer, who is competent to take charge of any department in a printing and publishing house. Would accept a professorship in any of the academies. Has no objection to teach ornamental painting and penmanship, geometry, trigonometry, and many other sciences. Is particularly qualified to act as pastor of a small evangelical church, or as local preacher. Would have no objection to form a small but select class of young ladies, to instruct them in the higher branches. To a dentist or chiropodist he would be invaluable; or he would cheerfully accept a position as bass or tenor singer in a choir.

THE local editor of a very far West journal having attended a ball on the frontier, has felt moved, after the manner of the Jenkins of the metropolitan press, to furnish a report of some of the dresses worn by the more eminent persons present. Thus:

Miss A. was everlastingly scrumptious, in an underskirt of red calico, flounced with blue mousline, surmounted by an over-skirt of linsey looped in the rear en saddlebag, with yellow bows. Waist à la anarugeon, bosome de bustee. Hair in a chignon resembling half a cabbage. Extraordinarily hefty.

Mrs. B. wore a short skirt of home-made flannel, displaying in a very beatific manner her No. 11 moccasins. Corsage de Shoganosh, ornamented with soldier buttons. Hair en fricasce: perfume of cinnamon drops. Excessively highfalutin.

Madame C., a noted half-breed belle, attracted an all-fired sight of comment by appearing in a hoop skirt, ornamented with fox tails arranged en circumbendibus. Waist of yellow flannel slashed with stripes of buffalo hide. She carried a large sunflower, and danced with great lucenesse. Terrifically magnolious. Hon-ki-do-ri, chief of the Dirty Paws, was the lion of the evening. He wore a blanket de Mackinaw, with breeches de bouk-skine, terminating in shoe packs. Rooster feathers in his hair. His whole ensemble was very antagonistique.

Nit-che-check-shirt, a distinguished representative of a neighboring friendly tribe, fairly divided the honors of the evening with the first named chieftain. He wore his coat cut à la wammouse, hair plaited, blanket classically slung, breeches de tomihaque. Redolent with perfumerie de Chippewa.

Mich'l M'Mackarel, Esq., a festive importation from the "Ould Dart," was gorgeously resplendent in a red shirt and shillalah.

As a specimen of military dialogue how does this strike the reader? A soldier was going off the field too hastily, when the provost guard cried, "Halt!" "Can't." "Wounded?" "No." "Sick?" "No."

"What's the matter?"

"I'm scared, and want to go to the rear torally!"

THAT the schoolmaster when he next is "abroad" should visit a certain locality in "Bennsylvana" is, we think, conclusively proved by the following copy of a letter lately received by an agent from a school trustee :

MR. AOHENT,-Blase Scent our pooks son sune you
cane. W bay de frade. We scent sewende file
Thaler.
FRANZ HOMSMAN.
Fepruare 3 1869.

THE authorities of Council Bluffs, Iowa, are taking praiseworthy steps for the destruction of the gophers that infest that section of country. They offer twelve and a half cents for each one "kilt," provided that "the tails decapitated and presented for redemption." That ought to bring them.

A WISCONSIN Correspondent desires to perpetuate the smartness of a local preacher in his neighborhood, who is as sharp and shrewd at a bargain as he is prompt to attend to the spiritual requirements of those in affliction. He was recently called to attend a funeral, and on returning home remarked, with no small satisfaction, that he had "improved the time by making fifteen dollars in a wood trade while the mourners were viewing the corpse."

IN narrative the points always to be kept in FROM the same source this specimen of high view are clearness and succinctness. These re- commercial integrity. A merchant of that requirements seem, to a certain extent, to have gion being unable to live as comfortably as he been acted upon by a respectable old lady in Con- desired and at the same time pay his debts, failnecticut, who, in a revival there, was struck with ed several times in business, and made assignconviction, became a convert, and was proposed ments of his property. Not long since this merfor membership of the church. A meeting was chant-prince died. Among those who had cause held for examination of the candidates. The to remember him was Mr. B, who, meeting venerable examiner said: "Well, my dear sister one of his neighbors, was informed that Uncle Rogers, please relate your experience." Where- C was called, was dead-had paid the debt upon the good woman thus spoke: "Well, I of nature. don't know what to say, as I told my husband, "Is that so?" replied B-; "why in thunMr. Rogers, before I came here; but I believe I der didn't he make an assignment?"

NEW MONTHLY MAGAZINE.

No. CCXXVIII-MAY, 1869.-VOL. XXXVIII.

Entered according to Act of Congress, in the year 1869, by Harper and Brothers, in the Clerk's Office of the District Court of the United States, for the Southern District of New York.