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VI.

The L-d knows how our army'll fare,
We're govern'd by the L-d knows who;
Our King is gone the L-d knows where,
And the L-d knows what we shall do!"

As uncourtly persons are apt to be aukward in the use of such appellatives as the titles of Lord or Lordship, often inserting them too frequently in their addresses, they would do well to look into the 204th Number of the Tatler, where they will find some excellent rules laid down for their accommodation; and be taught to reserve such titles for dignified purposes only. They may talk of his Lordship's favour, his Lordship's judgment, his Lordship's patronage, &c., as much as they please, but not of his Lordship's wig, cane, hat; his Lordship's thumb, nose, elbow, or great toe! The paper is altogether very good one, and in more ways than one, applicable to the subject we have in hand.

I cannot dismiss this section without observing that hunch-backed, and crooked persons, have often the title of Lord conferred on them. The reason of this should be understood, lest we should fancy such deformities to be among the proper characteristics of nobility; which

might well happen, if looking to the hunchbacks, we were to adopt the French interpretation of the term Lordly, viz. one who carries himself high; "Qui se porte haut:" but the appellation, as applied to crooked persons, happens not to be, (what I doubt not most people imagine,) mere vulgar English, but pure Greek. Lordos (Aogdos) signifying in the latter tongue crooked or bent, curvus. If there be a punishment in our laws for scandalum magnatum, I think some reward is due to me for saving our Lords from such a reproach.

CAPTAIN.

I SHALL next offer a few remarks on the Title of " Captain," I think I have heard it called a travelling title, as being easily assumed, and giving some air of importance to whoever bears it. And certainly many do bear it, whose stations in the world are very different. There are Captains of Frigates, and Captains of Steampackets; Captains of the Navy and Captains of the Army. And in war-time we generally know them apart. But when the blue coats and red coats are laid aside, who can any longer be expected to distinguish them by their mere names or appearance? And yet there is this wide difference between them, a Captain in the army ranks below a Major, while the lowest Captain in the Navy (a master and commander for instance) has the rank of a Major in the Army ; a Post-Captain that of Lieutenant-Colonel; and after three years, that of a full Colonel. But this difference, under the same title, bears particularly hard upon the gentlemen of the navy ; from the circumstances of age. It must be something to have risen high in such active pro

fessions at an early age; it must be proportionally mortifying to bear the marks of age without promotion. Yet what ordinary person could guess, when he hears four individuals in company, each called " Captain," two perhaps

rather advanced in years, one in middle life, and one a smart dashing young man, that they were not all Captains in the same degree. How could he be brought to fancy, that the latter only (Captain D. for instance) was really a Captain, while Captain A. was a Colonel, Captain B. a Lieutenant-Colonel, and Captain C. a Major? Might he not blunder so far as to suppose the youngest man the best Captain of all, as having attained to that rank so early in life, while the latter had been standing still, or through want of merit, or want of interest, (which I am sorry to say, is want of merit in many people's eyes,) had missed of farther promotion? I have been in the way of feeling for persons in this situation? Where the young military Captain in his red coat, (being on full pay and on duty in peace time) and decorated with honors, for one or two campaigns, has drawn the attention of the whole company, while the much more experienced, but modest Naval Captain in his brown coat, scarcely at

tracted any notice at all. In the Courtly Registers of Levees and Drawing-Rooms, where in most instances particular attention is paid to order and rank, the common title of Captain includes under it the Officers of both services. Lieutenant is a title seldom used in company, otherwise what has been said of the naval and military Captain, would equally apply to the Lieutenants. The titles being the same, but the ranks different; a Lieutenant in the Navy having, in fact, the rank of a Captain in the Army.

In France, if I mistake not, these things are managed better; their Naval Officers having military titles, as well as military rank; their Admirals being Generals*, &c. :-It would seem preposterously absurd to associate a Colonel with a military Serjeant, but let the former be in company with a Serjeant at Law, and their rank would be equal; and yet one would be dis

* With regard, however, to their highest military title of all, Maréchal or Mareschal, there is a hazard of mistaking a General for a Farrier, the title or name being common to both, though as applied to one or the other, said to be differently derived. In the former case, from Mare, a Francic word, denoting great or honourable, and Scale, a servant; in the latter case from Mare, a horse, and the same word Scale.

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