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-ftopping as if the point wanted fettling ;-and betwixt the nominative cafe, which your lordship knows fhould govern the verb, he suspended his voice in the epilogue a dozen times, three fecondsand three fifths by a ftop-watch, my lord, each time.-Admirable grammarian!-But in fufpending his voice was the fense suspended likewife? did no expreffion of attitude or countenance fill up the chafm?-Was the eye filent? Did you narrowly look ?—I look'd only at the stopwatch, my lord.-Excellent observer.

AND what of this new book the whole world makes fuch a rout about?-Oh! 'tis out of all plumb, my lord,-quite an irregular thing! not one of the angles at the four corners was a right angle. I had my rule and compaffes, &c. my lord, in my pocket.-Excellent critic.

-And for the epic poem your lordship bid me look at;— upon taking the length, breadth, height, and depth of it, and trying them at home upon an exact scale of Boffu's 'tis out, my lord, in every one of its dimenfions.-Admirable connoiffeur.

AND did you ftep in, to take a look at the grand picture in your way back?-'Tis a melancholy daub ! my lord; not one principle of the pyramid in any one group !

and what a price! for there is nothing of the colouring of Titian-the expreffion of Rubens-the grace of Raphael the purity of Dominichino-the corregiescity of Corregio-the learning of Pouffin-the airs of Guido the taste of the Carrachi's or the grand contour of Angelo.

GRANT me patience, juft Heaven!-Of all the cants which are canted in this canting world-though the cant of hypocrites may be the worst-the cant of criticism is the moft tormenting!

I WOULD

I WOULD go fifty miles on foot, to kiss the hand of that man, whose generous heart will give up the reins of his imagination into his author's hands-be pleafed he knows not why, and cares not wherefore.

STERNE.

CHA P. IV.

ON NE GROE S.

WHEN Tom, an' please your honour, got to the shop,

there was nobody in it, but a poor negro girl, with a bunch of white feathers flightly tied to the end of a long cane, flapping away flies-not killing them.-'Tis a pretty picture! said my uncle Toby-she had suffered perfecution, Trim, and had learnt mercy—————

-SHE was good, an' please your honour, from nature as well as from hardships; and there are circumstances in the ftory of that poor friendless flut that would melt a heart of ftone, faid Trim; and fome difmal winter's evening, when your honour is in the humour, they shall be told you with the rest of Tom's story, for it makes a part of it

THEN do not forget, Trim, faid uncle Toby.

A NEGRO has a foul, an' please your honour, faid the corporal (doubtingly.)

I AM not much verfed, corporal, quoth my uncle Toby, in things of that kind; but I fuppofe, God would not leave him without one, any more than thee or me.

-IT would be putting one fadly over the head of another, quoth the corporal.

It would fo; faid my uncle Toby. Why then, an' please your honour, is a black wench to be used worse than a white one?

1 CAN give no reason, faid my uncle Toby-ONLY, cried the corporal, shaking his head, because she has no one to stand up for her

'Tis that very thing, Trim, quoth my uncle Toby, which recommends her to protection, and her brethren with her ;-'tis the fortune of war which has put the whip into our hands now where it may be hereafter, Heaven knows !— but be it where it will, the brave, Trim, will not use it unkindly.

GOD forbid, faid the corporal.

AMEN, refponded my uncle Toby, laying his hand upon his heart.

CHA P. V.

STERNE

RIVERS AND SIR HARRY.

SIR HAR.

COLO

OLONEL, you moft obedient: I am come upon the old bufinefs; for unlefs I am allowed to entertain hopes of Miss Rivers, I shall be the most miferable of all human beings.

Riv. Sir Harry, I have already told you by letter, and I now tell you personally, I cannot listen to your proposals. SIR HAR. No, Sir?

Riv. No, Sir, I have promised my daughter to Mr. Sidney; do you know that, Sir?

SIR HAR. Ido; but what then! Engagements of this kind, you know

Riv. So then, you do know I have promised her to Mr. Sidney?

SIR HAR. I do ; but I alfo know that matters are not finally fettled between Mr. Sidney and you; and I moreover

know,

know, that his fortune is by no means equal to mine, there. fore

RIV. Sir Harry, let me ask you one queftion before you make your confequence.

SIR HAR. A thousand if you please, Sir.

RIV. Why then, Sir, let me ask you, what you have ever obferved in me or my conduct, that you defire me fo familiarly to break my word? I thought, Sir, you confidered me as a man of honour.

SIR HAR. And fo I do, Sir, a man of the niceft ho

nour.

Riv. And yet, Sir, you ask me to violate the fanctity of my word; and tell me directly, that it is my interest to be a rafcal.

SIR HAR. 1 really don't understand you, Colonel : I thought when I was talking to you, I was talking to a man who knew the world; and as you have not yet figned

fo

RIV. Why, this is mending matters with a witness! And

you think because I am not legally bound, I am under no neceffity of keeping my word! Sir Harry, laws were never made for men of honour; they want no bond but the rectitude of their own fentiments, and laws are of no use but to bind the villains of fociety.

SIR HAR. Well! but my dear Colonel, if you have no regard for me, fhew fome little regard for your daughter.

RIV. I fhew the greatest regard for my daughter, by giving her to a man of honour and I must not be infulted with any farther repetition of your proposals.

SIR HAR. Infult you, Colonel? Is the offer of my alliance an infult? Is my readinefs to make what fettlements think proper

you

Riv. Sir Harry, I should confider the offer of a kingdom an infult if it was to be purchased by the violation of my word: Befides, though my daughter shall never go a beggar to the arms of her husband, I would rather fee her happy than rich; and if fhe has enough to provide handsomely for a young family, and something to spare for the exigences of a worthy friend, I fhall think her as affluent as if she was mistress of Mexico.

SIR HAR. Well, Colonel, I have done; but I believe— Riv. Well, Sir Harry, and as our conference is done, we will, if you please, retire to the ladies: I fhall be always glad of your acquaintance, though I cannot receive you as a fon-in-law; for a union of interests I look upon as a union of dishonour, and confider a marriage for money, at best, but a legal proftitution.

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STERL. W

HAT are your commands with me, Sir
John?

SIR JOHN. After having carried the negociation between our families to fo great a length, after having affented fo readily to all your propofals, as well as received so many inftances of your cheerful compliance with the demands made on our part, I am extremely concerned, Mr. Sterling, to be the involuntary caufe of any uneafinefs.

STERL. Uneafinefs! what uneafinefs? Where bufinefs is tranfacted as it ought to be, and the parties understand one another, there can be no uneafinefs. You agree, on fuch and fuch conditions, to receive my daughter for a wife on the fame conditions I agree to receive you as a fon-in-law ; ànd

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