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COMEDY OF ERRORS.
PERSONS REPRESENTED. Solinus, duke of Ephesus.
A merchant, friend to Antipholus of Syracuse.
Pinch, a schoolmaster, and a conjurer.
Luciana, her sister. Dromio of Ephesus,
twin brothers, and atten-Luce, her servant. Dromio of Syracuse,
dants on the two Anti- A courtezan.
pholus's. Balthazar, a merchant.
Gaoler, officers, and other attendants. Angelo, a goldsmith.
Unto a woman, happy but for me,
And by me too, had not our hap been bad. SCENE I.A hall in the Duke's Palace. Enler With her I liv'd in joy; our wealth increasid,
Duke, Ægeon, Gaoler, officer, and other altend. By prosperous voyages I onen made ants.
To Epidamnum, till my factor's death ;
And he (great care of goods at random left)
Drew me from kind embracements of my spouse
From whoin my absence was not six months old,
Had made provision for her following me,
And soon, and safe, arrived where I was.
There she had not been long, but she became
Of such a burden, male twins, both alike : "Twixt thy seditious countrymen and us,
Those, for their parents were exceeding poor It hath in solemn synods been decreed,
I bought, and brought up to attend my sons. Both by the Syracusans and ourselves,
My wife, not meanly proud of two such boys, To admit no traffic to our adverse towns : Made daily motions for our home return: Nay, more,
Unwilling 'I agreed ; alas, too soon. If any, born at Ephesus, be seen
We came aboard : At any Syraeusan marts? and fairs ;
A league from Epidamnum had we sail'd, Again, if any Syracusan born
Before the always-wind-obeying deep Come to the bay of Ephesus, he dies,
Gave any tragic instance of our harm: His goods confiscate to the duke's dispose : But longer did we not retain much hope; Unless a thousand marks be levied,
For what obscured light the heavens did grant To quit the penalty, and to ransom him.
Did but convey unto our fearful minds Thy substance, valued at the highest rate, A doubtful warrant of immediate death; Cannot amount unto a hundred marks ;
Which, though myself would gladly have embrac'd,
And piteous plainings of the pretty babes,
Duke. Well, Syracusan, say, in bries, the cause Fored me to seek delays for them and me.
My wife, more careful for the latter born, Than I to speak my griess unspeakable : Had fasten'd him unto a small spare mast, Yet, that the world may witness, that my end Such as sea-faring men provide for storms, Was wrought by nature,y not by vile offence, To him one of the other twins was bound, I'll utter what my sorrow gives me leave.
Whilst I had been like heedful of the other. In Syracusa was I born; and wed
The children thus dispos'd, my wife and I, (1) Name of a coin. (2) Markets.
(3) Natural affection.
Pixing our eyes on whom our care was fix'd, Try all the friends thou hast in Ephesus ;
Gaol. I will, my lord.
Æge. Hopeless, and helpless, doth Ægeon wend," And, by the benefit of his wish'd light,
But lo procrastinate his lifeless end. (Exeuni. The seas wax'd calm, and we discovered Two ships from far making amain to us,
SCENE II.A public place. Enter Antipholus or Corinth that, of Epidaurus this :
and Dromio of Syracuse, and a Merchant. But ere they came,-0, let me say no more! Mer. Therefore, give out you are of Epidamnum, Gather the sequel by that went before.
Lest that your goods too soon be confiscate.
Is apprehended for arrival here;
Æge. O, had the gods done so, I had not now According to the statute of the town,
Dies ere the weary sun set in the west.
Ant. S. Go bear it to the Centaur, * where we host, Which being violently borne upon,
And stay there, Dromio, till I come to thee.
Till that, I'll view the manners of the town,
Peruse the traders, gaze upon the buildings, What to delight in, what to sorrow for.
And then return, and sleep within mine inn; Her part, poor soul! seeming as burdened For with long travel I am stiff and weary. With lesser weight, but not with lesser wo,
Get thee away. Was carried with more speed before the wind; Dro. S. Many a man would take you at your And in our sight they three were taken up
word, By fishermen of Corinth, as we thought,
And go indeed, having so good a mcan. Ai length, another ship had seized on us ;
(Erit Dro. S. And, knowing whom it was their hap to save, Ant. S. A trusty villain, sir ; that very oft, Gave helpful welcome to their shipwreck'd guests ; When I am dull with care and melancholy, And would have reft' the fishers of their prey, Lightens my humour with his merry jests. Had not their bark been very slow of sail, What will you walk with me about the town, And therefore homeward did they bend their course. And then go to my inn, and dine with me? Thus have you heard me sever'd from my bliss; Mer. I am invited, sir, to certain merchants, That by misfortunes was my life prolong'd, or whom I hope to make much benefit; To tell sad stories of my own mishaps.
I crave your pardon. Soon, at five o'clock, Duke. And, for the sake of them thou sorrowest Please you, I'll meet with you upon the mart, for,
And afterwards consort you till bed-time; Do me the favour to dilate at full
My present business calls me from you now.
Æge. My youngest boy, and yet my eldest care, And wander up and down, to view the city.
Mer. Sir, I commend you to your own content. After his brother; and importun'd me,,
[Erit Merchant. That his attendant, (for his case was like,
Ant. S. He that commends me to mine own Refl of his brother, but retain'd his name,)
content, Might bear him company in the quest of him : Commends me to the thing I cannot get. Whom whilst I labour'd of a love to see,
I to the world am like a drop of water,
That in the ocean seeks another drop;
Enter Dromio of Ephesus.
Here comes the almanac of my true date, Could all my travels warrant me they live. What now? How chance, thou art return'd so soon? Duke. Hapless Ægeon, whom the fates have Dro. E. Return'd so soon! rather approach'd mark'd
too late : To bear the extremity of dire mishap!
The capon burns, the pig falls from the spit ; Now, trust me, were it not against our laws, The clock hath strucken twelve upon the beli, Against my crown, my oath, my dignity, My mistress made it one upon my cheek: Which princes, would they, may not disannul, She is so hot because the meat is cold; My soul should sue an advocate for thee,
The meat is cold, because you come not home; But, though thou art adjudged to the death, You come not home, because you have no stomach; And passed sentence may not be recallid, You have no stomach, having broke your fast; But to our honour's great disparagement, But we, that know what 'tis to fast and pray, Yet will I favour thee in what I can:
Are penitent for your default to-day. Therefore, merchant, I'll limit thee this day,
Ant. S. Stop in your wind, sir; tell me this, I To seek thy help by beneficial help:
Where have you left the money that I gave you? (1) Deprived. Clear, completely (3) Go.
The sign of their hotel. |(5) i. e. Servant. (6) Exchange, market-place.
Dro. E. 0,-six-pence, that I had o' WednesdayLuc. Perhaps, some merchant hath invited him, last,
And from the mart he's somewhere gone to dinner. To pay the saddler for my mistress' crupper ; Good sister, let us dine, and never fret: The saddler had it, sir, I kept it not.
A man is master of his liberty: Ant. S. I am not in a sportive humour now : Time is their master; and, when they see time, Tell me, and dally not, where is the money? They'll go, or come: If so, be patieni, sister. We being strangers here, how dar'st thou trust Aur. Why should their liberty than ours be more? So great a charge from thine own custody? Luc. Because their business still lies out o'door.
Dro. E. I pray you, jest, sir, as you sit at dinner: Adr. Look, when I serve him so, he takes it ill. I from my mistress come to you in post;
Luc. 0, know, he is the bridle of your will. If I return, I shall be post indeed :
Adr. There's none, but asses, will be bridled so. For she will score your fault upon my pate. Luc. Why, headstrong liberty is lash'd with wo. Methinks, your maw, like mine, should be your There's nothing, situate under heaven's eye, clock,
But hatl, his bound, in earth, in sea, in sky: and strike you home without a messenger. The beasts, the fishes, and the winged fowls, Ant. S. Come, Dromio, come, these jests are Are their males' subjects, and at their controls. out of season;
Men, more divine, and masters of all these, Reserve them till a merrier hour than this : Lords of the wide world, and wild watry seas, Where is the gold I gave in charge to thee? Indued with intellectual sense and souls,
Dro. E. To me, sir ? why you gave no gold to me. Or more pre-eminence than fish and fowls, Ant. S. Come on, sir knave, have done your Are masters to their females, and their lords : foolishness,
Then let your will attend on their accords. And tell me, how thou hast dispos'd thy charge. Adr. This servitude makes you to keep unwed. Dro. E. My charge was but to setch you from Luc. Not this, but troubles of the marriage bed. the mart
Adr. But, were you wedded, you would bear Home to your house, the Phænis, sir, to dinner;
some sway: My mistress, and her sister, stay for you.
Luc. Ere I learn love, I'll practise to obey. Ant. S. Now, as I am a Christian, answer me, Aur. How is your husband start some otherIn what safe place you have bestow'd my money;
where? Or I shall break that merry sconce' of yours,
Luc. Till he come home again, I would forbear. That stands on tricks when I am undispos'd: Adr. Patience unmov'd, no marvel though she Where is the thousand marks thou hadst of me?
pause; Dro. E. I have some marks of yours upon my They can be meek, that have no other cause. pate,
A wretched soul, bruis'd with adversity, Some of my mistress' marks upon my shoulders, We bid be quiet, when we hear it cry; But not a thousand marks between you both. But were we burthen'd with like weight of pain, If I should pay your worship those again, As much, or more, we should ourselves complain : Perchance, you will not bear them patiently. So thou, that hast no unkind mate to gricve ihee, Ant. S. 'Thy mistress marks! what mistress, With urging helpless patience would'st relieve me: slave, hast thou ?
But, if thou live to see like right beren, Dro. E. Your worship's wife, my mistress at This fool-beggd patience in thee will be left. the Phoenix;
Luc. Well, I will marry one day, but to tryShe that doth fast, till you come home to dinner, Here comes your man, now is your husband nigh. And prays, that you will hic you home to dinner. Anl. S. What, wilt thou flout me thus unto my
Enter Dromio of Ephesus. face,
Adr. Say, is your tardy master now at hand ? Being forbid? There, take you that, sir knave. Dro. E. Nay, he is at two hands with me, and Dro. E. What mean you, sir ? for God's sake, that my two ears can witness. hold your hands;
Adr. Say, didst thou speak with him ? know'st Nay, an you will not, sir, I'll take my heels.
thou his mind?
[Exit Dromio E. Dro. E. Ay, ay, he told his mind upon mine ear: Ant. S. Upou my life, by some device or other, Beshrew his hand, I scarce could understand it. The villain is o'er-raughtof all my money.
Luc. Spake he so doubtfully, thou couldst not They say, this town is full of cozenage;
feel his meaning? As, nimble jugglers, that deceive the eye,
Dro. E. Nay, he struck so plainly, I could too Dark-working sorcerers, that change the mind, well feel his blows; and withal so doubtfully, that Soul-killing witches, that deform the body; I could scarce understand them.' Disguised cheaters, prating mountebanks,
Idr. But say, I pr’ythee, is he coming home ? And many such like liberties of sin:
It seems, he hath great care to please his wise. Is it prove so, I will be gone the sooner.
Dro. E. Why, mistress, sure my master is hornI'll to the Centaur, to go seek this slave;
mad. I greatly fear, my money is not safe. (Exit. Adr. Horn-mad, thou villain ?
Dro. E. I mean not cuckold-mad; but, sure,
he's stark mad:
When I desir'd him to come home to dinner,
He ask'd me for a thousand marks in gold :
| Tis dinner-lime, quoth I ; My gold, quoth he: SCENE I.A public place. Enter Adriana, Your meat doth burn, quoth I; My gold, quoth he: and Luciana.
Will you come home ? quoth I; My gold, quoth he: Adr. Neither my husband, nor the slave return'd, Where is the thousand marks I gave thee, rillain? That in such haste I sent to seek his master! The pig, quoth I, is burn'd; My gold, quoth he: Sure, Luciana, it is two o'clock.
My mistress, sir, quoth I; Hang up thy mistress ; (1) Head. (2) Over-reached.
-3) i. e. Scarce stand under them.
I know not thy mistress ; out on thy mistress ! Your mistress sent to have me home to dinner? Luc. Quoth who?
My house was at the Phænix ? Wast thou mad, Dro. E. Quoth my master :
That thus so madly thou didst answer me ? I know, quoth he, no house, no wife, no mistress ; Dro. S. What answer, sir ? when spake I such So that my errand, due unto my tongue,
a word ? I thank him, I bear home upon my shoulders ; Ant. S. Even now, even here, not half an hour For, in conclusion, he did beat me there.
since. Adr. Go back again, thou slave, and fetch him Dro. S. I did not see you since you sent me home.
hence, Dro. E. Go back again, and be new beaten Home to the Centaur, with the gold you gave me. home?
Ant. S. Villain, thou didst deny the gold's reFor God's sake, send some other messenger,
ceipt ; Adr: Back, slave, or I will break thy pate across. And told'st me of a mistress and a dinner ; Dro. E. And he will bless that cross with other For which, I hope, thou felt'st I was displeas'd. beating :
Dro. S. 'I am glad to see you in this merry vein: Between you, I shall have a holy head.
What means this jest ? I pray you, master, tell me. Adr. Hence, prating peasant; fetch thy master Ant. S. Yea, dost thou jeer, and fout me in the home.
teeth 1 Dro. E. Am I so round with you, as you with me, Think'st thou, I jest ? Hold, take thou that, and That like a football you do spurn me thus ?
(Beating him. You spurn me hence, and he will spurn me hither: Dro. S. Hold, sir, for God's sake: now your If I last in this service, you must case me in leather. jest is earnest :
(Exit. Upon what bargain do you give it me? Lau. Fie, how impatience low'reth in your face! "Ant. S. Because that I familiarly sometimes Adr. His company must do his minions grace, Do use you for my fool, and chat with you, Whilst I at home starve for a merry look. Your sauciness will jest upon my love, Hath homely age the alluring beauty took And make a common of my serious hours." From my poor cheek? then he hath wasted it: When the sun shines, let foolish gnats make sport, Are my discourses dull ? barren my wit ? But creep in crannies, when he hides his beams. If voluble and sharp discourse be marr'd,
If you will jest with me, know my aspect, Unkindness blunts it, more than marble hard. And fashion your demeanour to my looks, Do their gay vestments his affections bait ? Or I will beat this method in your sconce. That's not my fault, he's master of my state : Dro. S. Sconce, call you it'? so you would leave What ruins are in me that can be found
battering, I had rather have it a head : an you By him not ruin'd ? then is he the ground use these blows long, I must get a sconce for my of my defeatures :' My decayed láir?
head, and insconce' it too; or else I shall seek my A sunny look of his would soon repair : wit in my shoulders. But, I pray, sir, why am ? But, too unruly deer, he breaks the pale,
beaten? And feeds from home; poor I am but his stale.: Ant. S. Dost thou not know?
Luc. Self-arming jealousy!—fie, beat it hence. Dro. S. Nothing, sir ; but that I am beaten. Adr. Unfeeling tools can with such wrongs dis Ant. S. Shall I tell you why? pense.
Dro. S. Ay, sir, and wherefore ; for, they say, I know his eye doth homage otherwhere; every why hath a wherefore. Or else, what lets it but he would be here ? Ant. S. Why, first, --for flouting me; and then, Sister, you know he promis'd me a chain ;
wherefore, Would that alone, alone he would detain, For urging it the second time to me. So he would keep fair quarter with his bed ! Dro. S. Was there ever any man thus beater I see, the jewel, best enamelled,
out of season, Will lose his beauty ; and though gold 'bides still, When, in the why, and the wherefore, is neither That others touch, yet often touching will
rhyme nor reason ?Wear gold : and so no man, that hath a name,
Well, sir, I thank you. But falsehood and corruption doth it shame. Ant. S. Thank me, sir? for what? Since that my beauty cannot please his eye, Dro. S. Marry, sir, for this something that you I'll weep what's left away, and weeping die. gave me for nothing. Luc. How many fond fools serve mad jealousy! Ant. S. I'll make you amends next, to give you
(Exeunt. nothing for something. But say, sir, is it dinnerSCENE II.-The same. Enter Anti; holus of
Dro. S. No, sir; I think, the meat wants that I
have. Anl. S. The gold, I gave to Dromio, is laid up
Ant. S. In good time, sir, what's that?
Ant. S. Well, sir, then 'twill be dry.
Dro. S. If it be, sir, I pray you eat none of it. I could not speak with Dromio, since at first Ant. S. Your reason? I sent him from the mart: See, here he comes. Dro. S. Lest it make you choleric, and purchase Enter Dromio of Syracuse.
me another dry basting.
Ant. S. Well, sir, learn to jest in good time; How now, sir ? is your merry humour alter'd ? There's a time for all things. As you love strokes, so jest with me again. Dro. S. I durst have denied that, before yer You know no Centaur ? you receiv'd no gold? were so choleric.
Ant. S. By what rule, sir ? (1) Alteration of features. (2) Fair, for fairness. (3) Stalking-horse.
(6) Study my countenance. (5) i. e. Intrude on them when you please.
(7) A sconce was a fortification.
Dro. S. Marry, sir, by a rule as plan the And tear the stain'd skin off my harlot brow, plain bald pate of father 'Time himself.
And from my false hand cut the wedding ring, Ant, S. Let's hear it.
And break ii with a deep divorcing vow? Dro. s. There's no time for a man to recorer I know thou canst ; and therefore, see, thou do it. his hair, that grows bald by nature.
I am possess'd with an adulterate blot; Ant. 's. May he not do it by fine and recovery? My blood is mingled with the crime of lust:
Dro. S. Yes, to pay a fine for a peruke, and re- For, if we two be one, and thou play false, cover the lost hair of another man.
I do digest the poison of thy flesh, Ant. S. Why is time such a niggard of hair, Being strumpeted by thy contagion. being, as it is, so plentiful an excrement ? Keep then fair league and truce with thy true bed,
Dro. S. Because it is a blessing that he bestows I live dis-stain'd, thou undishonoured. on beasts: and what he hath scanted men in hair, Ant. S. Plead you to me, fair dame? I know he hath given them in wit.
you not: Ant. S. Why, but there's many a man hath more In Ephesus I am but two hours old, hair than wit.
As strange unto your town, as to your talk; Dro. S. Not a man of those, but he hath the wit Who, every word by all my wit being scannid, to lose his hair.
Wani wit in all one word to understand. Ant. S. Why, thou didst conclude hairy men Luc. Fie, brother! how the world is chang'd plain dealers without wit.
with you! Dro. S. The plainer dealer, the sooner lost: Yet When were you wont to use my sister thus? he loseth it in a kind of jollity.
She sent for you by Dromio home to dinner. Ani, S. For what reason
Ant. S. By Dromio ? Dro. $. For two; and sound ones too.
Dro. S. By me? Ant. S. Nay, not sound, I pray you.
Adr. By thee: and thus triou did'st return from Dro. S. Sure ones then.
him,Ani. S. Nay, not sure, in a thing falsing. That he did buffet thee, and, in his blows, Dro. S. Certain ones then.
Deny'd my house for his, me for his wife. Ant. S. Name them.
Ant. S. Did you converse, sir, with this gentleDro. S. The one, to save the money that he woman? spends in tiring; the other, that at dinner they What is the course and drift of your compact? should not drop in his porridge.
Dro. S. I, sir? I never saw her till this time. Ant. S. You would all this time have proved Ant. S. Villain, thou liest ; for even her very there is no time for all things.
words Dro. S. Marry, and did, sir ; namely, no time Didst thou deliver to me on the mart. to recover hair lost by nature.
Dro. S. I never spake with her in all my life. Ant. S. But your reason was not substantial, Ant. S. How can she thus then call us by ou why there is no time to recover.
names, Dro. S. Thus I mend it: Time himself is bald, Unless it be by inspiration ? and therefore, to the world's end, will have bald Adr. How ill agrees it with your gravity, followers.
To counterfeit thus grossly with your slave, Ant. S. I knew, 'twould be a bald conclusion: Abetting him to thwart nie in my mood ! But sost! who waits' us yonder ?
Be it my wrong, you are from me esempt,
But wrong not that wrong with a more contempt. Enter Adriana and Luciana.
Come, I will fasten on this sleeve of thine: Adr. Ay, ay, Antipholus, look strange, and Thou art an elm, my husband, I a vine ; frown;
Whose weakness, married to thy stronger state, Some other mistress hath thy sweet aspects,
Makes me with thy strength to communicate: I am not Adriana, nor thy wise.
If aught possess thee from me, it is dross, The time was once, when thou unurg'd would'st Usurping ivy, briar, or idle? moss; vow,
Who, all for want of pruving, with intrusion That never words were music to thine ear,
Infect thy sap, and live on thy confusion. That never object pleasing in thine eye,
Ant. $. To me she speaks; she moves me for That never touch well-welcome to thy hand,
her theme: That never meat sweet-savour'd in thy taste,
What, was I married to her in my dream? Unless 'I spake, look'd, touch'd, or carrd to thee. Or sleep I now, and think I hear all this? How comes it now, my husband, oh, how comes it, What error drives our eyes and ears amiss ? That thou art then estranged from thyself?
Until I know this sure uncertainty, Thyself I call it, being strange to me,
I'll entertain the offer'd fullacy. That, undividable, incorporate,
Luc. Dromio, go bid the servants spread for Am better than thy dear sell's better part
dinner. Ah, do not tear away thyself from me;
Dro. S. O, for my beads! I cross me for a sinner. For know, my love, as easy may'st thou fall
This is the fairy land ;--1), spite of spites ! A drop of water in the breaking gull,
We talk with goblins, owls, and elvish sprites; And lake unrningled thence that drop again,
If we obey them not, this will ensue, Without addition, or diminishing,
They'll suck our brealli
, on p.nch us black and blue. As take from me thyself, and not me too.
Lúc. Why prat'st thou to thysell, and answer'st How dearly would it touch thee to the quick,
not? Should'st thou but hear I were licentious;
Dromio, thou drone, thou snail, thou slug, thou sol! And that this body, consecrate to thee,
Dro. 'S. I am transform’d, master, am not I ? By ruffian lust should be contaminate!
Ant. S. I think, thou art, in mind, and so am l. Would'st thou not spit at me, and spurn at me,
Dro. S. Nay, master, both in mind, and in my And burl the name of husband in my face,
Ant. S. Thou hast thine own form.
No, I am an ape.