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Luc. Ir thou art chang'd to aught, 'tis to an ass. Bal. Small cheer, and great welcome, makes a Dro. S. 'Tis true; she rides me, and I long for merry feast. grass.
Ant. E. Ay, lo a niggardly host, and more "Tis so, I am an ass ; else it could never be,
sparing guest: But I should know her as well as she knows me. But though my cates, be mean, take them in good Adr. Come, come, no longer will I be a fool,
part; To put the finger in the eye and weep,
Better cheer may you have, but not with better Whilst man, and master, laugh my woes to scorn.
heart. Come, sir, to dinner; Dromio, keep the gate : But, soft; my door is lock'd; Go bid them let us in. Husband, I'll dine above with you to-day,
Dro. E. Maud, Bridget, Marian, Cicely, GilAnd shriver you of a thousand idle pranks :
lian, Jen'! Sirrah, if any ask you for your master,
Dro. S. ('Within.) Mome, malt-horse, capon, Say, he dines forth, and let no creature enter.
coxcomb, idiot, patch !! Come, sister :-Dromio, play the porter well. Either get thee from the door, or sit down at the Ani. s. Am I in earth, in heaven, or in hell?
hatch: Sleeping, or waking ? mad, or well-advis'd ? Dost thou conjure for wenches, that thou call'st for Known unto these, and to myself disguis'd!
such store, I'll say as they say, and persever so,
When one is one too many ? Go, get thee from the And in this mist at all adventures go.
door. Dro. S. Master, shall I be porter at the gate ? Dro. E. What patch is made our porter? My Adr. Ay; and let none enter, lest I break your master stays in the street. pate.
Dro. S. Let him walk from whence he came, Luc. Come, come, Antipholus, we dine too late. lest he catch cold on's feet.
(Exeunt. Anl. E. Who talks within there ? ho, open the
door. Dro. S. Right, sir, I'll tell you when, an you'll
tell me wherefore. ACT III.
Ant. E. Wherefore? for my dinner ; I have not
din'd to-day. SCENE 1.- The same. Enter Antipholus of Dro. S. Nor to-day here you must not; come Ephesus, Dromio of Ephesus, Angelo, and Bal
again, when you may.. thazar.
Ant. E. What art thou, that keep'st me out from Ant. E. Good signior Angelo, you must excuse
the house I owe 16 us all;
Dro. S. The porter for this time, sir, and my My wife is shrewish, when I keep not hours:
name is Dromio. Say, that I linger'd with you at your shop,
Dro. E. O villain, thou hast stolen both mine ofTo see the making of her carkanet,
fice and my name; And that to-morrow you will bring it home. The one ne'er got me credit, the other mickle But here's a villain, that would face me down
blame. He met me on the mart; and that I beat him,
Ir thou had'st been Dromio to-day in my place, And charg'd him with a thousand marks in gold;
Thou would'st have chang'd thy face for a name, And that I did deny my wife and house :
or thy name for an ass. Thou drunkard, thou, what didst thou mean by Luce. (Within.) What a coil' is there ? Dromio, this!
who are those at the gate ? Dro. E. Say what you will, sir, but I know what Dro. E. Let my master in, Luce. I know:
Faith, no; he comes too late ; That you beat me at the mart, I have your hand to And so tell your master. show:
O Lord, I must laugh:If the skin were parchment, and the blows you Have at you with a proverb.--Shall I set in my gave were ink,
staff? Your own hand-writing would tell you what I think. Luce. Have at you with another : that's,–When? Ant. E. I think, thou art an ass.
can you tell ? Dro. E. Marry, so it doth appear
Dro. S. Ilthy name be call'd Luce, Luce, thou By the wrongs I suffer, and the blows I bear.
hast answer'd him well. I should kick, being kick'd; and, being at that pass,
Ant. E. Do you hear, you minion ? you'll let us You would keep from my heels, and beware of an
in, I hope ?
Luce. I thought to have ask'd you. Ant. E. You are sad, signior Balthazar: 'Pray
And you said, no. God, our cheer
Dro. E. So, come, help ; well struck ; there May answer my good will, and your good welcome was blow for blow. here.
In!. E. Thou baggage, let me in. Bal. I hold your dainties cheap, sir, and your
Can you tell for whose sake ? welcome dear.
Dro. E. Master, knock the door hard. Ant. E. O, signior Balthazar, either at nesh or
Let him knock till it ache. fish,
Ant. E. You'll cry for this, minion, if I beat the A table full of welcome makes scarce one dainty
door down. dish.
Luce. What needs all that, and a pair of stocks
in the town? Bal. Good meat, sir, is common; that every churl affords.
Adr. [Wilhin.) Who is that at the door, that Ant. E. And welcome more common; for that's
keeps all this noise ? nothing but words.
Dro. S. By my troth, your town is troubled with
unruly boys. (1) Absolve. (2) A necklace strung with pearls. (3) Dishes of meat. (4) Blockhead. (5) Fool. (6) I own, am owner of. (7) Bustle, tumult.
Ant. E. Are you there, wife ? you might have Pretty and witty; wild, and, yet too, gentle ; come before.
There will we dine: this woman that I mean, Adr. Your wife, sir knave ? go, get you from My wife (but, I protest, without desert,) the door.
Hath oftentimes upbraided me withal ; Dro. E. If you went in pain, master, this knave To her will we to dinner.-Get you home, would go sore.
And fetch the chain; by this, I know, 'uis made : Ang. Here is neither cheer, sir, nor welcome ; Bring it, I pray you, to the Porcupine, we would fain have either.
For there's the house ; that chain will I bestow Bal. In debating which was best, we shall part (Be it for nothing but to spite my wife, with neither.
Upon mine hostess there : good sir, make haste : Dro. E. They stand at the door, master; bid Since mine own doors refuse to entertain me, them welcome hither.
I'll knock elsewhere, to see if they'll disdain me. Ant. E. There is something in the wind, that we Ang. I'll meet you at that place, some hour cannot get in.
hence. Dro. E. You would say so, master, if your Ant. E. Do so: This jest shall cost me some garments were thin.
(Eseunt. Your cake here is warm within ; you stand here in the cold :
SCENE II.—The same. Enter Luciana, and It would make a man mad as a buck, to be so
Antipholus of Syracuse. bought and sold. Ant. E. Go, fetch me something, I'll break ope Luc. And may it be that you have quite forgot the gate.
A husband's office ? Shall, Antipholus, hate, Dro. S. Break any breaking here, and I'll break Even in the spring of love, thy love-springs rot? your knave's pate.
Shall love, in building, grow so ruínate ? Dro. E. A man may break a word with you, If you did wed my sister for her wealth, sir : and words are but wind ;,
Then, for her wealth's sake, use her with more Ay, and break it in your face, so he'break it not kindness : behind.
Or, if you like elsewhere, do it by stealth ; Dro. S. It seems, thou wantest breaking : Out Muse your false love with some show of blindupon thee, hind!
ness : Dro. E. Here's too much, out upon thee! I Let not my sister read it in your eye; pray thee, let me in.
Be not thy tongue thy own shame's orator; Dro. S. Ay, when fowls have no feathers, and Look sweet, speak fair, become disloyalty; fish have no fin.
Apparel vice like virtue's harbinger: Ant. E. Well, I'll break in ; Go borrow me a Bear a fair presence, though your heart be tainted;
Teach sin the carriage of a holy saint; Dro. E. A crow without a feather ; master, Be secret-false : What need she be acquainted ? mean you so ?
What simple thief brags of his own attaint ? for a fish without a fin, there's a fowl without a 'Tis double wrong, to truant with your bed, feather:
And let her read it in thy looks at board: If a crow help us in, sirrah, we'll pluck a crow Shame hath a bastard fame, well managed ; together.
Ill deeds are doubled with an evil word. Ant. E. Go, get thee gone, fetch me an iron Alas, poor women! make us but believe,
Being compact of credit, that you love us; Bal. Have patience, sir ; 0, let it not be so; Though others have the arm, show us the sleeve; Herein you war against your reputation,
We in your motion turn, and you may move us. And draw within the compass of suspect Then, gentle brother, get you in again ;' The unviolated honour of your wife.
Comfort my sister, cheer her, call her wife : Once this,-Your long experience of her wisdom, "Tis holy sport to be a little vain,' Her sober virtue, years, and modesty,
When the sweet breath of flattery conquers strife. Plead on her part some cause to you unknown; Ant. S. Sweet mistress (what your name is else, And doubt not, sir, that she will well excuse
I know not,
Less, in your knowledge, and your grace, you show And let us to the Tiger all to dinner :
not, And, about evening, come yourself alone, Than our earth's wonder; more than earth divine. To know the reason of this strange restraint. Teach me, dear creature, how to think and speak; If by strong hand you offer to break in,
Lay open to my earthly gross conceit, Now in the stirring passage of the day, Smother'd in errors, feeble, shallow, weak, A vulgar comment will be made on it;
The folded meaning of your word's deceit. And that suppos’d by the common rout
Against my soul's pure truth why labour you, Against your yet ungalled estimation,
To make it wander in an unknown field? That may with foul intrusion enter in,
Are you a god ? would you create me new ?
But if that I am I, then well I know,
Far more, far more, to you do I decline.
, mermaid, with thy note, I know a wench of excellent discourse,
'To drown me in thy sister's flood of tears ;
Sing, siren, for thyself, and I will dote : (1) Have part. (2) A proverbial phrase. (3) i. e. Made fast. By this time. |(6) i.e. Being made altogether of credulity. (5) Love-springs are young plants or shoots of love.l7 Vain, is light of tongue. (8) Mermaid for siren.
Spread o'er the silver waves thy golden hairs, | Dro. S. No, sir, 'tis in grain ; Noah's flood could
Ant. S. What's her name?
Let love, being light, be drowned if she sink ! quarters, that is, an ell and three quarters, will
Dro. S. No longer from head to foot, than from
Ant. S. In what part of her body stands Ireland ? Luc. Gaze where you should, and that will clear Dro. S. Marry, sir, in her buttocks; I found it
out by the bogs. Anl. S. As good to wink, sweet love, as look on Ant, S. Where Scotland ? night.
Dro. S. I found it by the barrenness; hard, in Luc. Why call you me love? call my sister so. the palm of the hand. Ant. S. Thy sister's sister.
Ant, . Where France ? Luc.
That's my sister. Dro. S. In her forehead ; arm'd and reverted, Ant. S.
No; making war against her hair. It is thyself, mine own self's better part;
Ani, s. Where England ?
Luc. All this my sister is, or else should be. France and it.
Ant. S. Where America, the Indies ?
0, soft, sir, hold you still ; Dro. S. 0, sir, upon her nose, all o'er embellish'd I'll fetch my sister, to get her good will. with rubies, carbuncles, sapphires, declining their
(Erit Luciana. rich aspect to the hot breath of Spain ; who sent
whole armadıs of carracks to be ballast at her nose. Enler, from the house of Antipholus of Ephesus," Ant. S. Where stood Belgia, the Netherlands ? Dromio of Syracuse.
Dro. S. 0, sir, I did not look so low. To conAnl. S. Why, how now, Dromio? where runn'st clude, this drudge, or diviner, laid claim to me; thou so fast?
call'd me Dromio ; swore, I was assurd' to her; Dro. S. Do you know me, sir ? am I Dromio ? am told me what privy marks I had about me, as the I your man? am I myself?
mark of my shoulder, the mole in my neck, the Ant. S. Thou art Dromio, thou art my man, great wart on my left arm, that I, amazed, ran thou art thyself.
from her as a witch: and, I think, if my breast had Dro. S. I am an ass, I am a woman's man, and not been made of faith, and my heart of steel, she besides myself.
had transform'd me to a curtail-dog, and made me Ant. S. What woman's man? and how besides turn i'the wheel.” thyself?
Ant. S. Go, hie thee presently, post to the road; Dro. S. Marry, sir, besides myself, I am due to And if the wind blow any way from shore, a woman ; one that claims me, one that haunts me,
I will not harbour in this town to-night. one that will have me.
If any bark put forth, come to the mart, Ant. S. What claim lays she to thee?
Where I will walk, till thou return to me. Dro. $. Marry, sir, such claim as you would lay If every one know us, and we know none, to your horse ; and she would have me as a beast':'Tis time, I think, to irudge, pack, and be gone. not that, I being a beast, she would have me;, but
Dro. S. As from a bear a man would run for life, that she, being a very beastly creature, lays claim So dy I from her that would be my wife. (Exit.
Ant. S. There's none but witches do inhabit here; Ant. S. What is she?
And therefore, 'tis high time that I were hence. Dro. S. A very reverent body; ay, such a one She, that doth call me husband, even my soul as a man may not speak of, without he say, sir Doth for a wife abhor: but her fair sister, reverence: I have but lean luck in the match, and Possess'd with such a gentle sovereign grace, yet is she a wondrous fat marriage.
or such enchanting presence and discourse, Ant. S. How dost thou mean, a fat marriage ? Hath almost made me traitor to myself : Dro. S. Marry, sir, she's the kitchen-wench, and But, lest myself be guilty to self-wrong, all grease; and I know
not what use to put her to, I'll stop mine ears against the mermaid's song. but to make a lamp of her, and run from her by
Enter Angelo. her own light. I warrant, her rags, and the tallow in them, will burn a Poland winter: if she lives Ang. Master Antipholus ? *ill doomsday, she'll burn a week longer than the Ant. S. Ay, that's my name. whole world.
Ang. I know it well, sir : Lo, here is the chain ; Ant. S. What complexion is she of?
I thought to have ta’en you at the Porcupine: Dro. S. Swart,? like my shoe, but her face no- The chain unfinish'd made me stay thus long. thing like so clean kept; For why ? she sweats, a Ant. S. What is your will, that I shall do with man may go over shoes in the grime of it.
this? Ant. S. That's a fault that water will mend. Ang. What please yourself, sir; I have made
it for you. (1) i, e. Confounded. (2) Swarthy. 13) Large ships. (4) Allianced.
15) A turn-spit.
Ant. $. Made it for me, sir? I bespoke it not. Ang. Then you will bring the chain to her fourAng. Not once, nor twice, but twenty times you
self? have :
Anl. E. No; bear it with you, lest I come not Go home with it, and please your wife withal ;
time enough. And soon at supper-time I'll visit you,
Ang. Well, sir, I will: Have you the chain about And then receive my money for the chain. Ant. S. I pray you, sir, receive the money now;
Ant. E. An if I have not, sir, I hope you have ; For fear you ne'er see chain, nor money, more.
Or else you may relurn without your money. Ang. You are a merry man, sir ; fare you well. Ang. Nay, come, I pray you, sir, give me the
chain : Ant. S. What I should think of this, I cannot tell; Both wind and tide stays for this gentleman, But this I think, there's no man is so vain, And I, to blame, have held him here too long. That would refuse so fair an offer'd chain.
Ant. E. Good lord, you use this dalliance to I see, a man here needs not live by shifts, When in the streets he meets such golden giss.
Your breach of promise to the Porcupine: I'll to the mart, and there for Dromio stay; I should have chid you for not bringing it, If any ship put out, then straight away. (Exil. But, like a shrew, you first begin to brawl.
Mer. The hour steals on; I pray you, sir, des.
patch, Ang. You hear, how he importunes me; the
chain ACT IV.
Ant. E. Why, give it to my wife, and fetch your SCENE I.-The same. Enter a Merchant, An
money. gelo, and an Officer.
Ang. Comc, come, you know, I gave it you
even now ; Mer. You know, since Pentecost the sum is due, Either send the chain, or send me by some token. And since I have not much importun'd you; Anl. E. Fie! now you run this humour out of Nor now I had not, but that I'am bound
breath : To Persia, and want guilders' for my voyage : Come, where's the chain? I pray you let me see it. Therefore make present satisfaction,
Mer. My business cannot brook this dalliance ; Or I'll attach you by this officer.
Good sir, say, whe'r you'll answer me, or no; Ang. Even just the sum, that I do owe to you, if not, I'll leave him to the officer. Is growing? to me by Antipholus :
Ant. E. I answer you! What should I answer And, in the instant that I met with you, He had of me a chain ; at five o'clock,
Ang. The money, that you owe me for the chain. I shall receive the money for the same:
Ani. E. I owe you none, till I receive the chain. Pleaseth you walk with me down to his house, Ang. You know, I gave it you half an hour since. I will discharge my bond, and thank you too. Ani. E. You gave me none; you wrong me muce
to say so. Enter Antipholus of Ephesus, and Dromio of Ephesus.
Ang. You wrong me more, sir, in denying it:
Consider, how it stands upon my credit.
Off. I do, and charge you in the duke's name Ant. E. While I go to the goldsmith's house, go
to obey me. thou
Ang. This touches me in reputation :And buy a rope's end ; that will I hestow Either consent to pay this sum for me, Among my wife and her confederates,
Or I attach you by this officer. For locking me out of my doors by day.- Ant. E. Consent to pay thee that I never had' But soft, I see the goldsmith :-ret thee gone; Arrest me, foolish fellow, if thou dar'st. Buy thou a rope, and bring it home to me.
Ang. Here is thy fee; arrest him, officer; Dro. E. I buy a thousand pound a year! I buy I would not spare my brother in this case, a rope!
(Exil Dromio. If he should scorn me so apparently. Anl. E. A man is well holp up, that trusts to Off. I do arrest you, sir; you hear the suit. you:
Ant. E. I do obey thee, till I give thee bail :I promised your presence, and the chain; But, sirrah, you shall buy this sport as dear But neither chain, nor goldsmith, came to me:
As all the metal in your shop will answer. Belike, you thought our love would last too long, Ang. Sir, sir, I shall have law in Ephesus, If it were chain'd together; and therefore came not. 7o your notorious shame, I doubt it not. Ang. Saving your merry humour, here's the note,
Enter Dromio of Syracuse. How much your chain weighs to the utmost carat The fineness of the gold, and chargeful fashion ; Dro. S. Master, there is a bark of Epidamnum, Which doth amount to three odd ducats more That stays but till her owner comes aboard, Than I stand debted to this gentleman;
And then, sir, bears away: our fraughtare,* sir, I pray you, see him presently discharg'd,
I have convey'd aboard ; and I have bought
Blows fair from land: they stay for vought at all
peevish sheep, Disburse the sum on the receipt thereof; What ship of Epidamnum stays for me? Perchance, I will' be there as soon as you.
Dro. S. A ship you sent me to, to hire wastage.' (1) A coin. (2) Accruing. (3) I shall.
(4) Freight, cargo. (5) Silly. (6) Carriage.
Ani. E. Thou drunken slave, I sent thee for a One, whose hard heart is button'd up with steel; rope ;
A fiend, a l'airy, pitiless and rough; And told thee to what purpose ang what end. A woll, nay, worse, a fellow all in buff;' Dro. S. You sent me, sir, for a rope's end as A back-friend, a shoulder-clapper, one that coun
termands You sent me to the bay, sir, for a bark.
The passages of alleys, creeks, and narrow lands; Ani. E. I will debate this matter al more leisure, A hound that runs counter, and yet draws dry-foot And teach your ears to listen with more heed.
well; To Adriana, villain, hie thee straight:.
One that, before the judgment, carries poor souls Give her this key, and tell her, in the desk
to hell. That's cover'd o'cr with Turkish tapestry,
Adr. Why, man, what is the matter? There is a purse of ducats : let her send it, Dro. s. I do not know the matter : he is 'rested Tell her, I am arrested in the street,
on the case. And that shall bail me: hie thee, slave; be gone. Adr. What, is he arrested? tell me, at whose suit. On, officer, to prison till it come.
Dro. S. I know not at whose suit he is arrested, (Exeunt Mer. Ang. Off. and Ant. E. well; Dro. S. To Adriana! that is where he din'd, But he's in a suit of buff, which 'rested him, that Where Dowsabel did claim me for her husband :
can I tell: She is too big, I hope, for me to compass. Will you send him, mistress, redemption, the moThither I must, although against my will,
ney in the desk ? For servants must their masters' minds fulfil. (Er. Adr. Go felch it, sister.—This I wonder atą SCENE II.— The same. Enter Adriana and That he, unknown to me, should be in debt:
(Exit Luciana. Luciana.
Tell me, was he arrested on a band ?" Adr. Ah, Luciana, did he tempt thee sc?
Dro. $. Not on a band, but on a stronger thing: Might'st thou perceive austerely in his eye A chain, a chain; do you not hear it ring? That he did plead in earnest, yea or no?
Adr. What, the chain ? Look'd he or red, or pale; or sad, or merrily ? Dro. S. No, no, the bell : 'tis time, that I were What observation mad'st thou in this case,
gone. or his heart's meteors tilting in his face ?" It was two ere I left him, and now the clock strikes
Luc. First, he denied you had in him no right. Adr. He meant, he did me none; the more my Adr. The hours come back! that did I never hear. spite.
Dro. S. O yes, if any hour meet a sergeant, Luc. Then swore he, that he was a stranger here.
a'turns back for very fear. Adr. And true he swore, though yet forsworn Adr. As is time were in debt! how fondly dost he were.
thou reason ! Luc. Then pleaded I for you.
Drɔ. S. Time is a very bankrupt, and owes more Adr. And what said he?
than he's worth to scason. Luc. That love I begg'd for you, he begg'd of me. Nay, he's a thief too: Have you not heard men say, Adr. With what persuasion did he tempt thy That time comes stealing on by night and day? love ?
If he be in debt, and theft, and a sergeant in the way, Luc. With words, that in an honest suit might Hath he not reason to turn back an hour in a day? First he did praise my beauty; then, my speech.
Enter Luciana. Adr. Did'st speak him fair?
Adr. Go, Dromio; there's the money, bear it Luc. Have patience, I beseech.
straight; Adr. I cannot, nor I will not, hold me still; And bring thy master home immediately.My tongue, though not my heart, shall have his will. Come, sister; I am press'd down with conceit;' He is deformed, crooked, old, and sere, a
Conceit, my comfort, and my injury. (Exeuni. 'Il-fac'd, worse-bodied, shapeless every where; Vicious, ungentle, foolish, blunt, unkind;
SCENE III.-The sanie. Enter Antipholus of Stigmatical in making,' worse in mind.
Syracuse. Luc. Who would be jealous then of such a one ? Ant. S. There's not a man I meet, but doth No evil lost is wail'd when it is gone.
salute me Adr. Ah! but I think him better than I say, As if I were their well-acquainted friend;
And yet would herein others' eyes were worse : And every one doth call me by my name.
Some offer me commodities to buy :
Even now a tailor calld me in his shop,
And show'd me silks that he had bought for me, Dro. S. Here, go; the desk, the purse; sweet And, therewithal, took measure of my body. now, make haste.
Sure, these are but imaginary wiles, Luc. How hast thou lost thy breath?
And Lapland sorcerers inhabit here. Dro. S.
By running fast. Adr. Where is thy master, Dromio? is he well?
Enter Dromio of Syracuse. Dro. $. No, he's in tartar limbo, worse than hell: Dro. S. Master, here's the gold you sent me for : A devil in an everlasting garment hath him, What, have you got the picture of old Adam new
apparell’d? (1) An allusion to the redness of the northern lights likened to the appearance of armies. (5) The officers in those days were clad in buri, (2) Dry, withered.
which is also a cant expression for a man's skin. (3) Marked by nature with deformity.
(6) Hell was the cant term for prison. Who crieth most where her nest is not. (7) i, e. Bond.
(8) Fanciful conception,