THE KIND OF A MAN A WOMAN SHOULD MARRY. IF F you are looking for an angel you are on a fool's errand. There are none unpledged. Adam and Eve were the world's only perfect pair, and they did not keep house together very long before they both slid down the banks of Paradise together. 66 Better to enter the marriage state in the frame of mind of that company of American settlers who, in naming their town, called it Dictionary, because," as they said, "that's the only place where prosperity and happiness can always be found." Even a perfect matrimonial bargain would not please some people. Any woman of fair looks and ordinary sense can marry some sort of man. If you take a husband just for the sake of having one, you will find him a mortifying trophy, and an inconvenient property. A mother, having become alarmed at the failing state of her daughter's health, took her to a specialist for advice. After asking a few questions as to the girl's daily habits and mode of life, he carefully examined her heart and lungs and then gave an involuntary sigh. The mother grew pale, and waited anxiously for a verdict. "Madam," he said, "so far as I can discover your daughter is suffering from a most serious complaint, which, for want of a better name, I call 'dullness.' I have no medicine which is specific for this disease.” Girls who suffer in this way too often prescribe for themselves marriage with men whom they cannot love and honor. But what else can the poor things do? Many are not trained to useful work, and they must live. Marrying for a home is a most tiresome way of getting a living. A marriage without love is a mockery that blushes to the skies. But money is the thing sought for, matrimony is looked upon as a matter of money, and Cupid, having man? Can ancestry or wealth cover up mental imbecility and moral baseness? Gold cannot buy happiness. Position cannot bring it. What is the interest on $100,000 or $1,000,000 in comparison to dividends drawn from a loyal heart and an educated brain? Moreover, there is no certainty in the possession of money. The rich of to-day are often tomorrow's poor. The great wealth of this country is in the hands of those who were once poor. Eighty-five per cent of the great leaders come from the farm and the rural districts. The commercial leaders of the next generation are the poor boys of to-day. Don't marry a man to mend him or reform him. If the man were not deformed he would not need to be reformed. The man with malformed habits is more likely to bring you sorrow and shame than joy and happiness. The risks are great enough for any woman even when she marries a man who does not need reforming. Marry a gentleman. I use that word in its broadest sense. It has not reference to fine rai ment and white hands, and the veneering of society polish merely, but to those who have noble qualities, however hard their hands and sunbrowned their faces. Social standing is no criterion of gentility. You frequently find more real gentlemen in the humbler than in the higher walks of life. An Oriental couplet runs: A jewel is a jewel still, though lying in the dust, As you value your life do not marry a manikin, a hatter's showblock, or a tailor's lay figure. The dandy dressed up is like the cinnamon tree, the bark is worth more than the body. Discriminate between show and substance. The young man who has character does not need superficial display. His manhood is his challenge. When women go to purchase a dress, how careful they are! They will go where they are sure the best is kept in stock, how they test the strength of the fabric, ask questions about it, and submit it to the scrutiny of the most com |