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Fal. Well, sirs, I am almost out at heels.
Fal. There is no remedy; I must coney-catch; I must shift.
Pist. Young ravens must have food.
Fal. My honest lads, I will tell you what I am about.
Pist. Two yards, and more,
Fal. No quips now, Pistol ; Indeed I am in the waist two yards about: but I am now about no waste; I am about thrift. Briefly, I do mean to make love to Ford's wife ; I spy entertainment in her ; she discourses, she carves, she gives the leer of invitation : I can construe the action of her familiar style; and the hardest voice of her behaviour, to be English'd rightly, is, I am Sir John Falstaff's.
Pist. He hath study'd her well, and translated her well; out of honesty into English.
Nym. The anchor is deep: will that humour pass ?
Fal. Now, the report goes, she has all the rule of her husband's purse; she hath legions of angels.
Pist. As many devils entertain ; and, To her, boy,
Nym. The humour rises; it is good: humour me the angels.
Fal. I have writ me here a letter to her: and here another to Page's wife; who even now gave me good
eyes too, examin'd' my parts with most judicious eyliads 27 : sometimes the beam of her view gilded my foot, sometimes my portly belly.
Pist. Then did the sun on dung-hill shine.
Fal. O, she did so course o'er my exteriors with such a greedy intention, that the appetite of her eye did seem to scorch me up like a burning-glass! Here's another letter to her: she bears the purse too; she is a region in Guiana 25, all gold and bounty. I will be cheater 29 to them both, and they shall be exchequers to me; they shall be my East and West Indies, and I will trade to them both. Go, bear thou this letter to mistress Page ; and thou this to mistress Ford : we will thrive, lads, we will thrive.
Pist. Shall I sir Pandarus of Troy become, And by my side wear steel? then, Lucifer take all !
Nym. I will run no base humour : here, take the humour letter ; I will keep the 'haviour of reputation. Fal. Hold, sirrah, [To Rob.] bear you these let
ters tightly; Sail like my pinnace to these golden shores.Rogues, hence, avaunt ! vanish like hail-stones, go; Trudge, plod, away, o'the hoof; seek shelter, pack! Falstaff will learn the humour of this age, French thrift, you rogues ; myself, and skirted page.
[Exeunt Falstaff and Robin. Pist. Let vultures gripe thy guts! for gourd, and
fullam so holds, And high and low beguile the rich and poor :
Tester l'll have in pouch, when thou shalt lack,
Nym. I have operations in my head, which be humours of revenge.
Pist. Wilt thou revenge?
By welkin, and her star!
With both the humours, I:
How Falstaff, varlet vile,
And his soft couch defile. Nym. My humour shall not cool : I will incense Page to deal with poison ; I will possess him with yellowness, for the revolt of mien *1 is dangerous : that is my true humour.
Pist. Thou art the Mars of malcontents : I second thee; troop on.
A Room in Dr. Caius's House.
Enter Mrs. QUICKLY, SIMPLE, and RUGBY.
Quick. What; John Rugby!- I pray thee, go to the casement, and see if you can see my master, master Dr. Caius, coming : if he do, i'faith, and find any body in the house, here will be an old abusing of God's patience, and the king's English.
Rug. I'll go watch.
[Erit Rugby. Quick. Go; and we'll have a posset for't soon at night, in faith, at the latter end of a sea-coal fire. An honest, willing, kind fellow, as ever servant shall come in hoặse withal; and, I warrant you, no tell-tale, nor no breed-bate 32 : his worst fault is, that he is given to prayer ; he is something peevish that way : but nobody but has his fault;-but let that pass. Peter Simple, you say your name is ?
Sim. Ay, for fault of a better.
Quick. Does he not wear a great round beard, like a glover's paring-knife ?
Sim. No, forsooth: he hath but a little wee face, with a little yellow beard; a Cain-colour'd S beard.
Quick. A softly-sprighted man, is he not?
Sim. Ay, forsooth: but he is as tall a man of his hands, as any is between this and his head; he hath fought with a warrener.
Quick. How say you ?-O, I should remember him; Does he not hold up his head, as it were ? and strut in his gait ?
Sim. Yes, indeed, does he.
Quick. Well, heaven send Anne Page no worse fortune! Tell master parson Evans, I will do what I can for your master : Anne is a good girl, and I wish
Rug. Out, alas ! here comes my master.
young man; go into this closet. (Shuts Simple in the closet.] He will not stay long.-What, John Rugby! John, what, John, I say !-Go, John, go enquire for my master; I doubt, he be not well, that he comes not home :--and down, down, adown-a, &c. [sings.
Enter Doctor Caius.
Caius. Vat is you sing? I do not like dese toys; Pray you, go and vetch me in my closet un boitier verd; a box, a green-a box; Do intend vat I speak ? a green-a box.
Quick. Ay, forsooth, I'll fetch it you. I am glad he went not in himself: if he had found the young man, he would have been horn-mad. [Aside.
Caius, Fe, fe fe, fe! ma foi, il fait fort chaud. Je m'en vais à la Cour,-la grande affaire.
Quick. Is it this, sir?
Caius. Ouy; mette le au mon pocket; Depeche, quickly :-Vere is dat knave Rugby?
Quick. What, John Rugby! John!
Caius. You are John Rugby, and you are Jack Rugby: Come, take-a your rapier, and come after my heel to de court.
Rug. 'Tis ready, sir, here in the porch.
Caius. By my trot, I tarry too long :--Od's me! Qu'ay j'oublié ? dere is some simples in my closet, dat I vill not for the varld I shall leave behind.
Quick. Ah me! he'll find the young man there, and be mad.
Caius. O diable, diable! vat is in my closet ?-Vil