DRAPS O' WHISKY.

A SCOTCH SANG.
BY THE SAME.

(Original.]
W

HENE’ER I’m fash'd* wi' ony plague,

My thirapple † dry an' husky,
I never grane I, but weet g my craig Il

Wi’ draps o' Highland whisky.
Young lads and laffes dress ye fine,

An' tight an’ braw iy q brisk ye;
There's nae fic pride an' pleafure mine,

As drinking draps o' whisky.
Soon as the sun sets i' the wast,

An' it grows mirk ** an' dusky,
Wi’ droughty chealsti I sit me fast,

To tipple draps o' whisky.
When ance sat down we seldom rise,

Till we get fu’ II an' frisky,
An' ilka gg loon, till tongue-tack'd |III cries

For t'ither drap o' whilky.

EPITAPH ON A NOTED HIGHWAYMAN, EXHIBITED AŞ AN EXAMPLE

TO HIS BRETHREN.

A PARODY.

BY THE SAME.

[Original.] HER

ERE high fufpended on a gibbet hangs

A youth to ev'ry crime and plunder prone ;
Till caught at length, by law's resistless fangs,

The gaping gallows seiz'd him as its own.

* Troubled.
t Windpipe.

Groan.
Wet.
Throat,
Gaily

** Dark.
tt Fellows.
II Intoxicated.
$$ Every.

Speechless.

Bad

Bad were his sentiments, his actions worse;

And when he mounted Newgate's fatal drop,
He gave the hangman a tremendous curse,

And got from him, what he deserv'd-a rope.

A MARGATE ADVERTISEMENT OF AN ASS-HIRER, WHOSE DONKEYS ARE ALTERNATELY

EMPLOYED BY LADIES AND SMUGGLERS.

BY THE SAME.

[Original.]
ASSES here to be let for all purposes right,

To bear angels by day, and spirits by night.

EPIGRAM
ON A CERTAIN MELODRAME.
WHILE Knights and

Fairies toil to make
One beauty on the stage awake,
Sly Morpheus, to the boxes creeping,
A thoufand beauties fets a feeping!

Yorieķ.

COOKE's UNPARALLELED EXCELLENCE!
IN
N characters new, and in characters old,

Cooke muust be allow'd a matchless fine fellow :
For act what he will, we are constantly told,
That in every part he is perfectly mellow!

ROBIN GOODFELLOW,

IMPROMPTU ON THE YOUNG ROSCIUS.

[From the Birmingham Chronicle.)
T Betty astonislı'd, the people all gaz'd;

“ 'T was wonderful!" still they kepl·taying.
For my part, I own, I was not much amaz’d
At seeing a little boy playing.

ANOTH&R

'ANOTHER. KEMBLE's laurels Young Betty's determin

d. to crop, And Cooke's well-carn'd fame to demolish; But before he exhibits in Old Drury's shop,

He's to Birmingham come for a polith!

EPIGRAM.

Nunc eft bibendum, Hor. THE hill of fame is difficult to climb,

Few have the strength to reach her heights sublime Arriv'd half way, Cooke, like a lazy elf, Sits down contented, and gets drunk himself; While Betty, emulous to gain renown, Goes boldly on, by making drunk--the town!

Big

VERSES BY THE PORTUGUESE DWARF.

From the Oracle]
GENTLE dames of high degree,

Now you've lost dear Master Betty:
And there's nothing left to see

Quite so delicate and pretty ;
Gracious dames of high degree,
Deign to look on little me!
He for acting is the lad,

(So says Signor Smith of Bury ;)
He has made the fine folks mad,

I should make the mad folks nierry,
Could they fee my viney person,
Side by side with John Macpherson !
I'm the least of little things,

Years will only make me smaller ;
He's a twig that (prouts and springs,

Every month will make him taller :
Then farewell your little darling,
When cock-fparrow proves a starling!

What

What though mightiest actors tremble

At this terrible Tom Thumb,
Aftlima feizing bold John Kemble,

Siddons jaw.lockt, glouting, glum :
Certain sure, as here I am,
All this fuss is mere flim-Alam !
When with Cooke's Glenalvon meeting,

Little Douglas treads the ftage,
You would swear they were repeating

Sir John Falstaff and his Page;
Conscious of superior merit,
Cooke ne'er stoops his lofty spirit.
Lichfield, queen of tragic tears,

Duncan, gay Thalia's child,
Jordan in our raptur'd ears

“ Warbling native wood-notes wild :"
These shall charm, when throngh the nation
Folly ceases to be fashion.
What do wifer people say

About all this puff and pother?
That the mouse will make its way,

When the mountain is a mocher:
This the wiser people say-
If you will be fools, you may.
THE PORTUGUESE Dwarv.

.

PUBLIC TASTE.

[Original.) ROM feasting on Siddons how often I find

Fools feast upon Harlequin more to their mind : Thus flies, I?ve observ'd, from a taste as absund, ..On koney first feed, then indulge on a

W. H.

FRO

THE ADVANTAGES OF SOLITUDE FOR STUDY.

(Original.]
MY garden neat

Has got a seat
That's hid from ev'ry eye, Sir ;
There day and night
I read and write,
And nobody's the wiser.

W. H.

A SHORT STORY.

[Original.] I

HEARD a Judge his Tipstaff call,

And say, “Sir, I desire,
You go forthwith, and search the Hall,
And send me in my

Crier."
“ And search, my Lord, in vain I may,'

The Tipftaff gravely said:
• The Crier cannot cry to-day,

Because his wife is dead."

W. H.

WRITTEN IN THE WINDOW OF A VILLAGE

SCHOOLMASTER.

[Original.] Principia Legendi, Scribendi, et Saltandi, in hac Schola inculcata. THEY who to greatness would advance,

Must read and write, and also dance.

Defcendens a Vertice ad Imum.
If the head resist my pains,
Through the breech I reach the brains;
Proper pressure on the middle
Fits heads for books, and heels for fiddle.

W. H.

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