W

DRAPS O' WHISKY.

A SCOTCH SANG.

BY THE SAME.

[Original.]

HENE'ER I'm fafh'd* wi' ony plague,
My thrapple + dry an' husky,

I never granet, but weet § my craig ||
Wi' draps o' Highland whifky.
Young lads and laffes drefs ye fine,
An' tight an' brawly ¶ brisk ye;
There's nae fic pride an' pleafure mine,
As drinking draps o' whifky.

Soon as the fun fets i' the waft,
An' it grows mirk ** an' dusky,
Wi' droughty cheals++ I fit me fast,
To tipple draps o' whisky.

When ance fat down we feldom rise,
Till we get fu' ‡‡ an' frisky,

An' ilka § loon, till tongue-tack'd cries
For t' ither drap o' whisky.

EPITAPH

ON A NOTED HIGHWAYMAN, EXHIBITED AS AN EXAMPLE

TO HIS BRETHREN.

A PARODY.

BY THE SAME.

[Original.]

HERE high fufpended on a gibbet hangs

A youth to ev'ry crime and plunder prone;
Till caught at length, by law's refiftlefs fangs,
The gaping gallows feiz'd him as its own.

* Troubled.
+ Windpipe.
Groan.
Wet.
Throat,
¶ Gaily.

** Dark.
tt Fellows.

Intoxicated.

$$Every.
Speechlefs.

Bad

Bad were his fentiments, his actions worse;
And when he mounted Newgate's fatal drop,
He gave the hangman a tremendous curse,
And got from him, what he deserv’d—a rope.

A MARGATE ADVERTISEMENT OF AN ASS-HIRER, WHOSE DONKEYS ARE ALTERNATELY EMPLOYED BY LADIES AND SMUGGLERS.

BY THE SAME.

[Original.]

ASSES here to be let! for all purposes right,
To bear angels by day, and Spirits by night.

EPIGRAM

ON A CERTAIN MELO-DRAME.

WHILE Knights and Fairies toil to make

One beauty on the ftage awake,

Sly Morpheus, to the boxes creeping,
A thousand beauties fets a fleeping!

YORICK.

COOKE's UNPARALLELED EXCELLENCE!

N characters new, and in characters old,

IN

Cooke must be allow'd a matchlefs fine fellow;
For act what he will, we are conftantly told,

That in every part he is perfectly mellow !

ROBIN GOODFELLOW,

IMPROMPTU ON THE YOUNG ROSCIUS. [From the Birmingham Chronicle.}

T Betty aftonif'd, the people all gaz'd ;
"'T was wonderful!" ftill they kept-faying.
For my part, I own, I was not much amaz'd
At feeing a little boy playing.

ANOTHER.

ANOTHER.

KEMBLE's laurels Young Betty's determin'd to crop,

And Cooke's well-earn'd fame to demolish;

But before he exhibits in Old Drury's shop,
He's to Birmingham come for a polish!

EPIGRAM.

Nunc eft bibendum. HoR.

HE bill of fame is difficult to climb,

THE

Few have the strength to reach her heights fublime; Arriv'd half way, Cooke, like a lazy elf,

Sits down contented, and gets drunk himself;
While Betty, emulous to gain renown,
Goes boldly on, by making drunk—the town!

VERSES BY THE PORTUGUESE DWARF.

[From the Oracle]

GENTLE dames of high degree,

Now you've loft dear Mafter Betty;

And there's nothing left to fee

Quite fo delicate and pretty;
Gracious dames of high degree,
Deign to look on little me!

He for acting is the lad,

(So fays Signor Smith of Bury ;)
He has made the fine folks mad,

I should make the mad folks merry,
Could they fee my tiney perfon,
Side by fide with John Macpherfon!

I'm the least of little things,

Years will only make me smaller;
He's a twig that sprouts and springs,
Every month will make him taller :
Then farewell your little darling,
When cock-Sparrow proves a ftarling!

What

What though mightiest actors tremble
At this terrible Tom Thumb,
Aftlima feizing bold John Kemble,
Siddons jaw-lockt, glouting, glum :
Certain fure, as here I am,

All this fufs is mere flim-flam!

When with Cooke's Glenalvon meeting,
Little Douglas treads the stage,
You would fwear they were repeating
Sir John Falfaff and his Page;
Conscious of fuperior merit,
Cooke ne'er stoops his lofty fpirit.

Lichfield, queen of tragic tears,
Duncan, gay Thalia's child,
Jordan in our raptur'd ears

"Warbling native wood-notes wild :"
Thefe fhall charm, when through the nation
Folly ceases to be fashion.

What do wifer people fay

About all this puff and pother?
That the moufe will make its way,
When the mountain is a mother:

This the wifer people say→→
If you will be fools, you may.

THE PORTUGuese Dwary.

PUBLIC TASTE.

[Original.]

FROM feafting on Siddons how often I find
Fools feaft upon Harlequin more to their mind:
Thus flies, I've obferv'd, from a taste as absurd,
:. On koney first feed, then indulge on a —

W. H.

THE

THE ADVANTAGES OF SOLITUDE FOR STUDY.

I

HEARD a Judge his Tipftaff call,

And fay, "Sir, I defire,

You go forthwith, and fearch the Hall,

And fend me in my Crier."

"And fearch, my Lord, in vain I may,"

The Tipftaff gravely faid:

"The Crier cannot cry to-day,

Because his wife is dead."

W. H.

W. H.

WRITTEN IN THE WINDOW OF A VILLAGE

SCHOOLMASTER.
[Original.]

Principia Legendi, Seribendi, et Saltandi, in hac Schola inculcata.

THEY who to greatness would advance,
Muft read and write, and also dance.
Defcendens a Vertice ad Imum.

If the head refift my pains,

Through the breech I reach the brains;

Proper preffure on the middle

Fits heads for books, and heels for fiddle.

W. H.

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