LORD MELVILLE AND DEACON RANKEN. [From the Morning Chronicle.] The following Extract of a Letter from Edinburgh has been juft handed to us; and though evidently a private communication, we give it a place, as it may probably be intelligible to fome of our Readers from that quarter, though not to us. THE joy which his Lordship's acquittal has diffused among his friends here, is not to be told. Sir William Fettes, of Whamphry, Baronet, our Lord Provoft, was in his fhop when the letter came; but he had no fooner read it, than out he fkipped into the street, fnapping his fingers, and roaring with the ut moft energy. Luckily, Deacon Ranken, His Majesty's tailor for Scotland, happened at the very moment to be going to his mercer for buckram, and being efpied by the Provoft, was made acquainted with the news, and conducted, after an embrace of ecstacy and a hundred kiffes, to fhare the rapture and the councils of the magiftrate in his own fhop. The Deacon in reality was the very person that the Provoft wished to fee, for he holds nobody higher in his efteem than Deacon Ranken, as being not only the royal tailor, but deeply fkilled in the politics of the town, and greatly loved by Lord Melville himself and the whole party. But the late metaphyfical question concerning caufe and effect, which fo much agitated the kirk, has crowned the King's tailor with untading laurels, and raised him, in the opinion of all good judges, to an exact level, as a philofopher, with Dr. Grieve and Principal Baird. Nothing could be more lucky, therefore, as I have faid, than his meeting with the Provost on fuch an occafion. The first measure, of course, was to fet the bells aringing for the day. But who can defcribe the mutual congratulations 1 congratulations that paffed among us in all parts of the town as foon as it was known that our great patron had escaped fcot-free!-For, to tell you the truth, we were not a little alarmed during the trial, although my friend Deacon Ranken would often endeavour to allay our apprehenfions, and put the thing before me very ingenioufly, and with the happieft illuftration. "Suppofe me," he would fay," fitting on this fhop-board, to be Treasurer of the Navy, and my fore inan there (who is this very moment cutting out a fuit for my friend the new Procurator for the church) to be my Trotter or Paymafter. Very well: you fee how he flashes with thofe large fhears, and what flices he is casting into that great tub under his table. That is all cabbage, and of right appertains to him in confideration of his wages being finall. The fellow fells it on Mondays; and, even admitting that he flides a few guineas into my waistcoat on a Tuesday morning, is it therefore to be concluded that I have been conniving at the cabbage?But I will go farther," the Deacon would fay, pufhing the goofe on one fide to make room for his attitudes, "I will go farther, and demand where is the harm, and who is the lofer either, by Trotter's cabbage or my foreman's-Connell, the new Procurator, you fee, notwithstanding all the parings, gets an entire coat, and what more would he have Trotter, in like manner, fweats a million or two of public money for his own benefit; but the faid millions are not a bit the worfe for that. They are paid back again; and the nation (I maintain it) is no more entitled to fhare in his cabbage, than my friend Connell is to have the fhreds of his coat fent home in the pockets: a thing monftrous and unheard of among tailors." Now, my dear friend, I have been led fo far aftray from my narrative of our rejoicings, that I know not where to begin it again. Our Jufticiary Colonel or dered the guns in the castle to be fired, but met with no better fuccefs than when he commanded the trembling cathier to pay his notes in fpecie. The caftle, it feems,, was out of his reach as much as William Simpfon's half-crowns; but there is no doubt that he can make the corps fire a feu-de-joye on this inspiriting occafion, and that will do nearly as well. The Lord Provoft, it is expected, will order a general illumination, and I have got plenty of boys provided to break John Clerk's windows. The plans for giving more enlarged fcope to our joy are numerous. Some fay the Magiftrates are to make a procellion; and it is thought the Reverend Principal will attend with the old white horfe, which acted fo confpicuous a part with him at the execution of Watt. And this learned perfonage (I mean the Principal, this renowned rival of Dr. Robertfon's fame, for whofe appointment the University, and the caufe of learning, are exclufively indebted to the Noble Vifconnt, will then have an opportu nity of holding up the splendid character of his patron to the imitation of the young men of the college, whom he fo claffically addreffes by the name of Juventutes. The Statue, you may be fure, is not forgotten. In the great diverfity of opinions regarding the fituation, incline moft to thofe who propofe its erection in gigantic fize, on the Calton Hill, where it may ferve as a beacon for the Navy on one fide, and for the Treasurers and Paymasters on the other. Parliament Clofe, June 15. AN HA AN EXCELLENT NEW SONG. [From the Morning Chronicle] MR. EDITOR, AVING been much gratified by the perufal of fome choice and luminous ftanzas for the feftive meeting at Edinburgh, from the pen of the Editor of Border Ballads, I am concerned that I cannot indulge your readers with a copy-the more fo, as it might well be expected that a mufe which ever delights to fing of pilfering depredation and midnight booty, would fucceed much better in a fpirited fong on this happy occafion. It could not be imagined that only this bard fhould be infpired by fuch theme-the author of the following verfes having fallen from his chair before it came to his turn to give a fong, does not with that his labours fhould be in vain, or his adulation loft. July 8. SONG" Hooly and Fairly." WE're met here to fwid, boys, and gobble down victuals, Of one too whofe fervice we well may prize dearly; Scotland, fall proftrate, and worship auld Harry, A Statefman more bounteous ne'er fione on a nation! Seffion Clerks, Sheriffs, Excifemen,, and Lordies, Hopes and Dundaffes, you 're here, troth, by dozens; He fhould hae a long fpoon who fups wie the de'el, man, YESTERDAY at three p.m. departed this life Mr. Seffion, fourth fon of Mrs. Parliament, of the united kingdom of Great Britain and Ireland. On Monday he became motionless and fpeechlefs; and at the above hour yefterday, the Lord Chancellor, in the most folemn and impreflive manner, declared the vital Spark entirely extinguifhed. Mr. Seffion, in his infancy, fuftained a heavy lofs in the death of a favourite Steward, who had been in the fervice of the family above twenty years, and had the entire management of all their affairs. He was the fecond fon of the great Earl of Chatham, and being a very clever fellow, tranfacted all the bufinefs with his own hands. The confequence was, on the moment of his decease, the whole economy of the houfe fell into diforder and confufion; all the under-fervants having been felected and hired merely as his creatures and dependants, and not for their industry and talents. They all knew the way to the pantry and the kitchen, but not one of them could bake the bread, brew the beer, keep the accounts, or plough and fow the land. Aware that they must be turned off, and expecting every moment their discharge, to the pantry and the kitchen they ran, to fill their pouches, and make the most of their short time. One made an attempt to carry off a pie, another a peck |