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For my part, I have one general key to me and exercise at the several weapons the behaviour of the fair sex. When I see following, viz: them singular in any part of their dress, I
• Back sword, Single falchion, conclude it is not without some evil inten
'Sword and dagger, Case of falchions, tion: and therefore question not but the
'Sword and buckler, Quarter staff.” design of this strange fashion is to smite more effectually their male beholders. If the generous ardour in James Miller to Now to set them right in this particular, I dispute the reputation of Timothy Buck would fain have them consider with them- | had something resembling the old heroes selves, whether we are not more likely to of romance, Timothy Buck returned anbe struck by a figure entirely female, than swer in the same paper with the like spirit, with such a one as we may see every day adding a little indignation at being chalin our glasses. Or, if they please, let them lenged, and seeming to condescend to fight reflect upon their own hearts, and think James Miller, not in regard to Miller himhow they would be affected should they self, but in that as the fame went about, he meet a man on horseback, in his breeches had fought Parkes of Coventry. The acand jack-boots, and at the same time dress-ceptance of the combat ran in these words: ed up in a commode and a nightraile. I must observe that this fashion was first
I Timothy Buck, of Clare-market, masof all brought to us from France, a country ter of the noble science of defence, hearing which has infected all the nations of Europe heg
he did fight Mr. Parkes* of Coventry, wili with its levity. I speak not this in deroga
not fail (God willing) to meet this fair intion of a whole people, having more than
than viter at the time and place appointed, de
er once found fault with those general reflec- siring a clear stage and no favour. tions which strike at kingdoms or common
• Vivat Regina.' wealths in the gross a piece of cruelty, I shall not here look back on the spectawhich an ingenious writer of our own com-cles of the Greeks and Romans of this kind, pares to that of Caligula, who wished that but must believe this custom took its rise the Roman people had all but one neck, from the ages of knight-errantry; from that he might behead them at a blow. I those who loved one woman so well, that shall therefore only remark, that as liveli- they hated all men and women else; from ness and assurance are in a peculiar man- those who would fight you, whether you ner the qualifications of the French nation, were or not of their mind; from those who the same habits and customs will not give demanded the combat of their contemporathe same offence to that people which they ries, both for admiring their mistress or produce amongst those of our own country. discommending her. I cannot therefore but Modesty is our distinguishing character, as lament, that the terrible part of the ancient. vivacity is theirs: and when this our na- sight is preserved, when the amorous side tional virtue appears in that female beauty of it is forgotten. We have retained the for which our British ladies are celebrated barbarity, but lost the gallantry of the old above all others in the universe, it makes combatants. I could wish, methinks, these up the most amiable object that the eye of gentlemen had consulted me in the proman can possibly behold,
C. nulgation of the conflict. I was obliged by
a fair young maid, whom I understood to
be called Elizabeth Preston, daughter of No. 436.] Monday, July 21, 1712. the keeper of the garden, with a glass of Verso pollice vulgi
water; who I imagined might have been, Quemlibet occidunt populariter. Juv. Sat. iii. 30. for form's sake, the general representative With thumbs bent back, they popularly kill.
of the lady fought for, and from her beauty
Dryden. the proper Amaryllis on these occasions. Being a person of insatiable curiosity, I
It would have run better in the challenge, could not forbear going on Wednesday last l..
I James Miller, sergeant, who have trato a place of no small renown for the gal- ||
velled parts abroad, and came last from the lantry of the lower order of Britons, to
frontier of Portugal, for the love of Elizathe Bear-garden, at Hockley in the Hole; |
beth Preston, do assert that the said Elizawhere (as a whitish brown paper, put into
beth is the fairest of women.' Then the my hand in the street, informed me) there was to be a trial of skill exhibited between * On a large tomb, in the great church-yard of Coven. two masters of the noble science of de-try, is the following inscription :
To the memory of Mr. John Sparkes, a native of this fence, at two of the clock precisely. I was
city: he was a man of a mild disposition, a gladiator by not a little charmed with the solemnity of profession : who, after having fought 350 battles in the the challenge which ran thus:
principal parts of Europe with honour and applause, at
length quitted the stage, sheathed his sword, and, with I James Miller, sergeant, (lately come
Christian resignation, submitted to the grand victor in
the 52d year of his age. Anno salutis humano 1733." from the frontier of Portugal) master of the noble science of defence, hearing in His friend, sergeant Miller, here mentioned, a man
of vast athletic accomplishments, was advanced afterfame of Timothy Buck, of London, master
wards to the rank of a captain in the British army, and
did notable service in Scotland under the duke of Cum. of the said science, do invite him to meet herland, in 1745
answer; 'I Timothy Buck, who have staid | if all their lives depended on the first blow, in Great Britain during all the war in The combatants met in the middle of the foreign parts, for the sake of Susannah stage, and shaking hands, as removing all Page, do deny that Elizabeth Preston is so malice, they retired with much grace to fair as the said Susannah Page. Let Susan- the extremities of it; from whence they nah Page look on, and I desire of James immediately faced about, and approached Miller no favour.'
each other, Miller with a heart full of resoThis would give the battle quite another lution, Buck with a watchful untroubled turn; and a proper station for the ladies, countenance; Buck regarding principally whose complexion was disputed by the his own defence, Miller chiefly thoughtful sword, would animate the disputants with of annoying his opponent. It is not easy to a more gallant incentive than the expecta- describe the many escapes and imperceptition of money from the spectators; though ble defences between two men of quick I would not have that neglected, but thrown eyes and ready limbs; but Miller's heat to that fair one whose lover was approved laid him open to the rebuke of the calm by the donor.
Buck, by a large cut on the forehead. Much Yet, considering the thing wants such effusion of blood covered his eyes in a moamendments, it was carried with great or- ment, and the huzzas of the crowd under. James Miller came on first, preceded doubtedly quickened the anguish. The by two disabled drummers, to show, I sup- Assembly was divided into parties upon pose, that the prospect of maimed bodies their different ways of fighting; while a did not in the least deter him. There poor nymph in one of the galleries appaascended with the daring Miller a gentle- rently suffered for Miller, and burst into a man, whose name I could not learn, with a flood of tears. As soon as his wound was dogged air, as unsatisfied that he was not wrapped up, he came on again with a little principal. This son of anger lowered at the rage, which still disabled him farther. But whole assembly, and, weighing himself as what brave man can be wounded into more he marched round from side to side, with a patience and caution? The next was a stiff knee and shoulder, he gave intimations warm eager onset, which ended in a deof the purpose he smothered till he saw the cisive stroke on the left leg of Miller. The issue of the encounter. Miller had a blue lady in the gallery, during this second strife, ribbon tied round the sword arm; which covered her face, and for my part I could ornament I conceive to be the remains of not keep my thoughts from being mostly that custom of wearing a mistress's favour employed on the consideration of her unon such occasions of old.
happy circumstance that moment, hearing Miller is a man of six foot eight inches the clashing of swords, and apprehending height, of a kind but bold aspect, well life or victory concerning her lover in every fashioned, and ready of his limbs; and such blow, but not daring to satisfy herself on readiness as spoke his ease in them was ob- whom they fell. The wound was exposed tained from a habit of motion in military to the view of all who could delight in it, exercise,
and sewed up on the stage. The surly seThe expectation of the spectators was cond of Miller declared at this time, that now almost at its height; and the crowd he would that day fortnight fight Mr. Buck pressing in, several active persons thought at the same weapons, declaring himself the they were placed rather according to their master of the renowned Gorman; but Buck fortune than their merit, and took it in their denied him the honour of that courageous heads to prefer themselves from the open disciple, and asserting that he himself had area or pit to the galleries. The dispute taught that champion, accepted the chalbetween desert and property brought many lenge. to the ground, and raised others in propor- There is something in nature very unaction to the highest seats by turns, for the countable on such occasions, when we see space of ten minutes, till Timothy Buck the people take a certain painful gratificacame on, and the whole assembly, giving tion in beholding these encounters. Is it up their disputes, turned their eyes upon cruelty that administers this sort of delight? the champions. Then it was that every or is it a pleasure which is taken in the exman's affection turned to one or the other ercise of pity? It was, methought, pretty irresistibly. A judicious gentleman near remarkable that the business of the day me said, "I could, methinks, be Miller's being a trial of skill, the popularity did not second, but I had rather have Buck for run so high as one would have expected on mine.' Miller had an audacious look, that the side of Buck. Is it that people's passions took the eye; Buck, a perfect composure, have their rise in self-love, and thought that engaged the judgment. Buck came on themselves in spite of all the courage they in a plain coat, and kept all his air till the had) liable to the fate of Miller, but could instant of engaging; at which time he un- not so easily think themselves qualified like dressed to his shirt, his arm adorned with Buck? a bandage of red riband. No one can de- Tully speaks of this custom with less scribe the sudden concern in the whole horror than one would expect, though he assembly; the most tumultuous crowd in confesses it was much abused in his time, nature was as still and as much engaged as I and seems directly to approve of it under
its first regulations, when criminals only instigation of Flavilla's mother, brought fought before the people. Crudele gladia-about the match for the daughter; and the torum spectaculum et inhumanum nonnullis reputation of this, which is apparently, in videri solet, et haud scio annon ita sit ut point of fortune, more than Flavilla could nunc fil; cum vero sontes ferro depugna- expect, has gained her the visits and frebant, auribus fortasse multa, oculis quidem quent attendance of the crowd of mothers, nulla, poterat esse fortior contra dolorem et who had rather see their children misermortem disciplina. The shows of gladia-able in great wealth, than the happiest of tors may be thought barbarous and inhu-the race of mankind in a less conspicuous man, and I know not but it is so as now state of life. When Sempronia is so well practised; but in those times when only acquainted with a 'woman's temper and criminals were combatants, the ear per circumstances, that she believes marriage haps might receive many better instruc- would be acceptable to her, and advantions, but it is impossible that any thing tageous to the man who shall get her, her which affects our eyes should fortify us so next step is to look out for some one, whose well against pain and death.'
T. condition has some secret wound in it, and
wants a sum, yet, in the eye of the world, not unsuitable to her. If such is not easily
had, she immediately adorns a worthless No. 437.] Tuesday, July 22, 1712.
fellow with what estate she thinks conveTune impune hæc facias? Tune hic homines adolescen.
nient, and adds as great a share of good tulos,
humour and sobriety as is requisite. After Imperitos rerum, eductos libere, in fraudem illicis ? this is settled, no importunities, arts, and Sollicitando et pollicitando eorum animos lactas?
devices, are omitted, to hasten the lady to Ac meretricios amores nuptiis conglutinas?
Ter. And. Act v. Sc. 4. | her happiness. In the general, indeed, she Shall you escape with impunity: you who lay snareg
is a person of so strict justice that she marfor young men of a liberal education, but unacquainted ries a poor gallant to a rich wench, and a with the world, and by force of importunity and pro
moneyless girl to a man of fortune. But mises, draw them in to marry barlots?
then she has no manner of conscience in The other day passed by me in her cha the disparity, when she has a mind to imriot a lady with that pale and wan com- pose a poor rogue for one of an estate:'she plexion which we sometimes see in young |has no remorse in adding to it, that he is people who are fallen into sorrow, and illiterate, ignorant, and unfashioned; but private anxiety of mind, which antedate makes these imperfections arguments of age and sickness. It is not three years ago the truth of his wealth; and will on such an since she was gay, airy, and a little towards occasion, with a very grave face, charge libertine in her carriage; but, methought, the people of condition with negligence in I easily forgave her that little insolence, the education of their children. Exception which she so severely pays for in her pre- being made the other day against an ignosent condition. Flavilla, of whom I am rant booby of her own clothing, whom she speaking, is married to a sullen fool with was putting off for a rich heir: «Madam,' wealth. Her beauty and merit are lost upon said she, you know there is no making of the dolt, who is insensible of perfection in children, who know they have estates, atany thing. Their hours together are either tend their books." painful or insipid. The minutes she has to Sempronia, by these arts, is loaded with herself in his absence are not sufficient to presents, importuned for her acquaintance, give vent at her eyes, to the grief and tor- and admired by those who do not know the ment of his last conversation. This poor first taste of life, as a woman of exemplary creature was sacrificed (with a temper good breeding. But sure to murder and rob which, under the cultivation of a man of are less iniquities, than to raise profit by sense, would have made the most agreeable abuses as irreparable as taking away life; companion) into the arms of this loathsome but more grievous as making it lastingly yoke-fellow by Sempronia. Sempronia is a unhappy. To rob a lady at play of half her good lady, who supports herself in an af- fortune, is not so ill as giving the whole and fluent condition, by contracting friendship herself to an unworthy husband. But Semwith rich young widows, and maids of plen- pronia can administer consolation to an untiful fortunes at their own disposal, and be happy fair at home, by leading her to an stowing her friends upon worthless indigent agreeable gallant elsewhere. She then can fellows; on the other side, she ensnares in- preach the general condition of all the considerate and rash youths of great estates married world, and tell an unexperienced into the arms of vicious women. For this young woman the methods of softening her purpose, she is accomplished in all the arts affliction, and laugh at her simplicity and which can make her acceptable at imperti-want of knowledge, with an ‘Oh! my dear, nent visits; she knows all that passes in you will know better.' every quarter, and is well acquainted with The wickedness of Sempronia, one would all the favourite servants, busy-bodies, de- think, should be superlative: but I cannot pendents, and poor relations, of all persons but esteem that of some parents equal to it: of condition in the whole town. At the price I mean such as sacrifice the greatest endowof a good sum of money, Sempronia, by the ments and qualifications to base bargains.
A parent who forces a child of a liberal and man deserves the least indulgence imagiingenious* spirit into the arms of a clown or nable. It is said, it is soon over; that is, all a blockhead, obliges her to a crime too the mischief he does is quickly despatched, odious for a name. It is in a degree the which, I think, is no great recommendation unnatural conjunction of rational and brutal to favour. I have known one of those good. beings. Yet what is there so common, as natured passionate men say in a mixed the bestowing an accomplished woman with company, even to his own wife or child, such a disparity? And I could name crowds such things as the most inveterate enemy who lead miserable lives for want of know- of his family would not have spoken, even ledge in their parents of this maxim. That in imagination. It is certain that quick good sense and good-nature always go sensibility is inseparable from a ready untogether. That which is attributed to fools, derstanding; but why should not that good and called good-nature, is only an inability understanding call to itself all its force on of observing what is faulty, which turns, in such occasions, to master that sudden inclimarriage, into a suspicion of every thing as nation to anger? One of the greatest sculs such, from a consciousness of that inability, now in the world* is the most subject by na"MR. SPECTATOR, I am entirely of your
ture to anger, and yet so famous for a con
quest of himself this way, that he is the opinion with relation to the equestrian fe
known example when you talk of temper males, who affect both the masculine and
and command of a man's self. To contain feminine air at the same time; and cannot
the spirit of anger, is the worthiest disciforbear making a presentment against an
I pline we can put ourselves to. When a other order of them, who grow very nu
man has made any progress this way, a merous and powerful; and since our lan
frivolous fellow in a passion is to him as guage is not very capable of good com
contemptible as a froward child. It ought pound words, I must be contented to call
to be the study of every man, for his own them only “the naked-shouldered." These
quiet and peace. When he stands combeauties are not contented to make lovers
bustible and ready to fame upon every thing wherever they appear, but they must make
that touches him, life is as uneasy to himrivals at the same time. Were you to see
self as it is to all about him, Syncropius Gatty walk the Park at high mall, you
leads, of all men living, the most ridiculous would expect those who followed her and
10 | life; he is ever offending and begging parthose who met her would immediately draw
| don. If his man enters the room without their swords for her. I hope, sir, you will
what he was sent for—'That blockhead,' provide for the future, that women may begins he-'Gentlemen, I ask your parstick to their faces for doing any farther
don, but servants now-a-days'-The wrong mischief, and not allow any but direct tra
plates are laid, they are thrown into the ders in beauty to expose more than the
middle of the room: his wife stands by in fore-part of the neck, unless you please to
pain for him, which he sees in her face, and allow this after-game to those who are very
answers as if he had heard all she was defective in the charms of the countenance.
thinking:-Why? what the devil! Why I can say, to my sorrow, the present prac
don't you take care to give orders in these tice is very unfair, when to look back is thingsHist
things?' His friends sit down to a tasteless death; and it may be said of our beauties, as
plenty of every thing, every minute expecta great poet did of bullets,
ing new insults from his impertinent pas“ They kill and wound, like Parthians, as they fly."
sions. In a word, to eat with, or visit SynI submit this to your animadversion; and cropius, is no other than going to see him am, for the little while I have left, your exercise his family, exercise their patience, humble servant, the languishing
and his own anger. PHILANTHUS.
It is monstrous that the shame and con•P. S. Suppose you mended my letter,
fusion in which this good-natured angry and made a simile about the "porcupine;"
nine man must needs behold his friends, while but I submit that also.'
he thus lays about him, does not give him so much reflection as to create an amendment. This is the most scandalous disuse
of reason imaginable; all the harmless part No. 438.] Wednesday, July 23, 1712. of him is no more than that of a bull-dog,
they are tame no longer than they are not Animum rege, qui, nisi paret, Imperat
Hor. Ep. ii. Lib. 1. 62. offended. One of these good-natured angry --Curb thy soul,
men shall, in an instant, assemble together And check thy rage, which must be rul'd or rule. so many allusions to secret circumstances,
as are enough to dissolve the peace of all It is a very common expression, that such the families and friends he is acquainted a one is very good-natured, but very pas- with, in a quarter of an hour, and yet the sionate. The expression, indeed, is very next moment be the best natured man in good-natured, to allow passionate people the world. If you would see passion in its so much quarter; but I think a passionate purity, without mixture of reason, behold it represented in a mad hero, drawn by a lost, and I know not to whom I lent it, it is mad poet. Nat. Lee makes his Alexander so many years ago.' Then, sir, here is the say thus:
* Lord Somers.
other volume; I'll send you home that, and • Away! begone! and give a whirlwind room, please to pay for both.' 'My friend,' reOr I will blow you up like dust! Avaunt!
plied he, 'canst thou be so senseless as not Madness but meanly represents my toil, Eternal discord!
to know that one volume is as imperfect in Fury! revenge! disdain and indignation !
my library as in your shop?' 'Yes, sir, but Tear my swol'n breast, make way for fire and tempest. My brain is burst, debate and reason quenchid; The storm is up, and my hot bleeding heart
be short, I will be paid.' 'Sir,' answered Splits with the rack ; while passions, like the wind, the chapman, you are a young man, your Rise up to heav'n, and put out all the stars.'
book is lost; and learn by this little loss to Every passionate fellow in town talks half bear much greater adversities, which you the day with as little consistency, and must expect to meet with.' • Yes, I'll bear threatens things as much out of his power. when I must, but I have not lost now, for I
The next disagreeable person to the out- say you have it, and shall pay me.' Friend, rageous gentleman, is one of a much lower you grow warm; I tell you the book is lost; order of anger, and he is what we commonly and foresce, in the course even of a proscall a peevish fellow. A peevish fellow is perous life, that you will meet afflictions to one who has some reason in himself for make you mad, if you cannot bear this being out of humour, or has a natural inca-trifle.' 'Sir, there is, in this case, no need pacity for delight, and therefore disturbs all of bearing, for you have the book.' •I say, who are happier than himself with pishes sir, I have not the book; but your passion and pshaws, or other well-bred interjec-will not let you hear enough to be informed tions, at every thing that is said or done in that I have it not. Learn resignation of his presence. There should be physic yourself to the distresses of this life: nay, mixed in the food of all which these fellows do not fret and fume; it is my duty to tell eat in good company. This degree of anger you that you are of an impatient spirit, and passes, forsooth, for a delicacy of judgment, an impatient spirit is never without woe.' that won't admit of being easily pleased; Was ever any thing like this? Yes, sir, but none above the character of wearing a there have been many things like this: the peevish man's livery ought to bear with his loss is but a trife; but your temper is wanill manners. All things among men of sense ton, and incapable of the least pain; thereand condition should pass the censure, and fore let me advise you, be patient, the book have the protection of the eye of reason. is lost, but do not for that reason lose your
No man ought to be tolerated in an habi-self.' tual humour, whim, or particularity of behaviour, by any who do not wait upon him for bread. Next to the peevish fellow is
No. 439.] Thursday, July 24, 1712. the snarler. This gentleman deals mightily in what we call the irony; and as those Hi narrata ferunt alio : mensuraque ficti sort of people exert themselves most against Crescit; et auditis aliquid novus adjicit auctor. those below them, you see their humour
Ovid, Met. xij. 57. best in their talk to their servants. That
Some tell what they have heard, or tales devise :
Each fiction still improv'd with added lies. is so like you; You are a fine fellow; Thou art the quickest head-piece;' and the like.
Ovid describes the palace of Fame as One would think the hectoring, the storm- situated in the very centre of the universe, ing, the sullen, and all the different species and perforated with so many windows as and subordinations of the angry should be gave her the sight of every thing that was cured, by knowing they live only as par
vas par- done in the heavens, in the earth, and in doned men; and how pitiful is the condition the sea. The structure of it was contrived of being only suffered! But I am inter- in so admirable a manner, that it echoed rupted by the pleasantest scene of anger,
every word which was spoken in the whole and the disappointment of it, that I have
pointment of it. that I have compass of nature; so that the palace, says ever known, which happened while I was the poet, was always filled with a confused yet writing, and I overheard as I sat in the hubbub of low, dying sounds, the voices back-room at a French bookseller's. There being almost spent and worn out before they came into the shop a very learned man with arrived at this general rendezvous of an erect solemn air; and, though a person, speeches and whispers. of great parts otherwise, slow in under- I consider courts with the same regard to standing any thing which makes against the governments which they superintend, himself. The composure of the faulty man, as Ovid's palace of Fame with regard to and the whimsical perplexity of him that the universe. The eyes of a watchful miwas justly angry, is perfectly new. After nister run through the whole people. There turning over many volumes, said the seller is scarce a murmur or complaint that does to the buyer, 'Sir, you know I have long asked you to send me back the first volume
* By Steele. See No. 324, ad finem. of French sermons I formerly lent you.' Louis scene passed in the Sup
This scene passed in the shop of Mr. Vaillant, now •Sir,' said the chapman, 'I have often look
it was (for it is still in remembrance) & volume of Mas. ed for it, but cannot find it; it is certainly I sillon's Sermons.