Jul. O, cry your mercy, Sir, I have mistook;

This is the ring you sent to Silvia. [Shews another ring. Pro. But how cam'st thou by this ring? at my depart,

I gave this unto Julia.

Jul. And Julia herself did give it me;
And Julia herself hath brought it hither.
Pro. How! Julia!

Jul. Behold her that gave aim to all thy oaths,
And entertain'd them deeply in her heart:
How oft hast thou with perjury cleft the root!
O Proteus, let this habit make thee blush!
Be thou ashamed, that I have took upon me
Such an immodest raiment; if shame live
In a disguise of love:

It is the lesser blot modesty finds,

Women to change their shapes, than men their minds. Pro. Than men their minds! 'tis true: O heaven!

were man

But constant, he were perfect: that one error
Fills him with faults; makes him run through all sins:
Inconstancy falls off, ere it begins:

What is in Silvia's face, but I may spy

More fresh in Julia's, with a constant eye?

Val. Come, come, a hand from either:

Let me be blest to make this happy close;
Twere pity two such friends should be long foes.

Pro. Bear witness, heaven, I have my wish for ever.
Jul. And I have mine.

Enter Outlaws, with DUKE and THURIO Out A prize, a prize, a prize!

Val Forbear, 1 say; it is my the duke

Your grace is welcome to a man disgraced, Banish'd Valentine.

Duke. Sir Valentine!

Thu. Yonder is Silvia; and Silvia's mine.

Val. Thurio, give back, or else embrace thy death;
Come not within the measure of my wrath :
Do not name Silvia thine; if once again,
Milan shall not behold thee. Here she stands,
Take but possession of her with a touch ;-
I dare thee but to breathe upon my love.-
Thu. Sir Valentine, I care not for her, I;
I hold him but a fool, that will endanger
His body for a girl that loves him not:

I claim her not, and therefore she is thine.
Duke. The more degenerate and base art thou,
To make such means for her as thou hast done,
And leave her on such slight conditions.-
Now, by the honour of my ancestry,

I do applaud thy spirit, Valentine,
And think thee worthy of an empress' love.
Know then, I here forget all former griefs,
Cancel all grudge, repeal thee home again.-
Plead a new state in thy unrivall'd merit,
To which I thus subscribe,-Sir Valentine,
Thou art a gentleman, and well derived;

Take thou thy Silvia, for thou hast deserved her.

Val. I thank your grace; the gift hath made me [happy.

I now beseech you, for your daughter's sake,

To grant one boon that I shall ask of you.

Duke. I grant it, for thine own, whate'er it be.
Val. These banish'd men, that I have kept withal,
Are men endued with worthy qualities;

Forgive them what they have committed here,
And let them be recall'd from their exile:

They are reform'd, civil, full of good,

And fit for great employment, worthy lord.

Duke. Thou hast prevail'd: 1 pardon them and thee, Dispose of them, as thou know'st their deserts. Come, let us go; we will include all jars With triumphs, mirth, and rare solemnity.

Val. And, as we walk along, I dare be bold With our discourse to make your grace to smile: What think you of this page, my lord?

Duke. I think the boy hath grace in him; he blushes.
Val. I warrant you, my lord; more grace than boy.
Duke. What mean you by that saying?
Val. Please you, I'll tell you as we pass along,
That you will wonder what hath fortuned.-
Come, Proteus; 'tis your penance but to hear
The story of your loves discover'd:

That done, our day of marriage shall be yours;
One feast, one house, one mutual happiness.

[Exeun

Slen. I may quarter, coz ?

Shal. You may, by marrying.

Era. It is marring indeed, if he quarter it.
Shal. Not a whit.

Eva. Yes, py'r-lady; if he has a quarter of your coat, there is but three skirts for yourself, in my simple conJectures: but that is all one. If Sir John Falstaff have committed disparagements unto you, I am of the church, and will be glad to do my benevolence, to make atonements and compromises between you. Shal. The Council shall hear it; it is a riot. Era. It is not meet the Council hear a riot; there is no fear of Got in a riot: the Council, look you, shall desire to hear the fear of Got, and not to hear a riot; take your vizaments in that.

Shal. Ha! o' my life, if I were young again, the sword should end it.

Era. It is petter that friends is the sword, and end it: and there is also another device in my prain, which, peradventure, prings goot discretions with it. There is Anne Page, which is daughter to master George Page, which is pretty virginity.

Slen. Mistress Anne Page? She has brown hair, and speaks small like a woman.

Eva. It is that fery verson for all the 'orld, as just as you will desire; and seven hundred pounds of monies, and gold, and silver, is her grandsire, upon his death'sbed, (Got deliver to a joyful resurrections!) give, when she is able to overtake seventeen years old: it were a goot motion, if we leave our pribbles and prabbles, and desire a marriage between master Abraham and mistress Anne Page.

Shal. Did her grandsire leave her seven hundred pound?

Era. Ay, and her father is make her a petter penny. Shal. I know the young gentlewoman; she has good gifts.

Eva. Seven hundred pounds, and possibilities, is good gifts.

Shal. Well, let us see honest master Page. Is Falstaff there?

Era. Shall I tell you a lie? I do despise a liar, as I

do despise one that is false; or, as I despise one that is not true. The knight, Sir John, is there; and, I beseech you, be ruled by your well-willers. I will peat the door [knocks] for master Page. What, hoa! Got pless your house here!

Enter PAGE.

Page. Who's there?

Eva. Here is Got's plessing, and your friend, and justice Shallow and here young master Slender; that, peradventures, shall tell you another tale, if matters grow to your likings.

Page. I am glad to see your worships well: I thank you for my venison, master Shallow.

Shal. Master Page, I am glad to see you: much good do it your good heart! I wished your venison better; it was ill kill'd.-How doth good mistress Page?-and 1 love you always with my heart, la; with my heart. Page. Sir, I thank you.

Shal. Sir, I thank you; by yea and no, I do. Page. I am glad to see you, good master Slender. Slen. How does your fallow greyhound, Sir? I heard say, he was out-run on Cotsale.

Page. It could not be judged, Sir.

Slen. You'll not 'confess, you'll not confess.

Shal. That he will not;-'tis your fault, 'tis your fault-Tis a good dog.

Page. A cur, Sir.

Shal. Sir, he's a good dog, and a fair dog; can there be more said? he is good, and fair.-Is Sir John Falstaf here?

Page. Sir, he is within; and I would I could do a good office between you.

Eva. It is spoke as a Christians ought to speak.
Shal. He hath wrong'd me, master Page.
Page. Sir, he doth in some sort confess it.

Shal. If it be confess'd, it is not redress'd; is not that so, master Page? He hath wrong'd me; indeed, he hath; at a word, he hath ;-believe me;-Robert Shallow, esquire, saith, he is wrong'd.

Page. Here comes Sir John.

Enter Sir JOHN FALSTAFF, BARDOLPH, NYм, and PISTOL Fal. Now, master Shallow; you'll complain of me to the king?

Shal. Knight, you have beaten my men, killed my deer, and broke open my lodge.

Fal. But not kiss'd your keeper's daughter?
Shal. Tut, a pin! this shall be answer'd.

Fal. I will answer it straight;-I have done all this. -That is now answer'd.

Shal. The Council shall know this.

Fal. "Twere better for you, if it were known in counsel: you'H be laugh'd at.

Eva. Pauca verba, Sir John, good worts. Fal. Good worts! good cabbage.-Slender, I broke your head what matter have you against me?

Slen. Marry, Sir, I have matter in my head against you; and against your coney-catching rascals, Bardolph, Nym, and Pistol. They carried me to the tavern, and made me drunk, and afterwards picked my pocket. Bard. You Banbury cheese! Slen. Ay, it is no matter.

Pist. How now, Mephostophilus?
Slen. Ay, it is no matter.

Nym. Slice, I say! pauca, pauca; slice! that's my humour.

Slen. Where's Simple, my man?-can you tell, cousin! Eva. Peace: I pray vou! Now let us understand

Eva. No; it is false, if it is a pick-purse. Pist. Ha, thou mountain-foreigner!-Sir John, and I combat challenge of this latten bilbo: [master mine, Word of denial in thy labras here;

Word of denial: froth and scum, thou liest.

Slen. By these gloves, then, 'twas he.

Nym. Be advised, Sir, and pass good humours: I will say, marry trap," with you, if you run the nuthook's humour on me; that is the very note of it.

Slen. By this hat, then, he in the red face had it: for though I cannot remember what I did when you made me drunk, yet I am not altogether an ass.

Fal. What say you, Scarlet and John? Bard. Why, Sir, for my part, I say, the gentleman had drunk himself out of his five sentences.

Eva. It is his five senses: fie, what the ignorance is! Bard. And being fap, Sir, was, as they say, cashier'd; and so conclusions pass'd the careires.

Slen. Ay, you spake in Latin then too; but 'tis no matter: I'll ne'er be drunk whilst I live again, but in honest, civil, godly company, for this trick: if I be drunk, I'll be drunk with those that have the fear of God, and not with drunken knaves.

Eva. So Got 'udge me, that is a virtuous mind. Fal. You hear all these matters denied, gentlemen; you hear it.

within.

Enter Mistress ANNE PAGE with wine; Mistress FORD and Mistress PAGE following. Page. Nay, daughter, carry the wine in; we'll drink [Exit ANNE PAGE. Slen. O heavens! this is mistress Anne Page. Page. How now, mistress Ford? Fal. Mistress Ford, by my troth, you are very well met: by your leave, good mistress. [Kissing her. Page. Wife, bid these gentlemen welcome.-Come, we have a hot venison pasty to dinner; come, gentlemen, I hope we shall drink down all unkindness.

[Exeunt all but SHALLOW, SLENDER, and EVANS. Slen. I had rather than forty shillings, I had my Book of Songs and Sonnets here.

Enter SIMPLE.

How now, Simple! Where have you been? I must wait on myself, must I? You have not "The Book of Riddles" about you, have you?

Sim. "Book of Riddles!" why, did you not lend it to Alice Shortcake upon Allhallowmas last, a fortnight afore Michaelmas?

A

Shal. Come, coz; come, coz; we stay for you. word with you, coz; marry, this, coz: there is, as 'twere, a tender, a kind of tender, made afar off by Sir Hugh here. Do you understand me?

Slen. Ay, Sir, you shall find me reasonable; if it be so, I shall do that that is reason.

Shal. Nay, but understand me.
Slen. So I do, Sir.

Eva. Give ear to his motions, master Slender: I will description the matter to you, if you be capacity of it.

Slen. Nay, I will do as my cousin Shallow says: I pray you pardon me; he's a justice of peace in his country, simple though I stand here.

Eva. But that is not the question; the question is concerning your marriage.

Shal. Ay, there's the point, Sir.

Eva. Marry, is it; the very point of it to mistress Anne Page.

Slen. Why, if it be so, I will marry her upon any reasonable demands.

Eva. But can you affection the 'oman? Let us command to know that of your mouth, or of your lips; for divers philosophers hold, that the lips is parcel of the

mouth therefore, precisely, can you carry your goodwill to the maid?

Shal. Cousin Abraham Slender, can you love her? Slen. I hope, Sir,-I will do, as it shall become one that would do reason.

Era. Nay, Got's lords and his ladies, you must speak possitable, if you can carry her your desires towards her. Shal. That you must. Will you, upon good dowry.

marry her?

Slen. I will do a greater thing than that, upon your request, cousin, in any reason.

Shal. Nay, conceive me, conceive me, sweet coz; what I do is to pleasure you, coz. Can you love the maid? Slen. I will marry her, Sir, at your request; but if there be no great love in the beginning, yet Heaven may decrease it upon better acquaintance, when we are married, and have more occasion to know one another: I hope, upon familiarity will grow more contempt: but if you say, "marry her," I will marry her; that I am freely dissolved, and dissolutely.

Eva. It is a fery discretion answer; save, the faul' is in the 'ort dissolutely; the 'ort is, according to our meaning, resolutely;-his meaning is good.

Shal. Ay, I think my cousin meant well.

Slen. Ay, or else I would I might be hanged, la.

Re-enter ANNE PAGE.

Shal. Here comes fair mistress Anne. Would I were young, for your sake, mistress Anne!

Anne. The dinner is on the table; my father desires your worships' company.

Shal. I will wait on him, fair mistress Anne. Eea. Od's plessed will! I will not be absence at the grace. [Exeunt SHALLOW and Sir II. EVANS. Anne. Will't please your worship to come in, Sir? Slen. No, I thank you, forsooth, heartily: I am very well.

Anne. The dinner attends you, Sir.

Slen. I am not a-hungry, I thank you, forsooth. Go, sirrah, for all you are my man, go, wait upon my cousin Shallow. [Exit SIMPLE.] A justice of peace sometime may be beholden to his friend for a man.-I keep but three men and a boy yet, till my mother be dead: but what though? yet I live like a poor gentleman born.

Anne. I may not go in without your worship: they will not sit till you come.

Slen. I' faith, I'll eat nothing; I thank you as much as though I did.

Anne. I pray you, Sir, walk in.

Slen. I had rather walk here, I thank you; I bruised my shin the other day with playing at sword and dagger with a master of fence, three veneys for a dish of stewed prunes; and, by my troth, I cannot abide the smell of hot meat since. Why do your dogs bark so? be there

bears i' the town?

SCENE III-A Room in the Garter Inn. Enter FALSTAFF, Host, BARDOLPH, NYM, PISTOL, and ROBIN.

Fal. Mine host of the Garter,

Host. What says my bully-rook? Speak scholarly and wisely.

Fal. Truly, mine host, I must turn away some of my followers.

Host. Discard, bully Hercules; cashier: let them wag; trot, trot.

Fal. I sit at ten pounds a week.

Host. Thou'rt an emperor, Cæsar, Keisar, and Pheezar. I will entertain Bardolph; he shall draw, he shall tap said I well, bully Hector?

Fal. Do so, good mine host.

Host. I have spoke; let him follow. Let me see thee froth and lime: I am at a word; follow. [Exit Host. Fal. Bardolph, follow him: a tapster is a good trade: an old cloak makes a new jerkin; a withered servingman, a fresh tapster: go; adieu.

Bard. It is a life that I have desired; I will thrive. [Exit BARD.

Pist. O base Gongarian wight! wilt thou the spigot wield?

Nym. He was gotten in drink: is not the humour conceited? His mind is not heroic, and there's the humour of it.

Fal. I am glad I am so acquit of this tinder-box; his thefts were too open: his filching was like an unskilful singer, he kept not time.

Nym. The good humour is, to steal at a minute's rest. Pist. Convey, the wise it call. "Steal!" foh; a fico for the phrase

Fal. Well, Sirs, I am almost out at heels.

Pist. Why then, let kibes ensue.

Fal. There is no remedy: I must coney-catch; I must shift.

Pist. Young ravens must have food.

Fal. Which of you know Ford of this town?
Pist. I ken the wight; he is of substance good.
Fal. My honest lads, I will tell you what I am about.
Pist. Two yards, and more.

Fal. No quips now, Pistol; indeed I am in the waist two yards about: but I am now about no waste: I am about thrift. Briefly, I do mean to make love to Ford's wife; I spy entertainment in her; she discourses, she carves, she gives the leer of invitation: I can construe the action of her familiar style; and the hardest voice of her behaviour, to be Englished rightly, is, "I am Sir John Falstaff's."

Pist. He hath studied her well, and translated her well; out of honesty into English.

Nym. The anchor is deep: will that humour pass? Fal Now, the report goes, she has all the rule of her husband's purse; she hath legions of angels.

Pist. As many devils entertain; and, "To her, boy," say I.

Vym. The humour rises; it is good: humour me the angels.

Fal. I have writ me here a letter to her; and here another to Page's wife; who even now gave me good eyes too, examined my parts with most judicious eyeads; sometimes the beam of her view gilded my foot, sometimes my portly belly.

Pist. Then did the sun on dunghill shine.
Nym. I thank thee for that humour.

Fal. O, she did so course o'er my exteriors with such a greedy intention, that the appetite of her eye did Beem to scorch me up like a burning-glass! Here's another letter to her: she bears the purse too; she is a region in Guiana, all gold and bounty. I will be cheater to them both, and they shall be exchequers to me; they shall be my East and West Indies, and I will trade to them both. Go, bear thou this letter to mistress Page; and thou this to mistress Ford: we will thrive, lads, we will thrive.

Pist. Shall I Sir Pandarus of Troy become,
And by my side wear steel? then, Lucifer take all!

Nym. I will run no base humour; here, take the humour letter; I will keep the 'haviour of reputation. Fal. Hold, sirrah, [To ROB.] bear you these letters Sail like my pinnace to these golden shores. [tightly; Rogues, hence! avaunt! vanish like hailstones, go; fridge, plod, away, o' the hoof; seek shelter, pack!

SCENE IV.-A Room in Dr CAIUS's House.

Enter Mistress QUICKLY, SIMPLE, and RUGBY. Quick. What; John Rugby!-I pray thee, go to the casement, and see if you can see my master, master Doctor Caius, coming: if he do, i' faith, and find any body in the house, here will be an old abusing of God's patience and the king's English.

Rug. I'll go watch. [Exit RUGBY. Quick. Go; and we'll have a posset for't soon at night, in faith, at the latter end of a sea-coal fire. An honest, willing, kind fellow, as ever servant shall come in house withal; and, I warrant you, no tell-tale, nor no breed-bate: his worst fault is, that he is given to prayer; he is something peevish that way: but nobody but has his fault;-but let that pass. Peter Simple you say your name is?

Sim. Ay, for fault of a better.

Quick. And master Slender's your master?
Sim. Ay, forsooth.

Quick. Does he not wear a great round beard, like a glover's paring-knife?

Sim. No, forsooth: he hath but a little wee face, with

a little yellow beard; a Cain-coloured beard. Quick. A softly-sprighted man, is he not?

Sim. Ay, forsooth: but he is as tall a man of his hands, as any is between this and his head; he hath fought with a warrener.

Quick. How say you?-0, I should remember him. Does he not hold up his head, as it were, and strut in his gait?

Sim. Yes, indeed, does he.

Quick. Well, heaven send Anne Page no worse fortune! Tell master parson Evans, I will do what I can for your master: Anne is a good girl, and I wish

Re-enter RUGBY.

Rug. Out, alas! here comes my master.

Quick. We shall all be shent: run in here, good young man; go into this closet. [Shuts SIMPLE in the closet.] He will not stay long.-What, John Rugby! John, what, John, I say!-Go, John, go inquire for my master; I doubt, he be not well, that he comes not home:-"and down, down, adown-a," &c. [Sings.

Enter Doctor CAIUS.

Caius. Vat is you sing? I do not like dese toys. Pray you, go and vetch me in my closet un boitier verd; a box, a green-a box; do intend vat I speak? a green-a box.

Quick. Ay, forsooth, I'll fetch it you. I am glad he went not in himself; if he had found the young man, he would have been horn-mad. [Aside.

Caius. Fe, fe, fe, fe! ma foi, il fait fort chaud. Je m'en vais à la Cour,-la grand affaire.

Quick. Is it this, Sir?

Caius. Ouy; mette le au mon pocket; Depeche, quickly-Vere is dat knave Rugby?

Quick. What, John Rugby! John!
Rug. Here, Sir.

Caius. You are John Rugby, and you are Jack Rugby come, take-a your rapier, and come after my heel to de court.

Rug. 'Tis ready, Sir, here in the porch.

Caius. By my trot, I tarry too long.-Od's me! Qu'ay j'oublié dere is some simples in my closet, dat I vill not for the varld I shall leave behind.

Quick. Ah me! he'll find the young man there, and be mad.

Caius. O diable, diable! vat is in my closet?-Villany? larron! [Pulling SIMPLE out.] Rugby, my rapier. Quick. Good master, be content.

Caius. Verefore shall I be content-a?
Quick. The young man is an honest man

Caius. Vat shall de honest man do in my closet? lere is no honest man dat shall come in my closet.

Quick. I beseech you, be not so phlegmatic; hear the truth of it: he came of an errand to me from parson Hugh.

Caius. Vell.

Sim. Ay, forsooth, to desire her to

Quick. Peace, I pray you.

Caius. Peace-a your tongue :-Speak-a your tale. Sim. To desire this honest gentlewoman, your maid, to speak a good word to mistress Anne Page for my master, in the way of marriage.

Quick. This is all, indeed, la; but I'll ne'er put my finger in the fire, and need not.

Caius. Sir Hugh send-a you?-Rugby, baillez me [Writes. some paper:-Tarry you a little-a while.

Quick. I am glad he is so quiet: if he had been thoroughly moved, you should have heard him so loud, and so melancholy;-but notwithstanding, man, I'll do your master what good I can: and the very yea and the no is, the French Doctor, my master,-I may call him my master, look you, for I keep his house; and I wash, wring, brew, bake, scour, dress meat and drink, make the beds, and do all myself;

Sim. 'Tis a great charge, to come under one body's hand.

Quick. Are you avised o' that? you shall find it a great charge: and to be up early, and down late;-but notwithstanding, (to tell you in your ear; I would have no words of it;) my master himself is in love with mistress Anne Page: but notwithstanding that,-I know Anne's mind,-that's neither here nor there.

Caius. You jack'nape; give-a dis letter to Sir Hugh; by gar, it is a shallenge: I vill cut his troat in de park; and I vill teach a scurvy jack-a-nape priest to meddle or make-you may be gone; it is not good you tarry here:-By gar, I vill cut all his two stones; by gar, he shall not have a stone to trow at his dog.

[Exit SIMPLE. Quick. Alas, he speaks but for his friend. Caius. It is no matter-a for dat:-Do not you tell-a me dat I shall have Anne Page for myself?-by gar, I vill kill de Jack priest; and I have appointed mine host of de Jarterre to measure our weapon :—by gar, I vill myself have Anne Page.

Quick. Sir, the maid loves you, and all shall be well: we must give folks leave to prate: what, the good-jer! Caius. Rugby, come to the court vit me;-by gar, if I have not Anne Page, I shall turn your head out of my door-Follow my heels, Rugby.

[Exeunt CAIUS and RUGBY.

Quick. You shall have An fool's-head of your own. No, I know Anne's mind for that: never a woman in Windsor knows more of Anne's mind than I do; nor can do more than I do with her, I thank heaven. Fent. [Within.] Who's within there, ho?

Quick. Who's there, I trow? Come near the house, I pray you.

Enter FENTON.

Fent. How now, good woman! how dost thou? Quick. The better that it pleases your good worship

to ask.

Fent. What news? how does pretty mistress Anne? Quick. In truth, Sir, and she is pretty, and honest, and gentle; and one that is your friend, I can tell you that by the way; I praise heaven for it.

Fent. Shall I do any good, thinkest thou? Shall I not lose my suit?

Quick. Troth, Sir, all is in his hands above: but notwithstanding, master Fenton, I'll be sworn on a book, she loves you:-Have not your worship a wart above your eye?

Fent. Yes, marry, have I; what of that?

Quick. Well, thereby hangs a tail;-good faith, it is such another Nan:-but, I detest, an honest maid as ever broke bread :-We had an hour's talk of that wart; I shall never laugh but in that maid's company!-But, indeed, she is given too much to allicholy and musing: but for you-Well, go to.

Fent. Well, I shall see her to-day. Hold, there's money for thee; let me have thy voice in my behalf: if thou seest her before me, commend me

Quick. Will I? i' faith, that we will: and I will tell

SCENE I.—Before PAGE's House.
Enter Mistress PAGE, with a letter.

Mrs Page. What! have I 'scaped love-letters in the holiday time of my beauty, and am I now a subject for them? Let me see :[Reads.

"Ask me no reason why I love you; for though love use reason for his precisian, he admits him not for his counsellor. You are not young, no more am I; go to then, there's sympathy: you are merry, so am I; ha! ha! then there's more sympathy: you love sack, and so do I; would you desire better sympathy? Let it suffice thee, mistress Page, (at the least, if the love of a soldier can suffice,) that I love thee. I will not say. pity me, 'tis not a soldier-like phrase; but I say, love me. By me, "Thine own true knight,

By day or night,

Or any kind of light, With all his might, For thee to fight,

JOHN FALSTAFF."

What a Herod of Jewry is this?-O wicked, wicked world-one that is well-nigh worn to pieces with age, to shew himself a young gallant! What an unweighed behaviour hath this Flemish drunkard picked (with the devil's name) out of my conversation, that he dares in this manner assay me? Why, he hath not been thrice in my company!-What should I say to him?—I was then frugal of my mirth :-heaven forgive me!-Why, I'll exhibit a bill in the parliament for the putting down of men. How shall I be revenged on him? for revenged I will be, as sure as his guts are made of puddings.

Enter Mistress FORD.

Mrs Ford. Mistress Page! trust me, I was going to your house.

Mrs Page. And, trust me, I was coming to you. You look very ill.

Mrs Ford. Nay, I'll ne'er believe that; I have to shew to the contrary.

Mrs Page. 'Faith, but you do, in my mind.

Mrs Ford. Well, I do then; yet, I say, I could shew you to the contrary: 0, mistress Page, give me some counsel!

Mrs Page. What's the matter, woman?

Mrs Ford. O woman, if it were not for one trifling respect, I could come to such honour!

Mrs Page. Hang the trifle, woman; take the honour: what is it?-dispense with trifles;-what is it?

Mrs Ford. If I would but go to hell for an eternal moment, or so, I could be knighted.

Mrs Page. What!-thou liest!-Sir Alice Ford!These knights will hack; and so thou shouldst not alter the article of thy gentry.

Mrs Ford. We burn daylight:-here, read, read;perceive how I might be knighted.-I shall think the worse of fat men as long as I have an eye to make difference of men's liking: and yet he would not swear; praised women's modesty: and gave such orderly and well-behaved reproof to all uncomeliness, that I would have sworn his disposition would have gone to the truth of his words: but they do no more adhere and keep place together, than the hundredth Psalm to the tune of "Green Sleeves." What tempest, I trow, threw this whale, with so many tuns of oil in his belly, ashore at Windsor? How shall I be revenged on him? I think, the best way were to entertain him with hope, till the wicked fire of lust have melted him in his own grease.— Did you ever hear the like?

Mrs Page. Letter for letter; but that the name of Page and Ford differs!-To thy great comfort in this mystery of ill opinions, here's the twin-brother of thy letter: but let thine inherit first; for, I protest, mine never shall. I warrant he hath a thousand of these letters, writ with blank space for different names, (sure more.) and these are of the second edition. He will print them, out of doubt; for he cares not what he puts