yet we have not seen each other since last | credit on her side, she was in arrear but five November was twelvemonth. hundred. She ordered her husband to buy in a couple of fresh coach-horses; and with no other loss than the death of two footmen, and a churchyard cough brought upon her coachman, she was clear in the world on the tenth of February last, and keeps so before-hand, that she pays every body their own, and yet makes daily new acquaintances.' She went on with a very good air, and fixing her eyes on her list, told me, she was obliged to ride about three miles and a half before she arrived at her own house.' I asked 'after what manner this list was taken; whether the persons writ their names to her, and desired that favour, or how she knew she was not cheated in her muster roll ?'--'The method we take,' says she, is, that the porter or servant who comes to the door, writes down all the names who come to see us, and all such are entitled to a return of their visit. But,' said I, madam, I presume those who are searching for each other, and know one another by messages, may be understood as candidates only for each other's favour; and that, after so many how-do-ye-does, you proceed to visit or not, as you like the run of each other's reputation or fortune.'-'You understand it aright,' said she; and we become friends, as soon as we are convinced that our dislike to each other may be of any consequence: for, to tell you truly,' said she, for it is in vain to hide any thing from a man of your penetration, general visits are not made out of good-will, but for fear of ill-will. Punctuality in this case is often a suspicious circumstance; and there is nothing so common as to have a lady say, "I hope she has heard nothing of what I said of her, that she grows so great with me !" But, in-ple and their relations. They are equally busy deed, my porter is so dull and negligent, that I fear he has not put down half the people I owe visits to. Madam,' said I, 'methinks it would be very proper if your gentleman-usher, or groom of the chamber, were always to keep an account, by way of debtor and creditor. I know a city lady who uses that method, which I think very laudable; for though: you may possibly, at the court end of the town, receive at the door, and light up better than within Temple-bar, yet I must do that justice to my friends, the ladies within the walls, to own, that they are much more exact in their correspondence. The lady I was going to mention as an example, has always the second apprentice out of the countinghouse for her own use on her visiting-day, and he sets down very methodically all the visits which are made her. I remember very well, that on the first of January last, when she made up her account for the year 1708, it stood thus: I know not whether this agreeable visitant was fired with the example of the lady I told her of, but she immediately vanished out of my sight, it being, it seems, as necessary a point of good-breeding, to go off as if you stole something out of the house, as it is to enter as if you came to fire it. I do not know one thing that contributes so much to the lessening the esteem men of sense have to the fair sex, as this article of visits. A young lady cannot be married, but all impertinents in town must be beating the tattoo from one quarter of the town to the other, to show they know what passes. If a man of honour should once in an age marry a woman of merit for her intrinsic value, the envious things are all in motion in an instant to make it known to the sisterhood as an indiscretion, and publish to the town how many pounds he might have had to have been troubled with one of them. After they are tired with that, the next thing is, to make their compliments to the married cou at a funeral, and the death of a person of quality is always attended with the murder of several sets of coach-horses and chairmen. In both cases, the visitants are wholly unaffected, either with joy or sorrow; for which reason, their congratulations and condolences are equally words of course; and one would be thought wonderfully ill-bred, that should build upon such expressions as encouragements to expect from them any instance of friendship. Thus are the true causes of living, and the solid pleasures in life, lost in show, imposture, and impertinence. As for my part, I think most of the misfortunes in families arise from the trifling way the women have in spending their time, and gratifying only their eyes and ears, instead of their reason and understanding. A fine young woman, bred under a visiting mother, knows all that is possible for her to be acquainted with by report, and sees the virtuous and the vicious used so indifferently, that the fears she is born with are abated, and desires indulged, in proportion to her love of that light and trifling conversation. I know I talk like an old man; but I must go on to say, that I think the general reception of mixed company, and the pretty fellows that are admitted at those assemblies, give a young woman so false an idea of life, that she is generally bred up with a scorn of that sort of merit in a man, which only can make her happy in marriage; and the wretch, to whose lot she falls, very often receives in his arms a coquette, with the refuse of a heart long before given away to a coxcomb. Having received from the society of uphold. ers sundry complaints of the obstinate and refractory behaviour of several dead persons, who have been guilty of very great outrages and and humbly hoped I would not condemn her for the ignorance of her accusers, who, according to their own words, had rather represented her killing, than dead.' She further alleged, 'That the expressions mentioned in the papers written to her were become mere words, and that she had been always ready to marry any of those who said they died for her; but that they made their escape as soon as they found themselves pitied or believed.' She ended her discourse, by desiring I would for the future settle the meaning of the words 'I die,' in letters of love. disorders, and by that means elapsed the proper time of their interment; and having, on the other hand, received many appeals from the aforesaid dead persons, wherein they desire to be heard before such their interment; I have set apart Wednesday, the twenty-first instant, as an extraordinary court-day for the hearing of both parties. If, therefore, any one can alledge why they, or any of their acquaintance, should or should not be buried, I desire they may be ready with their witnesses at that time, or that they will for ever after hold their tongues. N. B. This is the last hearing on this sub-air of innocence, that she easily gained credit, ject. No. 110.] Thursday, December 22, 1709. -Qua lucis miseris tam dira cupido Virg. Æn. vi. 721, Gods! can the wretches long for life again? Sheer-lane, December 21. Pitt. Mrs. Pindust behaved herself with such an and was acquitted. Upon which occasion, I gave it as a standing rule, that any person, who, in any letter, billet, or discourse, should tell a woman he died for her, should, if she pleased, be obliged to live with her, or be immediately interred upon such their own confession, without bail or mainprize.' It happened, that the very next who was brought before me was one of her admirers, who was indicted upon that very head. A letter, which he acknowledged to be his own hand, was read, in which were the following words: As soon as I had placed myself in my chair Cruel creature, I die for you.' It was observof judicature, I ordered my clerk, Mr. Lillie, able that he took snuff all the time his accusato read to the assembly, who were gathered to- tion was reading. I asked him, 'how he came gather according to notice, a certain declaration, to use these words, if he were not a dead man?' by way of charge, to open the purpose of my He told me, he was in love with the lady, and session, which tended only to this explanation, did not know any other way of telling her so; that as other courts were often called to demand and that all his acquaintance took the same the execution of persons dead in law; so this method.' Though I was moved with compas was held to give the last orders relating to those sion towards him, by reason of the weakness who are dead in reason. The solicitor of the of his parts, yet for example-sake I was forced new company of upholders near the Hay-market, to answer, Your sentence shall be a warning appeared in behalf of that useful society, and to all the rest of your companions, not to tell brought in an accusation of a young woman, lies for want of wit.' Upon this, he began to who herself stood at the bar before me. Mr. Lil- beat his snuff-box with a very saucy air; and lie read her indictment, which was in substance, opening it again, Faith, Isaac,' said he, thou That, whereas, Mrs. Rebecca Pindust, of the art a very unaccountable old fellow.-Pr'ythee, parish of Saint Martin-in-the-Fields, had, by who gave thee power of life and death? What the use of one instrument called a looking-glass, a-pox hast thou to do with ladies and lovers? and by the further use of certain attire, made I suppose thou wouldst have a man be in com. either of cambrick, muslin, or other linen wares, pany with his mistress, and say nothing to her. upon her head, attained to such an evil art and Dost thou call breaking a jest, telling a lie? magical force in the motion of her eyes and Ha! is that thy wisdom, old stiffrump, ha? turn of her countenance, that she, the said Re. He was going on with this insipid common-place becca, had put to death several young men of mirth, sometimes opening his box, sometimes the said parish; and that the said young men shutting it, then viewing the picture on the lid, had acknowledged in certain papers, commonly and then the workmanship of the hinge, when, called love-letters, which were produced in in the midst of his cloquence, I ordered his box court, gilded on the edges, and sealed with a to be taken from him; upon which he was imparticular wax, with certain amorous and en-mediately struck speechless, and carried off chanting words wrought upon the said scals, stone dead. that they died for the said Rebecca: and, whereas the said Rebecca persisted in the said evil practice; this way of life the said society construed to be, according to former edicts, a state of death, and demanded an order for the interment of the said Rebecca.' I looked upon the maid with great humanity, and desired her to make answer to what was said against her. She said, 'It was indeed true, that she had practised all the arts and means she could, to dispose of herself happily in mar. riage, but thought she did not come under the censure expressed in my writings for the same; The next who appeared was a hale old fellow of sixty. He was brought in by his relations, who desired leave to bury him. Upon requiring a distinct account of the prisoner, a credible witness deposed, that he always rose at ten of the clock, played with his cat until twelve, smoked tobacco until one, was at dinner until two, then took another pipe, played at backgammon until six, talked of one madam Frances, an old mistress of his, until eight, repeated the same account at the tavern until ten, then returned home, took the other pipe, and then to bed.' I asked him, what he had to say for himself? As to what,' said he, tion concerning Madam Frances they men- | new and unaccountable fashion. I shall, however, pronounce nothing upon it, until I have examined all that can be said for and against it. And, in the mean time, think fit to give this notice to the fair ladies who are now making up their winter suits, that they may abstain from all dresses of that kind, until they shall find what judgment will be passed upon them; for it would very much trouble me, that they should put themselves to an unnecessary expense; and I could not but think my self to blame, if I should hereafter forbid them the wearing of such garments, when they have laid out money upon them, without having given them any previous admonition. N. B. A letter of the sixteenth instant about one of the fifth, will be answered according to the desire of the party, which he will see in a few days. No. 111.] Saturday, December 24, 1709. Procul, O! Procul, este profani! I did not care for hearing the Canterbury tale, and, therefore, thought myself seasonably interrupted by a young gentleman, who appeared in the behalf of the old man, and prayed an arrest of judgment; for that he, the said young man, held certain lands by his, the said old man's, life.' Upon this, the solicitor of the upholders took an occasion to demand him also, and thereupon produced several evidences that witnessed to his life and conversation. It appeared, that each of them divided their hours in matters of equal moment and importance to themselves and to the public. They rose at the same hour while the old man was playing with his cat, the young one was looking out of his window; while the old man was smoking his pipe, the young man was rubbing his teeth; while one was at dinner, the other was dressing; while one was at back-gammon, the other was at dinner; while the old fellow was talking of madam Frances, the young one was either at play, or toasting women whom he never conversed with. The only difference was, that the young man had never been good for any thing; the old man, a man of worth before he knew madam Frances. Upon the whole, I ordered them to be both interred together, with inscripTHE watchman, who does me particular hotions proper to their characters, signifying, that nours, as being the chief man in the lane, gave the old man died in the year 1689, and was that I awakened at the knock, and heard my so very great a thump at my door last night, buried in the year 1709; and over the young oneself complimented with the usual salutation of, it was said, that he departed this world in the 'Good-morrow, Mr. Bickerstaff'; good-morrow, twenty-fifth year of his death. The next class of criminals were authors in my masters all.' The silence and darkness of prose and verse. Those of them who had pro-serious; and, as my attention was not drawn the night disposed me to be more than ordinarily duced any still-born work were immediately out among exterior objects by the avocations of dismissed to their burial, and were followed by others, who, notwithstanding some sprightly I was considering, amidst the stillness of the sense, my thoughts naturally fell upon myself. issue in their life-time, had given proofs of their death by some posthumous children that bore night, what was the proper employment of a no resemblance to their elder brethren. As for should propose to itself? and, what the end it thinking being? what were the perfections it those who were the fathers of a mixed progeny, should aim at? My mind is of such a parti provided always they could prove the last to be cular cast, that the falling of a shower of rain, a live child, they escaped with life, but not without loss of limbs; for, in this case, I was satisor the whistling of wind, at such a time, is apt fied with amputation of the parts which were solemn. I was in this disposition, when our to fill my thoughts with something awful and mortified. has been repeating to us every winter night for bellman began his midnight homily, which he these twenty years, with the usual exordium; Sheer-lane, December 23. These were followed by a great crowd of superannuated benchers of the inns of court, senior fellows of colleges, and defunct statesmen; all whom I ordered to be decimated inOh! mortal man, thou that art born in sin! differently, allowing the rest a reprieve for one Sentiments of this nature, which are in themyear, with a promise of a free pardon in case of selves just and reasonable, however debased by resuscitation. the circumstances that accompany them, do not There were still great multitudes to be ex-fail to produce their natural effect in a mind amined; but, finding it very late, I adjourned the court, not without the secret pleasure that I had done my duty, and furnished out a hand some execution. Going out of the court, I received a letter, informing me, that, in pursuance of the edict of justice in one of my late visions, all those of the fair sex began to appear pregnant who had run any hazard of it; as was manifest by a particular swelling in the petticoats of several ladies in and about this great city.' I must confess, I do not attribute the rising of this part of the dress to this occasion, yet must own, that I am very much disposed to be offended with such a that is not perverted and depraved by wrong notions of gallantry, politeness, and ridicule. The temper which I now found myself in, as well as the time of the year, put me in mind of those lines in Shakspeare, wherein, according to his agrecable wildness of imagination, he has wrought a country tradition into a beautiful piece of poetry. In the tragedy of Hamlet, where the ghost vanishes upon the cock's crówing,* he takes occasion to mention its crowing This is a very ancient superstition. Philostratus, giving an account of the apparition of Achilles's shade to Apollonius Tyaneus, says, that it vanished with a little glimmer as soon as the cock crowed. all hours of the night about Christmas time, | ridiculous animal than an atheist in his retireand to insinuate a kind of religious veneration for that season. It faded on the crowing of the cock. Some say, that ever 'gainst that season comes This admirable author, as well as the best and greatest men of all ages, and of all nations, seems to have had his mind thoroughly seasoned with religion, as is evident by many passages in his plays, that would not be suffered by a modern audience; and are, therefore, certain instances that the age he lived in had a much greater sense of virtue than the present. ment. His mind is incapable of rapture or elevation. He can only consider himself as an insignificant figure in a landscape, and wandering up and down in a field or a meadow, under the same terms as the meanest animal about him, and as subject to as total a mortality as they; with this aggravation, that he is the only one amongst them, who lies under the apprehension of it. In distresses, he must be of all creatures the most helplesss and forlorn; he feels the whole pressure of a present calamity, without being past, or the prospect of any thing that is to relieved by the memory of any thing that is come. Annihilation is the greatest blessing that he proposes to himself, and a halter or å pistol the only refuge he can fly to. But if you would behold one of these gloomy miscreants in his poorest figure, you must consider him under the terrors, or at the approach, of death. with one of these vermin, when there arose a About thirty years ago I was a shipboard brisk gale, which could frighten nobody but himself. Upon the rolling of the ship, he fell upon his knees, and confessed to the chaplain, that he had been a vile atheist, and had dehis estate. The good man was astonished, and a report immediately ran through the ship, that there was an atheist upon the upper deck.' Several of the common seamen, who had never heard the word before, thought it had been some strange fish; but they were more surprised when they saw it was a man, and heard out of his own mouth, that he never believed until that day that there was a God. As he lay in the agonies of confession, one of the honest tars whispered to the boatswain, that it would be a good deed to heave him overboard.' But we the wind fell, and the penitent relapsed, begging were now within sight of port, when of a sudden all of us that were present, as we were gentlemen, not to say any thing of what had passed.” It is, indeed, a melancholy reflection to consider, that the British nation, which is now at a greater height of glory for its councils and conquests than it ever was before, should distinguish itself by a certain looseness of principles, and a falling-off from those schemes of thinking, which conduce to the happiness and perfection of human nature. This evil comes upon us from the works of a few solemn block-nied a Supreme Being ever since he came to heads, that meet together, with the zeal and seriousness of apostles, to extirpate common sense, and propagate infidelity. These are the wretches, who, without any show of wit, learning, or reason, publish their crude conceptions with an ambition of appearing more wise than the rest of mankind, upon no other pretence than that of dissenting from them. One gets by heart a catalogue of title-pages and editions; and, immediately to become conspicuous, de clares that he is an unbeliever. Another knows how to write a receipt, or cut up a dog, and forthwith argues against the immortality of the soul. I have known many a little wit, in the ostentation of his parts, rally the truth of the scripture, who was not able to read a chapter in it. These poor wretches talk blasphemy for want of discourse, and are rather the objects of scorn or pity, than of our indignation; but the grave disputant, that reads and writes, and spends all his time in convincing himself and the world that he is no better than a brute, ought to be whipped out of government, as a blot to civil society, and a defamer of mankind. I love to consider an infidel, whether distinguished by the title of deist, atheist, or free-thinker, in three different lights, in his solitudes, his afflictions, and his last moments. A wise man that lives up to the principles of reason and virtue, if one considers him in his solitude, as in taking in the system of the universe, observing the mutual dependence and harmony, by which the whole frame of it hangs together, beating down his passions, or swelling his thoughts with magnificent ideas of Providence, makes a nobler figure in the eye of an intelligent being, than the greatest conqueror amidst all the pomps and solemnities of a triumph. On the contrary, there is not a more * Perhaps the author here alludes to Toland; for we are told, by a contemporary writer, that He was once the butt of the Tatler." He had not been ashore above two days, when one of the company began to rally him upon his devotion on shipboard, which the other denied in so high terms, that it produced the lie on both sides and ended in a duel. The atheist was run through the body, and after some loss of blood, became as good a Christian as he was at sea, until he found that his wound was not mortal. He is at present one of the free-thinkers of the age, and now writing a pamphlet against several received opinions concerning the existence of fairies. As I have taken upon me to censure the faults of the age and country in which I live, have passed over this crying one, which is the I should have thought myself inexcusable to subject of my present discourse. I shall therefore, from time to time, give my countrymen particular cautions against this distemper of the mind, that is almost become fashionable, and by that means more likely to spread. I have somewhere either read or heard a very memorable sentence, that a man would be a most insupportable monster, should he have the faults that are incident to his years, constitution, profession, family, religion, age, and country; and yet every man is in danger of them all. | Accedat suavitas quædam oportet sermonum, atque morum, handquaquam mediocre condimentuun amicitia: tristitia autem, et in omai re severitas absit. Habt illa quidem gravitatem, sed amicitia remissior esse debet, et liberior, et duleior, et ad omnem comitatem facilitatemque proclivior. Cic. De Amicitia. There should be added a certain sweetness of discourse and manners, which is no inconsiderable sauce to friendship. But by all means throw out sadness and severity in every thing. There is something of gravity indeed in it; but friendship requires a greater remissness, freedom, and pleasantness, and an inclination to good temper and affability. Sheer-lane, December 26. As I was looking over my letters this morning, I chanced to cast my eye upon the follow. ing one, which came to my hands about two months ago from an old friend of mine, who, as I have since learned, writ the agreeable epistle inserted in my paper of the third of the last month. It is of the same turn with the other, and may be looked upon as a specimen of right country letters. traps, and used every bird as a prisoner at discretion. Never did tyrant exercise more various cruelties. Some of the poor creatures he chased to death about the room; others he drove into the jaws of a blood-thirsty cat; and even in his greatest acts of mercy, either clipped the wings, or singed the tails, of his innocent captives. You will laugh, when I tell you I sympathized with every bird in its misfortunes; but I believe you will think me in the right for bewailing the child's unlucky humour. On the other hand, I am extremely pleased to see his younger brother carry a universal benevolence towards every thing that has life. When he was between four and five years old, I caught him weeping over a beautiful butterfly, which he chanced to kill as he was playing with it; and I am informed, that this morning he has given his brother three-halfpence, which was his whole estate, to spare the life of a tom-tit. These are at present the matters of greatest moment within my observation, and I know are too trifling to be communicated to any but so wise a man as yourself, and from one who has the happiness to be your most faithful, and most obedient servant.' The best critic that ever wrote, speaking of some passages in Homer which appear extravagant or frivolous, says, indeed, that they are dreams, but the dreams of Jupiter. My friend's letter appears to me in the same light. One sees him in an idle hour; but at the same time in the idle hour of a wise man. A great mind has something in it too severe and forbidding, that is not capable of giving itself such little relaxations, and of condescending to these agreeable ways of trifling. Tully, when he celebrates the friendship of Scipio and Lælius, who were the greatest as well as the politest men of their age, represents it as a beautiful passage in their retirement, that they used to themselves with the variety of shape and colour gather up shells on the sea-shore, and amuse which they met with in those little unregarded 'SIR,-This sets out to you from my summer- works of nature. The great Agesilaus could house upon the terrace, where I am enjoying a be a companion to his own children, and was few hours sunshine, the scanty sweet remains surprised by the ambassadors of Sparta, as he of a fine autumn. The year is almost at the was riding among them upon a hobby-horse. lowest; so that, in all appearance, the rest of Augustus, indeed, had no play-fellows of his my letters between this and spring will be dated own begetting; but is said to have passed many from my parlour fire, where the little fond prat- of his hours with little Moorish boys at a game tle of a wife and children will so often break in of marbles, not unlike our modern taw. There upon the connexion of my thoughts, that you is, methinks, a pleasure in seeing great men will easily discover it in my style. If this winter thus fall into the rank of mankind, and entertain should prove as severe as the last, I can tell you themselves with diversions and amusements beforehand, that I am likely to be a very misera- that are agreeable to the very weakest of their ble man, through the perverse temper of my species. I must frankly confess, that it is to eldest boy. When the frost was in its extremity, me a beauty in Cato's character, that he would you must know that most of the blackbirds, drink a cheerful bottle with his friend; and I robins, and finches of the parish, whose music cannot but own, that I have seen with great had entertained me in the summer, took refuge delight, one of the most celebrated authors of under my roof. Upon this, my care was, to the last age feeding the ducks in St. James's rise every morning before day, to set open my Park. By instances of this nature, the heroes, windows for the reception of the cold and the the statesmen, the philosophers, become as it hungry, whom, at the same time, I relieved were, familiar with us, and grow the more amiawith a very plentiful alms, by strewing corn ble, the less they endeavour to appear awful. and seeds upon the floor and shelves. But A man who always acts in the severity of wisDicky, without any regard to the laws of hos- dom, or the haughtiness of quality, seems to move pitality, considered the casements as so many in a personated part. It looks too constrained |