of wine set to every plate; and, if more was, wanted after dinner, it was brought. We had likewise a desert of excellent fruit at breakfast, dinner, and supper, Of course, we laid in an excellent stock of every thing we wanted for the remainder of our passage.

CHAPTER XXIII.

Arrival at Madras; with General Smith at the close of the war with Hyder Ally; Colonel Campbel's gallant offer to attack Hyder at the Mount; bashfulness of the governor, &c.; satirical sketch of the same.

We arrived at Madras just in time to assist at the close of the war with Hyder Ally. It would be highly presumptuous in me, therefore, to give any detail of that war, or the pusillanimous peace that Hyder frightened the gover nor and council into, when, by forced marches, he arrived at St. Thomas's Mount, about nine miles from Madras, flying from our victorious army, commanded by General Joseph Smith, from whom he could not have escaped, had they not been panic-struck on Hyder's sending

a message, threatening, that, unless they immediately sent off Hircars with positive orders for General Smith to halt his army, wherever they might meet him, he would storm their fort and put them all to the sword.

A more absurd threat, I believe, was never made; but it produced a strong effect. In vain did the brave old Colonel Campbel, then waiting to take his passage home, tell them they had nothing to apprehend; that, with so strong a fort, if they had but a few old invalids, assisted by the inhabitants, they might set Hyder at defiance with his army, harassed, dispirited, and without artillery. Moreover, he volunteered his service to attack Hyder's army that night, if they would allow him to take the force which then was in the Black Town, with the Europeans who could be spared from the garrison: pointing out to them what his experience and knowledge of the enemy warranted, that, after so forced a march for several days, they must be worn out with fatigue; and, conceiving themselves in perfect safety from any attack, would be found so remiss in vigilance, that, at the head of the troops he could muster, he had no doubt of completely surprising Hyder at midnight and discomfiting the whole of his army. Or, admitting that he should be defeated, they still had nothing more serious to apprehend, as General Smith was advancing rapidly after him.

But it was all in vain; if they had no personal fears, they were afraid of their garden-houses being destroyed, and Hyder obtained more than he could possibly have reason to expect.

When this was known in the army, considerable murmurs arose: their fatigues had been great, and the fall of Hyder was considered nearly as certain; and with him, at that time, the Mysore country would have immediately surrendered.

One young officer sketched a drawing on the occasion; it was handed about in the army at the time, and then destroyed to prevent his getting into trouble. As nearly as I can recollect, it was thus. The governor and council are seen without the walls of the fort, from a summons of Hyder to meet him. The senior in council is leading the governor along by a string through his nose and those of his brethren, the council: the leader himself, having a remarkably large carbuncle nose, is drawn accordingly. Hyder's first salutation is seizing hold of this precious jewel, and with his drawn scymetar he threatens to cut it off, unless Hircars are instantly despatched to stop General Smith and his army. These figures were in the fore ground, and, in the back, General Smith, with his arms folded, and his men, with grounded arms, are seen looking down with contempt on Hyder and his new friends. At the time and place, the satire was

well understood, and there may be some who yet remember it.

CHAPTER XXIV.

General Smith, his affability, &c.; Major Fitzgerald, manual wit.

THE army was soon separated and ordered into various districts: my destiny was in the Northern Circars. Having permission, I stopped a few weeks at Madras; and, from frequent invitations to the general's house at Vippery, an estimate of his worth and his character as a private gentleman made it impossible not to love him as a man and venerate him as a commander. One instance of his affability to strangers and young officers, that they might feel equally easy at his table, may be sufficient to shew the man.

The second time I went to Vippery, a Major Fitzgerald, one of the general's staff, sat at his right hand at dinner. This gentleman was lively, cheerful, and very fond of manual wit, for which he was well calculated in point of strength, being above six feet high, square, and well propor

tioned in his limbs. One species of this wit, which he usually exercised during dinner, was to have round pellets made up of new bread, by his Dubash servant, at the back of his chair; which he fillipped across the table, with considerable force, to those who were within his line of fire; most of whom returned his compliment in the

same way.

Some of his pellets occasionally struck me; and, as I took no notice of them, he observed, with a jesting oath, that I treated his efforts with contempt, but he would try to sting me to resentment. The general, conceiving that I might, as a stranger, feel in an aukward situa. tion, called me familiarly by my surname, and asked why I so patiently submitted. I answered, that one very strong reason for my not doing as others did, in this instance, was, that I did not like to waste an article I had known so much the want of." Well, well," the general replied, "that is one good rap for the major; but remember, when in Rome we must do as they do in Rome, bad as the custom is. If he, therefore, attacks you again and you do not like to waste bread, throw any thing else at him that is on the table." I assured him he should find me ready enough to obey his orders; and the major, receiving a fresh handful of pellets from his Dubash, began again, pointing most of his artillery at me.