You're Too Kind: A Brief History of FlatterySimon and Schuster, 05/02/2002 - 315 páginas Okay, who was the first flatterer? If you guessed Satan, you'd be close, but according to You're Too Kind, flattery began with chimpanzees, who groom each other all day long. In fact, flattery is an adaptive behavior that has helped us survive since prehistoric times. Our flattery is strategic praise, and to illustrate its myriad forms, Richard Stengel takes us on a witty, idiosyncratic tour, from chimps to the God of the Old Testament to the troubadour poets of the Middle Ages, all the way through Dale Carnegie and Monica Lewinsky's adoring love letters to her "Big Creep." Flattery thrives in hierarchical settings like royal courts or Fortune 500 boardrooms, and it flows both upward and downward. Downward is usually easier, but studies show it works best on those who already have high opinions of themselves. Stengel sees public flattery as an epidemic in our society, and private praise as being all too scarce. Most often, though, flattery these days is just a harmless deception, a victimless crime that often ends up making both the giver and the receiver feel a little better. In short, flattery works. |
Índice
Introduction | 11 |
A Word or Two on the Etymology of Flattery | 26 |
Everyone Has a Hierarchy | 31 |
You Can Take It with You | 49 |
Flatter Me or Else | 66 |
Flattery Is Undemocratic | 89 |
The Invention of Romantic Flattery | 109 |
The Courtiers Guide to How to Flatter | 131 |
How Flattery Won Friends and Influenced People | 193 |
The Science of Ingratiation | 218 |
The Capitals of Modern Flattery | 241 |
How to Flatter Without Getting Caught | 271 |
Appendix | 275 |
Notes | 281 |
Acknowledgments | 297 |
Index | 299 |
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Palavras e frases frequentes
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