weep. But what I paffed through I cannot exprefs, fo unspeakable was my anguifh. But the tender mercy of God fupported me therein, that my fpirit might not fail before him. 67. In the beginning of September 1766, I was living at Shafifbury, when Mr. Wesley paffing through in his way to Cornwall, I afked, if it would be agreeable for me to be at his houfe in London a few days? He faid, "Yes, as long as you please;" but before I fet out, I received the following letter. St. Ives, Cornwall, Sept. 16, 1766. My dear Brother, "I think you have no need to go to London. God has, it feems, provided a place for you here. Mr. Hofkins wants a worne-out Preacher to live with him, to take care of his family, and to pray with them morning and evening." I went down. As foon as Mr. Hofkins faw me, he said, "You are welcome to stay here as long as you live." But no fooner did I fix there, than I was, if poffible, ten times worse than before. In vain I ftrove to make myself easy: the more I ftrove, the more miferable I was: not that I wanted any thing which this world can afford. But can this world fatisfy a foul, that was made for God? The diftrefs of my mind foon became intolerable: it was a burden too heavy for me to bear. It feemed to me, that unless I got fome relief, I must die in defpair. One day I retired into the hall, fell on my face, and cried for mercy; but got no anfwer. I got up, and walked up and down the room, wringing my hands, and crying like to break my heart; begging of God for Chrift's fake, if there was any mercy for me, to help me. And bleffed be his name, all on a fudden, I found fuch a change, through my foul and body as is past description. I was afraid I should alarm the whole houfe with the expreffions of my joy. I had a full witness from the Spirit of God, that I fhould not find that bondage any more. Nor have I ever found it to this day. Glory be to God for all his mercy. 68. But 68. But notwithstanding this wonderful change, I had not the faith which I had once. But I found a very great alteration in reading the Scriptures. The promises opened to me more and more: and I expected to find fome great thing wrought upon me all at once. But God's ways are not as our ways, nor his thoughts as our thoughts. He led me by a way I had not known. He greatly deepened his work in my foul, and drove out his enemies by little and little, till I could clearly fay, Thy will be done." The lion became a lamb, and I found the truth of that word by happy experience, Thou wilt keep his foul in perfect peace, whofe mind is ftayed on thee! 69. I now thought, I would stay with Mr. Hofhins; for he was very kind to me. But I foon began to be fo bound in fpirit, that I could hardly pray in the family: nay, I could not afk a bleffing on our food, without much hefitation and ftammering. And all the comforts of life, which were then in great plenty, became altogether comfortless. Mr. Story being then in the Round, I made my complaint to him. He told me, he would take my place for a month, if I would spend that time in the Circuit. This I gladly undertook: and although for the space of three weeks, my coat was not once dry upon my back, yet I was warmer within, and far more comfortable than in the warm parlour. 70. When Mr. Story was gone, I thought I would stay here a few days, and then travel. But the first night I was as reftlefs as ever fo in the morning I took my leave, and in Jan. 1767, went into the Eaft of Cornwall. I found it was good for me to be there: my faith increased daily. And, bleffed be God, I found love and peace, and joy in the Holy Ghoft, fpringing up in my foul. I truft God will continue them to my dying day, and then receive me to himself. 71. I had long been travelling in the wilderness, in a land of defarts and pits, a land of draught and of the fhadow of death. This had been my lot for twenty years, a juft judgment of the Almighty for my fin. Bleffed be his name, that he he did not wholly caft me off! But I faw clearly nothing would avail, but a fresh application of the Saviour's blood to my wounded foul. I had now a happy fenfe of this: which with the thoughts of his forbearing me twenty years before my converfion, his filling me with his love for three years, his dealings with me in my fallen condition, and my present deliverance, caufed my foul to overflow with wonder and praife for his long fuffering goodness. I faw nothing was too hard for God! I could caft myself on the Lord Jefus! All the promises in the Scriptures were full of comfort; particularly that; I have known thee in the furnace of affliction. The Scriptures were all precious to my foul, as the rain to the thirfty land. And when Satan affaulted me afresh, I did not stand to reason with him, but fled to the Lord Jefus for refuge. Hereby the fnare was foon broken, and I found an increase both of faith, hope, and love. I could now truly fay, The Lord is my fhepherd, therefore fhall I lack nothing. He maketh me to lie down in green pastures; he leadeth me befide the ftill waters. He reftoreth my foul; he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's fake. 72. It was not my intention ever to write any account of these things, had not fome of my friends greatly pressed me thereto. Nevertheless I put it off from time to time, being confcious I had no talent for writing, until my peace was well nigh loft: at laft I was prevailed upon to begin. I had not wrote many lines, before I found my foul in perfect peace. I found myself likewife greatly affifted, to recollect the manifold dealings of God with me: fo that I have the greatest reafon to believe, it is his will I fhould make known, even by thefe inftances of his goodness, that he is long-fuffering, nɔt willing that any fhould perish, but that all fhould come to repentance. May he blefs the feeble attempt to the good of many! May they learn wifdom by the things that I have fuffered! And be all the glory afcribed unto him that fitteth on the throne, and unto the Lamb for ever! VOL. III. 94 A Short ** A Short Account of the LIFE of Mr. THOMAS MITCHELL. 1. I Was born in the parish of Bingley, Yorkshire, Dec. 3, 1726. My Parents both died in the faith. I lived with them seven years, and seven years more with an Uncle, who was in the fame parish. From five years old I had ftrong convictions at times, and put up many prayers for mercy. And though I had no one to teach me, yet I had the fear of God in my heart. If I was overtaken in any fin, I was much troubled, till I had faid my prayers, which I thought would make all up. 2. At fourteen, I was put 'prentice to be a Mafon. While I lived with my Mafter, I had little concern for my foul. But after fix years, at the time of the Rebellion, I enlisted among the Yorkshire Blues. I continued with them about a year. There was one man among us, who had the fear of God before his eyes. He gave me good advice, which one time, in particular, took great effect upon me and my comrade. We both of us were under deep convictions, but knew not what to do to be faved. I began to fear death exceedingly, knowing I was not fit to die. These words followed me continually; Curfed is every one that continueth not in all things, written in the book of the law to do them. I thought I muft fulfil the law, or be damned. I ftrove all I could to fulfil it; but I thought I grew worfe and woife, till my load was many times heavier than I could bear. 3. In the year 1746, the Rebellion being over, we were difcharged. I then fought for a people that feared God, and foon joined the Society. I heard John Nelfon feveral times, and began to have fome hope of finding mercy: fome time after I went to hear Mr. Grimshaw, and was convinced that we are to be faved by faith: yea, that the very worst of finners |