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And besides, sir, as you civilly throw my marriage with your sister in my teeth, I must teach you the wide difference between us; my fortune enabled me to please myself; and it would have been as overgrown a folly in me to have omitted it, as in you to do it.”—“My fortune enables me to please myself likewise,’ said Joseph ; “for all my leasure is centred in Fanny ; and whilst I ve health, I shall be able to support her with my labour in that station to which she was born, and with which she is content.’ ‘Brother,’ said Pamela, ‘Mr. Booby advises you as a friend ; and no doubt my papa and mamma will be of his opinion, and will have great reason to be angry with you for destroying what his goodness hath done, and throwing down our family again, after he hath raised it. It would become you better, brother, to pray for the assistance of É. against such a passion, than to inulge it.”—“Sure, sister, you are not in earnest ; I am sure she is your equal at least.”—“She was my equal,” answered Pamela ; “but I am no longer Pamela Andrews, I am now this gentleman's lady, and as such, am above her.—I hope I shall never behave with an unbecoming pride : but, at the same time, I shall always endeavour to know myself, and question not the assistance of grace to that purpose.” They were now summoned to breakfast, and thus ended their discourse for the present, very little to the satisfaction of any of the parties. Fanny was now walking in an avenue at some distance from the house, where Joseph had promised to take the first opportunity of coming to her. She had not a shilling in the world, and had subsisted, ever since her return, entirely on the charity of Parson Adams. A young gentleman, attended by many servants, came up to her, and asked her, if that was not the Lady Booby's house before him : This, indeed, he well knew ; but had framed the question for no other reason than to make her look up, and discover if her face was equal to the delicacy of her shape. He no sooner saw it, than he was struck with amazement. He stopped his horse, and swore she was the most beautiful creature he ever beheld. Then instantly alighting, and delivering his horse to his servant, he rapt out half a dozen oaths that he would kiss her; to which she at first submitted, begging he would not be rude ; but he was not satisfied with the civility of a salute, nor even with the rudest attack he could make on her lips, but caught her in his arms, and endeavoured to kiss her breasts, which with all her strength she resisted, and, as our spark was not of the Herculean race, with some difficulty prevented. The young gentleman, being soon out of breath in the struggle, quitted her, and remounting his horse, called one of his
servants to him, whom he ordered to stay behind with her, and make her any offers whatever, to prevail on her to return home with him in the evening ; and to assure her, he would take her into keeping. He then rode on with his other servants, and arrived at the lady’s house, to whom he was a distant relation, and was come to pay a visit, The trusty fellow, who was employed in an office he had long been accustomed to, discharged his part with all the fidelity and dexterity imaginable; but to no purpose. She was entirely deaf to his offers, and reo them with the utmost disdain. At ast the pimp, who had perhaps more warm blood about him than his master, began to solicit for himself; he told her, though he was a servant, he was a man of some fortune, which he would make her mistress of-and this without any insult to her virtue, for that he would marry her. She answered, if his master himself, or the greatest lord in the land, would marry her, she would refuse him. At last, being weary with persuasions, and on fire with charms which would have almost kindled a flame in the bosom of an ancient philosopher, or modern divine, he fastened his horse to the ground, and attacked her with much more force than the gentleman had exerted. Poor Fanny would not have been able to resist his rudeness a short time, but the deity who presides over chaste love sent her Joseph to her assistance. He no sooner came within sight, and perceived her struggling with a man, than like a cannon ball, or like lightning, or any thing that is swifter, if any thing be, he ran towards her, and coming up just as the ravisher had torn her handkerchief from her breasts, before his lips had touched that seat of innocence and bliss, he dealt him so lusty a blow in that o: of his neck which a rope would have ecome with the utmost propriety, that the fellow staggered backwards, and perceiving he had to do with something rougher than the little, tender, trembling hand of Fanny, he quitted her, and turning about, saw his rival, with fire flashing from his eyes, again ready to assail him; and, indeed, before he could well defend himself, or return the first blow, he received a second, which, had it fallen on that part of the stomach to which it was directed, would have been probably the last he would have had any occasion for: but the ravisher, lifting up his hand, drove the blow upwards to his mouth, whence it dislodged three of his teeth; and now not conceiving any extraordinary affection for the beauty of Joseph's person, nor being extremely pleased with this method of salutation, he collected all his force, and aimed a blow at Joseph's breast, which he artfully parried with one fist, so that it lost its force entirely in air ; and stepping one foot backward, he darted his fist so fiercely at his enemy, that had he not caught it in his hand, (for he was a boxer of no inferior fame,) it must have tumbled him on the ground. And now the ravisher meditated another blow, which he aimed at that part of the breast where the heart is lodged ; Joseph did not catch it as before, yet so prevented its aim, that it fell directy on his nose, but with abated force. Joseph, then, moving both fist and foot forwards at the same time, threw his head so dexterously into the stomach of the ravisher, that he fell a lifeless lump on the field, where he lay many minutes breathless and motionless. When Fanny saw her Joseph receive a blow in his face, and blood running in a stream from him, she began to tear her hair, and invoke all human and divine power to his assistance. She was not, however, long under this affliction, before Joseph, having conquered his enemy, ran to her, and assured her he was not hurt; she then instantly fell on her knees, and thanked God that he made Joseph the means of her rescue, and at the same time preserved him from being injured in attempting it. She offered with her handkerchief to wipe his blood from his face; but he, seeing his rival attempting to recover his legs, turned, to him, and asked him, if he had enough? To which the other answered, he had ; for he believed he had fought with the devil, instead of a man; and loosening his horse, said he should not have attempted the wench, if he had known she had been so well provided for. Fanny now begged Joseph to return with her to Parson Adams, and to promise that he would leave her no more. These were propositions so agreeable to Joseph, that, had he heard them, he would have given an immediate assent; but indeed his eyes were now his only sense; for you may remember, reader, that the ravisher had tore her handkerchief from Fanny's neck, by which he had discovered such a sight, that Joseph hath declared, all the statues he ever beheld were so much inferior to it in beauty, that it was more capable of converting a man into a statue, than of being imitated by the greatest master of that art. This modest creature, whom no warmth in summer could ever induce to expose her charms to the wanton sun, a modesty to which perhaps they owed their inconceivable whiteness, had stood many minutes bare-necked in the presence of Joseph, before her apprehension of his danger, and the horror of seeing his blood, would suffer her once to reflect on what concerned herself; till at last, when the cause of her concern had vanished, an admiration at his silence, together with observing the fixed
position of his eyes, produced an idea in the lovely maid, which brought more blood into her face than had flowed from Joseph's nostrils. The snowy hue of her bosom was likewise changed to vermillion, at the instant when she clapped her handkerchief around her neck. Joseph saw the uneasiness she suffered, and immediately removed his eyes from an object, in surveying which he had felt the greatest delight which the organs of sight were capable of conveying to his soul;-so great was his fear of io. her, and so truly did his passion for her deserve the noble name of love.
Fanny, being now recovered from her confusion, which was almost equalled by what Joseph had felt from observing it, again mentioned her request; this was instantly and gladly complied with: and together they crossed two or three fields, which brought them to the habitation of Mr. Adams.
CHAPTER VIII. .1 discourse which happened between Mr. .1dams, JMrs. ..]dams, Joseph, and Fanny; with some behaviour of Mr. .1dams, which will be called by some few readers very low, absurd, and unnatural. The parson and his wife had just ended a long dispute when the lovers came to the door. Indeed this young couple had been the subject of the dispute; for Mrs. Adams was one of those prudent people who never do any thing to injure their families, or perhaps one of those good mothers who would even stretch their conscience to serve their children. She had long entertained hopes of seeing her eldest daughter succeed Mrs. Slipslop, and of making her second son an exciseman by Lady Booby's interest. These were expectations she could not endure the thoughts of quitting, and was therefore very uneasy to see her husband so resolute to oppose the lady's intention in Fanny's affair. She told him, ‘It behooved every man to take the first care of his family; that he had a wife and six children, the maintaining and providing for whom would be business enough for him without intermeddling in other folks’ affairs; that he had always preached up submission to superiors, and would do ill to give an example of the contrary behaviour in his own conduct; that if Lady Booby did wrong, she must answer for it herself, and the sin would not lie at their door; that Fanny had been a servant, and bred up in the lady's own family, and consequently she must have known more of her than they did, and it was very improbable, if she had behaved herself well, that the lady would have been so bitterly her enemy; that perhaps he was too much inclined to think well of her, because she was handsome, but handsome women were often no better than they should be; that G– made ugly women as well as handsome ones, and that if a woman had virtue, it signified nothing whether she had beauty or no.' For all which reasons she concluded he should oblige the lady, and stop the future publication of the banns. But all these excellent arguments had no effect on the parson, who persisted in doing his duty without regarding the consequence it might have on his worldly interest. He endeavoured to answer her as well as he could ; to which she had just finished her reply, (for she had always the last word every where but at church,) when Joseph and Fanny entered their kitchen, where the parson and his wife then sat at breakfast over some bacon and cabbage. There was a coldness in the civility of Mrs. Adams, which persons of accurate speculation might have observed, but escaped her present tests; indeed, it was a good deal covered y the heartiness of Adams, who no sooner heard that Fanny had neither eat nor drank that morning, than he presented her a bone of bacon he had just been gnawing, being the only remains of his provision, and then ran nimbly to the tap, and produced a mug of small beer, which he called ale; however it was the best in his house. Joseph, addressing himself to the parson, told him the discourse which had passed between Squire Booby, his sister, and himself, concerning Fanny: he then acquainted him with the dangers whence he had rescued her, and communicated some apprehensions on her account. He concluded, that he should never have an easy moment till Fanny was absolutely his, and begged that he might be suffered to fetch a licence, saying he could easily borrow the money. The parson answered, That he had already given his sentiments concerning a licence, and that a very few days would make it unnecessary. ‘Joseph,” says he, ‘I wish this haste doth not arise rather from your impatience than your sear; but as it certainly springs from one of these causes I will examine both. Of each of these therefore in their turn ; and first, for the first of these, namely, impatience. Now child, I must inform you, that is, in your purposed marriage with this young woman, you have no intention but the indulgence of carnal appetites, you are guilty of a very heinous sin. Marriage was ordained for nobler purposes, as you will learn when you hear the service provided on that occasion read to you. Nay, perhaps, if you are a good lad, I, child, shall give you a sermon gratis, wherein I shall demonstrate how little regard ought to be had to the flesh on such occasions. The text will be, Matthew the 5th, and part of the 28th verse, Whosoever looketh on a woman, so as to lust
lities, and value you for them;
ter her. The latter part I shall omit, as oreign to my purpose. Indeed, all such brutal lusts and affections are to be greatly subdued, if not totally eradicated, before the vessel can be said to be consecrated to honour. To marry with a view of gratifying those inclinations, is a prostitution of that holy ceremony, and must entail a curse on all who so lightly undertake it. If therefore, this haste arises from impatience, you are to correct, and not give way to it. Now, as to the second head which I proposed to speak to, namely, fear: it argues a diffidence highly criminal of that Power in which alone we should put our trust, seeing we may be well assured that he is able, not only to defeat the designs of our enemies, but even to turn their hearts. Instead of taking, therefore, any unjustifiable or desperate means to rid ourselves of fear, we should resort to prayer only, on these occasions; and we may be then certain of obtaining what is best for us. When any accident threatens us, we are not to despair, nor, when it overtakes us, to grieve; we must submit in all things to the will of Providence, and set our affections so much on nothing here, that we cannot quit it without reluctance. ‘You are a young man, and can know but little of this world; I am older, and have seen a great deal. All passions are criminal in their excess; and even love itself, if it is not subservient to our duty, may render us blind to it. Had Abraham so loved his son Isaac, as to refuse the sacrifice required, is there any of us who would not condemn him Joseph, I know your many good quaut as I am to render an account of your soul, which is committed to my cure, I cannot see any fault without reminding you of it. You are too much inclined to passion, child, and have set your affections so absolutely on this young woman, that if G– required her at your hands, I fear you would reluctantly part with her. Now, believe me, no Christian ought so to set his heart on any person or thing in this world, but that whenever it shall be required, or taken from him in any manner by divine providence, he may be able peaceably, quietly, and contentedly to resign it.’ At which words one came hastily in and acquainted Mr. Adams, that his youngest son was drowned. He stood silent a moment, and soon began to stam about the room and deplore his loss wit the bitterest agony. Joseph, who was overwhelmed with concern likewise, recovered himself sufficiently to endeavour to comfort the parson; in which attempt he used many arguments, that he had at several times remembered, out of his own discourses, both in private and public, (for he was a great enemy to the passions, and preached nothing more than the conquest of them by reason and grace,) but he was not at leisure now to hearken to his advice. “Child, child,’ said he, “do not go about impossibilities. Had it been any other of my children, I could have borne it with patience; but my little prattler, the darling and comfort of my old age,_the little wretch, to be snatched out of life just at his entrance into it; the best-tempered boy, who never did a thi to offend me. It was but this morning we him his first lesson in Quae Genus. his was the very book he learnt; poor child! it is of no further use to thee now. He would have made the best scholar, and have been an ornament to the church ;such parts and such goodness, never met in one so young.”—“And the handsomest lad, too,” says Mrs. Adams, recovering from a swoon in Fanny's arms. ‘My poor Jacky, shall I never see thee more?' cries the parson.— Yes, surely, says Joseph, “and in a better place, you will meet again, never to part more.’ I believe the parson did not hear these words, for he paid little regard to them, but went on lamenting, whilst the tears trickled down into his bosom. At last he cried out, ‘Where is my little darling?” and was sallying out, when, to his great surprise and joy, in which I hope the reader will sympathise, he met his son in a wet condition indeed, but alive, and running towards him. The person who brought the news of his misfortune, had been a little too eager, as people sometimes are, from, I believe, no very good principle, to relate ill news; and seeing him fall into the river, instead of running to his assistance, directly ran to acquaint his father of a sate which he had concluded to be inevitable, but whence the child was relieved by the same poor pedlar who had relieved his father before from a less distress. The parson's joy was now as extravagant as his grief had been before; he kissed and embraced his son a thousand times, and danced about the room like one frantic; but as soon as he discovered the face of his old friend the pedlar, and heard the fresh obligation he had to him, what were his sensations? not those which two courtiers feel in one another's embraces; not those with which a great man receives the vile treacherous engines of his wicked Fo not those with which a worthess younger brother wishes his elder joy of a son, or a man congratulates his rival on his obtaining a mistress, a place, or an honour.—No, reader, he felt the ebullition, the overflowings of a full, honest, open heart, towards the person who had conferred a real obligation, and of which, if thou canst not conceive an idea within, I will not vainly endeavour to assist thee. When these tumults were over, the par
son, taking Joseph aside, proceeded thus— ‘No, Joseph, do not give too much way to thy passions, if thou i. expect happiness.” —The patience of Joseph, nor perhaps of Job, could bear no longer; he interrupted the parson, saying, “It was easier to give advice than take it ; nor did he perceivs he could so entirely conquer himself, when he apprehended he had lost his son, or when he found him recovered.”—“Boy,” replied Adams, raising his voice, ‘it doth not become green heads to advise grey hairs.Thou art ignorant of the tenderness of fatherly affection : when thou art a father, thou wilt be capable then only of knowin
what a father can feel. No man is oblige
to impossibilities; and the loss of a child is one of those great trials, where our grief may be allowed to become immoderate."— ‘Well, sir, cries Joseph, and if I love a mistress as well as you your child, surely her loss would grieve me equally.”—“Yes, but such love is foolishness, and wrong in itself, and ought to be conquered,' answered Adams; “it savours too much of the flesh.’ — Sure, sir,’ says Joseph, “it is not sinful to love my wife, no, not even to dote on her to distraction '-' Indeed, but it is,’ says Adams. ‘Every man ought to love his wife, no doubt; we are commanded so to do; but we ought to love her with moderation and discretion.”—“I am afraid I shall be guilty of some sin, in spite of all my endeavours,’ says Joseph ; for I shall love without any moderation, I am sure.”—“You talk foolishly and childishly, cries Adams.’ — Indeed,” says Mrs. Adams, who had listened to the latter part of their conversation, “you talk more foolish yourself. I hope, my dear, you will never preach any such doctrines, as that husbands can love their wives too well. If I knew you had such a sermon in the house, I am sure I would burn it; and I declare, if I had not been convinced you had loved me as well as you could, I can answer for myself, I should have hated and despised you. Marry come up! Fine doctrine, indeed! A wife hath a right to insist on her husband's loving her as much as ever he can ; and he is a sinful villain who doth not. Doth he not promise to love her, and comfort her, and to cherish her, and all that? I am sure I remember it all, as well as if I had repeated it over but yesterday, and shall never forget it. Besides, I am certain you do not preach as you practice; for you have been a loving and a cherishing husband to me, that's the truth on’t, and why you should endeavour to put such wicked nonsense into this young man's head I cannot devise. Don’t hearken to him, Mr. Joseph; be as good a husband as you are able, and love your wife with all your body and soul too.” Here a violent rap at the door put an end to their discourse, and produced a scene which the reader will find in the next chapter.
.1 visit which the polite Lady Booby and her polite F
friend paid to the Parson.
The Lady Booby had no sooner had an account from the gentleman, of his meeting a wonderful beauty near her house, and perceived the raptures with which he spoke of her, than immediately concluding it must be Fanny, she began to meditate a design of bringing them better acquainted; and to entertain hopes that the fine clothes, presents, and promises of this youth, would prevail on her to abandon Joseph : she therefore proposed to her company a walk in the fields before dinner, when she led them towards Mr. Adams's house; and, as she approached it, told them, if they pleased she would divert them with one of the most ridiculous sights they had ever seen, which was an old foolish parson, who, she said laughing, kept a wife and six brats on a salary of about twenty pounds a year; adding, that there was not such another ragged family in the parish.
They all readily agreed to this visit, and arrived whilst Mrs. Adams was declaiming, as in the last chapter. Beau Didapper, which was the name of the young gentleman we have seen riding towards Lady Booby's, with his cane mimicked the rap of a London footman at the door. The people within, namely, Adams, his wife, and three children, Joseph, Fanny, and the pedlar, were all thrown into confusion by this knock; but Adams went directly to the door, which being opened, the Lady Booby and her company walked in, and were received by the parson with about two hundred bows, and by his wife with as many curtesies; the latter telling the lady, She was ashamed to be seen in such a pickle, and that her house was in such a litter; but that if she had expected such an honour from her ladyship, she should have sound her in a better manner.” The parson made no apologies, though he was in his half cassock, and a flannel night-cap. He said, ‘They were heartily welcome to his poor cottage,’ and, turning to Mr. Didapper, cried out, “...Non mea renidet in domo lacunar.’ The beau answered, “He did not understand Welch;’ at which the parson stayed and made no reply.
Mr. Didapper, or Béau Didapper, was a young gentleman of about four foot five inches in height. He wore his own hair, though the scarcity of it might have given him sufficient excuse for a periwig. His face was thin and pale; the shape of his body
and legs none of the best, for he had very narrow shoulders, and no calf; and his gait might more properly be called hopping than walking. The qualifications of his mind were well adapted to his person. We shall handle the first negatively. He was not entirely ignorant; for he could talk a little rench, and sing two or three Italian songs: he had lived too much in the world to bashful, and too much at court to be proud: he seemed not much inclined to avarice; for he was profuse in his expenses: nor had he all the features of prodigality; for he never gave a shilling: no hater of women, for he always dangled after them; yet so little subject to lust, that he had, among those who knew him best, the character of great moderation in his pleasures. No drinker of wine; nor so addicted to passion, but that a hot word or two from an adversary made him immediately cool.
Now, to give him only a dash or two on the affirmative side: though he was born to an immense fortune, he chose, for the pitiful and dirty consideration of a place of little consequence, to depend entirely on the will of a fellow, whom they call a great man; who treated him with the utmost disrespect, and exacted of him a plenary obedience to his commands; which he implicitly submitted to, at the expense of his conscience, his honour, and of his country, in which he had himself so very large a shareAnd to finish his character; as he was entirely well satisfied with his own person and parts, so he was very apt to ridicule and laugh at any imperfection in another. Such was the little person, or rather thing, that hopped after Lady Booby into Mr. Adams's kitchen.
The parson and his company retreated from the chimney-side, where they had been seated, to give room to the lady and hers. Instead of returning any of the curtesies or extraordinary civility of Mrs. Adams, the lady, turning to Mr. Booby, cried out, “Quelle bête 1 Quel animal " And presently after discovering Fanny, (for she did not need the circumstance of her standing by Joseph to assure the identity of her person,) she asked the beau, ‘Whether he did not think her a pretty girl?”—“Begad, madam,” answered he, “’tis the very same I met.”—“I did not imagine,' replied the lady, “you had so good a taste.”—“Because 1 never liked you, I warrant, cries the beau. ‘Ridiculous!” said she: , ‘you know you was always my aversion.” “I would never mention aversion,” answered the beau “with that face;" dear Lady Booby, wash your face before you mention aversion, I beseech
* Lest this should appear unnatural to some readers, we think proper to acquaint them, that it is taken verbatim from very polite conversation.