Imagens das páginas
PDF
ePub

by a battell. View him at a muster, and he goes with such noise, as if his body were the wheelebarrow that carried his judgement rumbling to drill his souldiers. No man can worse define betweene pride and noble courtesie: he that salutes him not so farre as a pistoll carries levell, gives him the disgust or affront, chuse you whether. Hee traines

by the booke, and reckons so many postures of the pike and musket, as if he were counting at noddy. When he comes at first upon a camisado, he lookes like the foure winds in painting, as if hee would blow away the enemy; but at the very first on-set, suffers feare and trembling to dresse themselves in his face apparantly. He scornes any man should take place before him yet at the entring of a breach, he hath been so humble-minded, as to let his lieutenant lead his troopes for him. He is so sure arm'd for taking hurt, that he seldome does any and while he is putting on his armes, he is thinking what summe he can make to satisfie his ransome. He will raile openly against all the great commanders of the adverse party; yet in his owne conscience allowes them for better men: such is the nature of his feare, that contrary to all other filthy qualities it makes him thinke better of another man then himselfe. The first part of him that is set a running, is his eye-sight when that is once struck with terrour, all the costive physicke in the world cannot stay him;

[ocr errors][ocr errors]
[ocr errors]

if ever he do any thing beyond his owne heart, 'tis for a knighthood, and he is the first kneeles for't without bidding.

A Pyrate

RULY defined, is a bold traytor; for he fortifies a castle against the king.

Give him sea-roome in never so small a

vessell, and like a witch in a sieve, you would thinke he were going to make merry with the devill. Of all callings his is the most desperate, for he will not leave off his theeving, though he be in a narrow prison, and looke every day (by tempest or fight) for execution. He is one plague the devill hath added, to make the sea more terrible then a storme; and his heart is so hardned in that rugged element, that hee cannot repent, though he view his grave (before him) continually open: he hath so little of his owne, that the house he sleeps in is stoln; all the necessities of life he filches, but one: he cannot steale a sound sleep, for his troubled conscience. Hee is very gentle to those under him, yet his rule is the horriblest tyranny in the world, for he gives licence to all rape, murder, and cruelty, in his own example: what he gets, is small use to him, onely lives by it, (somewhat the longer) to do a little more service to his belly; for he throwes

away his treasure upon the shore in riot, as if he cast it into the sea. He is a cruell hawke that flies at all but his owne kind: and as a whale never comes a-shore but when shee is wounded; so he very seldome, but for his necessities. Hee is the merchants book, that serves only to reckon up his losses; a perpetuall plague to noble traffique, the hurican of the sea, and the earth-quake of the exchange. Yet for all this give him but his pardon, and forgive him restitution, he may live to know the inside. of a church, and die on this side Wapping.

[ocr errors]

An ordinarie Fencer

S a fellow, that beside shaving of cudgels, hath a good insight into the world, for hee hath long beene beaten to it. Flesh and bloud he is, like other men; but surely nature meant him stockfish: his, and a dancing-schoole, are inseparable adjuncts; and are bound, though both stinke of sweat most abominable, neither shall complaine of annoyance: three large bavins set up his trade, with a bench, which (in the vacation of the afternoone) he uses for his day-bed for a firkin to pisse in, he shall be allowed that, by those make Allom: when hee comes on the stage at his prize, he makes a legge seven severall wayes, and

:

[ocr errors][ocr errors]

scrambles for mony, as if he had beene borne at the
Bathe in Somerset-shire: at his challenge he shewes
his metall; for contrary to all rules of physick, he
dares bleed, though it be in the dog-dayes: he
teaches devilish play in's schoole, but when he fights
himselfe, hee doth it in the feare of a good chris-
tian. He compounds quarrels among his schollers,
and when he hath brought the businesse to a good
upshot, he makes the reckoning. His wounds are
seldome above skin-deepe; for an inward bruise,
lambstones and sweet-breads are his onely sperma
ceti, which he eats at night, next his heart fasting:
strange schoole-masters they are, that every day
set a man as far backward as he went forward:
and throwing him into a strange posture, teach him
to thresh satisfaction out of injury. One signe of
a good nature is, that hee is still open brested to
his friends for his foile, and his doublet, weare
not out above two buttons, and resolute hee is, for
he so much scorns to take blowes, that he never
wears cuffes; and he lives better contented with a
little, then other men; for if he have two eyes in's
head, he thinkes nature hath overdone him.
Lord Mayors triumph makes him a man, for that's
his best time to flourish. Lastly, these fencers are
such things, that care not if all the world were
ignorant of more letters then onely to read their
patent.

The

[merged small][ocr errors][merged small]

II

A Puny-Clarke.

EE is tane from grammar-schoole halfe
codled, and can hardly shake off his
dreames of breeching in a twelve month.
Hec is a farmers sonne, and his fathers utmost
ambition is to make him an atturney. He doth itch
towards a poet, and greases his breeches extremely
with feeding without a napkin. He studies false dice
to cheat costermongers, and is most chargeable to the
butler of some Inne of Chancery, for pissing in their
green-pots. Hee cats ginger-bread at a play-house;
and is so sawcy, that he ventures fairly for a broken
pate at the banquetting house, and hath it. Hee
would never come to have any wit, but for a long

vacation, for that makes him bethinke him how hee
shall shift another day. Hee prayes hotly against
fasting; and so hee may sup well on Friday nights,
he cares not though his master be a Puritane. He
practises to make the words in his declaration
spread, as a sewer doth the dishes at a niggards
table; a clarke of a swooping dash, is as commend-
able as a Flanders horse of a large taile. Though
you be never so much delay'd, you must not call
his master knave; that makes him goe beyond
himselfe, and write a challenge in court-hand; for
it may be his own another day. These are some

[ocr errors]
« AnteriorContinuar »