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Volumes on shelter'd stalls expanded lie, Summon at once thy courage, rouse thy care, And various science lures the learned eye ; (groan, Stand firm, look back, be resolute, beware. The bending shelves with ponderous scholiasts Forth issuing from steep lanes, the collier's steeds And deep divines, to modern shops unknown: Drag the black load ; another cart succeeds; Here, like the bee, that on industrious wing Team follows team, crowds heap'd on crowds appear, Collects the various odours of the Spring,
And wait impatient till the road grow clear. Walkers at leisure, learning's flowers may spoil, Now all the pavement sounds with trampling feet, Nor watch the wasting of the midnight oil; And the mix'd hurry barricades the street. May morals snatch from Plutarch's tatter'd page, Entangled here, the waggon's lengthen'd team A mildew'd Bacon, or Stagyra's sage:
Cracks the tough harness; here a ponderous beam Here sauntering 'prentices o'er Otway weep, Lies over-turn’d athwart; for slaughter fed, O'er Congreve smile, or over D'Urfey sleep; Here lowing bullocks raise their horned head. Pleas' semptresses the Lock's fam'd Rape unfold; | Now oaths grow loud, with coaches coaches jar, And Squirts * read Garth, till apozems grow cold. And the smart blow provokes the sturdy war; O Lintot ! let my labours obvious lie,
From the high box they whirl the thong around, Rang'd on thy stall, for every curious eye ! And with the twining lash their shins resound : So shall the poor these precepts gratis know, Their rage ferments, more dangerous wounds they And to my verse their future safeties owe.
try, What walker shall his mean ambition fix And the blood gushes down their painful eye. On the false lustre of a coach and six ?
And now on foot the frowning warriors light, Let the vain virgin, lur'd by glaring show, And with their ponderous fists renew the fight; Sigh for the liveries of th' embroider'd beau. Blow answers blow, their cheeks are smear'd with See yon bright chariot on its braces swing,
blood, With Flanders mares, and on an arched spring.
Till down they fall, and grappling roll in mud. That wretch, to gain an equipage and place, So, when two boars, in wild Ytene* bred, Betray'd his sister to a lewd embrace,
Or on Westphalia's fattening chesnuts fed, This coach, that with the blazon'd 'scutcheon glows, Gnash their sharp tusks, and, rous'd with equal fire, Vain of his unknown race, the coxcomb shows. Dispute the reign of some luxurious mire; Here the brib'd lawyer, sunk in velvet, sleeps;
In the black flood they wallow o'er and o'er, The starving orphan, as he passes, weeps;
Till their arm'd jaws distil with foam and gore. There flames a fool, begirt with tinsel slaves,
Where the mob gathers, swiftly shoot along, Who wastes the wealth of a whole race of knaves;
Nor idly mingle in the noisy throng: That other, with a clustering train behind, Lur'd by the silver hilt, amid the swarm, Owes his new honours to a sordid mind!
The subtle artist will thy side disarm. This next in court-fidelity excels,
Nor is the flaxen wig with safety worn; The public rifles, and his country sells.
High on the shoulder, in a basket borne, May the proud chariot never be my fate,
Lurks the sly boy, whose hand, to rapine bred, If purchas'd at so mean, so dear a rate !
Plucks off the curling honours of thy head. Or rather give me sweet content on foot,
Here dives the skulking thief, with practis'd sleight, Wrapt in my virtue, and a good surtout !
And unfelt fingers make thy pocket light.
And thy late snuff-box is no more thy own.
But, lo! his bolder thefts some tradesman spies,
Swift from his prey the scudding lurcher flies;
Dext'rous he 'scapes the coach with nimble bounds, O Trivia, goddess ! leave these low abodes, Whilst every honest tongue “stop thief !” resounds. And traverse o'er the wide ethereal roads ;
So speeds the wily fox, alarm'd by fear, Celestial queen! put on thy robes of light, Who lately filch'd the turkey's callow care; Now Cynthia nam'd, fair regent of the night. Hounds following hounds grow louder as he flies, At sight of thee, the villain sheathes his sword, And injur'd tenants join the hunter's cries. Nor scales the wall, to steal the wealthy hoard. Breathless, he stumbling falls. Ill-fated boy! O may thy silver lamp from Heaven's high bower | Why did not honest work thy youth employ? Direct my footsteps in the midnight hour! | Seiz'd by rough hands, he's dragg'd amid the rout,
When Night first bids the twinkling stars appear, And stretch'd beneath the pump's incessant spout : Or with her cloudy vest enwraps the air,
Or plung'd in miry ponds, he gasping lies, Then swarms the busy street; with caution tread, Mud chokes his mouth, and plaisters o'er his eyes. Where the shop-windows + falling threat thy head; I Let not the ballad singer's shrilling strain Now labourers home return and join their strength Amid the swarm thy listening ear detain : To bear the tottering plank, or ladder's length; Guard well thy pocket; for these Syrens stand Still fix thy eyes intent upon the throng,
To aid the labours of the diving hand; And, as the passes open, wind along.
| Confederate in the cheat, they draw the throng, Where the fair columns of St. Clement stand, And cambric handkerchiefs reward the song. Whose straiten'd bounds encroach upon the Strand; | But soon as coach or cart drives rattling on, Where the low penthouse bows the walker's head, The rabble part, in shoals they backward run. And the rough pavement wounds the yielding tread; So Jove's loud bolts the mingled war divide, Where not a post protects the narrow space, And Greece and Troy retreat on either side. And, strung in twines, combs dangle in thy face; If the rude throng pour on with furious pace,
And hap to break thee from a friend's embrace, • An apothecary's boy, in The Dispensary. + A species of window now almost forgotten. N. * New Forest in Hampshire, anciently so called. Stop short; nor struggle through the crowd in vain, | Yet who the footman's arrogance can quell, But watch with careful eye the passing train. Whose flambeau gilds the sashes of Pall-Mall, Yet I, (perhaps too fond,) if chance the tide When in long rank a train of torches flame, Tumultuous bear my partner from my side, To light the midnight visits of the dame ? Impatient venture back; despising hari,
Others, perhaps, by happier guidance led, I force my passage where the thickest swarm. May where the chairman rests with safety tread; Thus his lost bride the Trojan sought in vain | Whene'er I pass, their poles (unseen below) Through night, and arms, and flames, and hills of Make my knee tremble with a jarring blow. slain.
If wheels bar up the road, where streets are crost, Thus Nisus wander'd o'er the pathless grove, With gentle words the coachman's ear accost : To find the brave companion of his love.
He ne'er the threat or harsh command obeys, The pathless grove in vain he wanders o'er : But with contempt the spatter'd shoe surveys. Euryalus, alas! is now no more.
Now man with utmost fortitude thy soul, That walker who, regardless of his pace,
To cross the way where carts and coaches roll ; Turns oft to pore upon the damsel's face,
Yet do not in thy hardy skill confide,
Nor rashly risk the kennel's spacious stride ;
Thy foot will slide upon the miry stone,
And passing coaches crush thy tortur'd bonc, Where twirling turnstiles intercept the way, Or wheels enclose the road ; on either hand, The thwarting passenger shall force them round, Pent round with perils, in the midst you stand, And beat the wretch half breathless to the ground. And call for aid in vain; the coachman swears,
Let constant vigilance thy footsteps guide, And carmen drive, unmindful of thy prayers. And wary circumspection guard thy side; (night, Where wilt thou turn ? ah! whither wilt thou fly? Then shalt thou walk, unların'd, the dangerous On every side the pressing spokes are nigh. Nor need th' officious linkboy's smoky light. So sailors, while Charybdis' gulph they shun, Thou never wilt attempt to cross the road,
Amaz’d, on Scylla's craggy dangers run. Where ale-house benches rest the porter's load, Be sure observe where brown Ostrea stands, Grievous to heedless shins; no barrow's wheel, Who boasts her shelly ware from Wallfleet sands; That bruises oft the truant school-boy's heel, There may'st thou pass with safe unmiry feet, Behind thee rolling, with insidious pace,
Where the rais'd pavement leads athwart the street. Shall mark thy stocking with a miry trace.
If where Fleet-ditch with muddy current flows, Let not thy venturous steps approach too nigh, You chance to roam, where oyster-tubs in rows Where, gaping wide, low steepy cellars lie.
Are rang'd beside the posts; there stay thy haste, Should thy shoe wrench aside, down, down you fall, And with the savoury fish indulge thy taste : And overturn the scolding huckster's stall; The damsel's knife the gaping shell commands, The scolding huckster shall not o'er thee moan, While the salt liquor streams between her hands. But pence exact for nuts and pears o'erthrown. The man had sure a palate cover'd o'er
Though you through cleanlier alleys wind by day, | With brass or steel, that on the rocky shore
First broke the oozy oyster's pearly coat,
What will not Luxury taste ? Earth, sea, and air,
Where Lincoln's-inn, wide space, is rail'd around, And France robs marshes of the croaking brood ! Cross not with venturous step; there oft is found Spungy morels in strong ragouts are found, The lurking thief, who, while the day-light shone, And in the soup the slimy snail is drown'd. Made the walls echo with his begging tone:
When from high spouts the dashing torrents fall, That crutch, which late compassion mov'd, shall Ever be watchful to maintain the wall; (throng wound
For, should'st thou quit thy ground, the rushing Thy bleeding head, and fell thee to the ground. Will with impetuous fury drive along; Though thou art tempted by the link-man's call, All press to gain those honours thou hast lost, Yet trust him not along the lonely wall;
And rudely shove thee far without the post.
O think on Oedipus' detested state,
Where three roads join'd, he met his sire unNor Roman vengeance stabs th' unwary breast;
known; Here Tyranny ne'er lifts her purple hand,
(Unhappy sire, but more unhappy son!) But Liberty and Justice guard the land;
Each claim'd the way, their swords the strife decide, No bravos here profess the bloody trade,
The hoary monarch fell, he groan'd, and died ! Nor is the church the murderer's refuge made. Hence sprung the fatal plague that thinn'd thy Let not the chairman, with assuming stride,
reign, Press near the wall, and rudely thrust thy side: Thy cursed incest! and thy children slain ! The laws have set him bounds; his servile feet Hence wert thou doom'd in endless night to stray Should ne'er encroach where posts defend the street. Thro' Theban streets, and cheerless grope thy way. Contemplate, mortal, on thy fleeting years; | Thence thro' the street he reels from post to post, See, with black train the funeral pomp appears! Valiant with wine, nor knows his treasure lost. Whether some heir attends in sable state,
| The vagrant wretch th' assembled watchmen spies, And mourns, with outward grief, a parent's fate; He waves his hanger, and their poles defies; Or the fair virgin, nipt in beauty's bloom,
Deep in the round-house pent, all night he snores, A crowd of lovers follow to her tomb :
And the next morn in vain his fate deplores. Why is the hearse with 'scutcheons blazon'd round, Ah, hapless swain! unus'd to pains and ills! And with the nodding plume of ostrich crown'd ? Canst thou forego roast beef for nauseous pills ? No: the dead know it not, nor profit gain ; How wilt thou lift to Heaven thy eyes and hands, It only serves to prove the living vain.
When the long scroll the surgeon's fees demands ! How short is life! how frail is human trust! Or else (ye gods, avert that worst disgrace!) Is all this pomp for laying dust to dust?
Thy ruin'd nose falls level with thy face! Where the nail'd hoop defends the painted stall, Then shall thy wife thy loathsome kiss disdain, Brush not thy sweeping skirt too near the wall : And wholesome neighbours from thy mug refrain. Thy heedless sleeve will drink the colour'd oil, Yet there are watchmen, who with friendly light And spot indelible thy pocket soil.
Will teach thy reeling steps to tread aright; Has not wise Nature strung the legs and feet For sixpence will support thy helpless arm, With firmest nerves, design'd to walk the street ? And home conduct thee, safe from nightly harm. Has she not given us hands to grope aright, But, if they shake their lanterns, from afar Amidst the frequent dangers of the night?
To call their brethren to confederate war, And think'st thou not the double nostril meant, When rakes resist their power; if hapless you To warn from oily woes by previous scent?
Should chance to wander with the scouring crew; Who can the various city frauds * recite,
Though Fortune yield thee captive, ne'er despair, With all the petty rapines of the night?
But seek the constable's considerate ear; Who now the guinea-dropper's bait regards, He will reverse the watchman's harsh decree, Trick'd by the sharper's dice, or juggler's cards ? Mov'd by the rhetoric of a silver fee. [word, Why should I warn thee ne'er to join the fray, Thus, would you gain some favourite courtier's Where the sham quarrel interrupts the way? Fee not the petty clerks, but bribe any lord. Lives there in these our days so soft a clown,
Now is the time that rakes their revels keep; Brav'd by the bully's oaths, or threatening frown? Kindlers of riot, enemies of sleep. I need not strict enjoin the pocket's care,
His scatter'd pence the flying nicker * flings, When from the crowded play thou lead'st the fair; And with the copper shower the casement rings. Who has not here or watch or snuff-box lost, Who has not heard the scourer's midnight fame? Or handkerchiefs that India's shuttle boast ? Who has not trembled at the Mohock's name? 0! may thy virtue guard thee through the roads Was there a watchman took his hourly rounds, Of Drury's mazy courts, and dark abodes !
Safe from their blows, or new-invented wounds ? The harlots' guileful paths, who nightly stand I pass their desperate deeds, and mischiefs done, Where Catharine-street descends into the Strand! Where from Snow-hill black steepy torrents run; Say, vagrant Muse, their wiles and subtle arts, How matrons, hoop'd within the hogshead's womb, To lure the strangers' unsuspecting hearts : | Were tumbled furious thence; the rolling tomb So shall our youth on healthful sinews tread, O'er the stones thunders, bounds from side to side; And city cheeks grow warm with rural red. So Regulus, to save his country, dy'd.
'Tis she who nightly strolls with sauntering pace, Where a dim gleam the paly lantern throws No stubborn stays her yielding shape embrace ; | O'er the mid pavement, heapy rubbish grows; Beneath the lamp her tawdry ribbons glare,
Or arched vaults their gaping jaws extend, The new-scour'd manteau, and the slattern air ; Or the dark caves to common shores descend, High-draggled petticoats her travels show,
Oft by the winds extinct the signal lies, And hollow cheeks with artful blushes glow; Or smother'd in the glimmering socket dies, With flattering sounds she soothes the credulous ear, Ere Night has half roll'd round her ebon throne; “ My noble captain! charmer! love! my dear!" In the wide gulph the shatter'd coach, o'erthrown, In riding-hood near tavern-doors she plies, Sinks with the snorting steeds; the reins are broke, Or muffled pinners hide her livid eyes.
And from the crackling axle flies the spoke.
So, when tam'd Eddystone's far-shooting ray,
Fleets bulg'd their sides against the craggy land, Twitches thy sleeve, or with familiar airs
And pitchy ruins blackend all the strand. Her fan will pat thy cheek; these snares disdain, Who then through night would hire the harness' Nor gaze behind thee, when she turns again.
steed? I knew a yeoman, who, for thirst of gain, And who would choose the rattling wheel for speed? To the great city drove, from Devon's plain,
But hark! Distress, with screaming voice, draws His numerous lowing herd; his herds he sold,
nigher, And his deep leathern pocket bagg'd with gold. And wakes the slumbering street with cries of fire. Drawn by a fraudful nymph, he gaz'd, he sigh'd : At first a glowing red enwraps the skies, Unmindful of his home, and distant bride,
And, borne by winds, the scattering sparks arise; She leads the willing victim to his doom, Through winding alleys, to her cobweb room. • Gentlemen who delighted to break windows
with halfpence. • Various cheats formerly in practice.
From beam to beam the fierce contagion spreads ;
| SWEET WILLIAM'S FAREWELL TO Through the burst sash a blazing deluge pours,
The streamers waving in the wind,
“ Oh! where shall I my true-love find ? Boldly he climbs where thickest smoke ascends ; Tell me, ye jovial sailors, tell me true, Mov'd by the mother's streaming eyes and prayers, If my sweet William sails among the crew.” The helpless infant through the flame he bears, With no less virtue, than through hostile fire
William, who high upon the yard
Rock'd with the billow to and fro,
He sigh'd, and cast his eyes below :
And (quick as lightning) on the deck he stands. Blown by strong winds, the fiery tempest roars, Bears down new walls, and pours along the floors; So the sweet lark, high pois'd in air, The Heavens are all a-blaze, the face of Night
Shuts close his pinions to his breast, Is cover'd with a sanguine dreadful light.
(If chance his mate's shrill call he hear)
The noblest captain in the British fleet
My vows shall ever true remain ;
Let me kiss off that falling tear; With running blaze, awakes the barrel'd grain ;
We only part to meet again. Flames sudden wrap the walls; with sullen sound Change, as ve list, ye winds; my heart shall be The shatter'd pile sinks on the smoky ground. The faithful compass that still points to thee, So, when the years shall have revolv'd the date, Th' inevitable hour of Naples' fate,
“ Believe not what the landmen say Her sapp'd foundations shall with thunders shake, Who tempt with doubts thy constant mind. And heave and toss upon the sulphurous lake; They'll tell thee, sailors, when away, Earth's womb at once the fiery flood shall rend,
In every port a mistress find:
Consider, reader, what fatigues I've known, For thou art present wheresoe'er I go.
“ If to fair India's coast we sail, How oft I cross'd where carts and coaches roar;
Thy eyes are seen in diamonds bright; Yet shall I bless my labours, if mankind
Thy breath is Afric's spicy gale, Their future safety from my dangers find.
Thy skin is ivory so white. Thus the bold traveller (inur'd to toil,
Thus every beauteous object that I view, Whose steps have printed Asia's desert soil, Wakes in my soul some charm of lovely Sue. The barbarous Arabs' haunt; or shivering crost Dark Greenland's mountains of eternal frost; “ Though battle call me from thy arms, Whom Providence, in length of years, restores
Let not my pretty Susan mourn; To the wish'd harbour of his native shores)
Though cannons roar, yet, safe from harms, Sets forth his journals to the public view,
William shall to his dear return.
And now complete my generous labours lie, Lest precious tears should drop from Susan's eye."
The sails their swelling bosom spread;
They kiss'd, she sigh’d, he hung his head. When critics crazy bandboxes repair ;
Her lessening boat unwilling rows to land : And tragedies, turn'd rockets, bounce in air; “ Adieu !” she cries; and wav'd her lily hand. Higb rais'd on Fleet-street posts, consign'd to Fame, This work shall shine and walkers bless my name.
Wide o'er the foaming billows
She cast a wistful look; Her head was crown'd with willows,
That trembled o'er the brook.
“ Twelve months are gone and over,
And nine long tedious days; Why didst thou, venturous lover,
Why didst thou trust the seas?
And let my lover rest :
To that within my breast ?
“ The merchant, robb’d of pleasure,
Sees tempests in despair ;
To losing of my dear ?
Where gold and diamonds grow, You'd find a richer maiden,
But none that loves you so.
Rang'd cups, that in the window stood,
The Goat he welcomes with an air,
« I hope your custom, sir,” says Pug. “ Sure never face was half so smug!"
The Goat, impatient for applause, Swift to the neighbouring hill withdraws. The shaggy people grinn'd and star'd. “ Heigh-day! what's here? without a beard! Say, brother, whence the dire disgrace? What envious hand hath robb'd your face pus When thus the fop, with smiles of scorn, “ Are beards by civil nations worn ? Ev’n Muscovites have mow'd their chins. Shall we, like formal Capuchins, Stubborn in pride, retain the mode, And bear about the hairy load ? Whene'er we through the village stray, Are we not mock'd along the way, Insulted with loud shouts of scorn, By boys our beards disgrac'd and torn ?"
“ Were you no more with Goats to dwell, Brother, I grant you reason well,” Replies a bearded chief. “Beside, If boys can mortify thy pride, How wilt thou stand the ridicule Of our whole flock? Affected fool!"
Coxcombs, distinguish'd from the rest, To all but coxcombs are a jest.
“ How can they say that Nature
Has nothing made in vain ;
Should hideous rocks remain ?
That lurk beneath the deep, To wreck the wandering lover,
And leave the maid to weep."
All melancholy lying,
Thus wail'd she for her dear; Repay'd each blast with sighing,
Each billow with a tear; When o'er the white wave stooping,
His floating corpse she spy'd; Then, like a lily drooping,
She bow'd her head, and dy'd.
A Goat (as vain as Goat can be)
“ I hate my frowzy beard,” he cries,
Resolv’d to smooth his shaggy face,
As, twing'd with pain, he pensive sits,
“ My name, perhaps, hath reach'd your ear;
Thus said, the Phantom disappears.
But now again the Sprite ascends,