LXXVII SIR SIDNEY SMITH Gentlefolks, in my time, I've made many a rhyme, But the song I now trouble you with Lays some claim to applause, and you'll grant it, because The subject's Sir Sidney Smith, it is ; The subject's Sir Sidney Smith. We all know Sir Sidney, a man of such kidney, Give him one ship or two, and without more ado, Thus he took, every day, all that came in his way, Order'd accidents so, that, while taking the foe, Sir Sidney got taken himself. His captors, right glad of the prize they now had, Rejected each offer we bid, And swore he should stay, lock'd up till doomsday, But he swore he'd be hang'd if he did, he did; But he swore he'd be hang'd if he did. So Sir Sid got away, and his gaoler next day Mon prisonnier 'scape, I 'ave got in von scrape, T. Dibdin LXXVIII THE PIED PIPER OF HAMELIN Hamelin Town's in Brunswick, By famous Hanover city; The river Weser deep and wide A pleasanter spot you never spied; But, when begins my ditty, Almost five hundred years ago, To see the townsfolk suffer so Rats! They fought the dogs and killed the cats, And bit the babies in their cradles, And ate the cheeses out of the vats, And licked the soup from the cook's own ladles, Split open the kegs of salted sprats, Made nests inside men's Sunday hats, At last the people in a body To the Town-hall came flocking: Rouse up, Sirs! Give your brains a racking Or, sure as fate, we'll send you packing!' An hour they sat in council, At length the Mayor broke silence: It's easy to bid one rack one's brain- Just as he said this, what should hap Makes my heart go pit-a-pat! 'Come in!' the Mayor cried, looking bigger: His queer long coat from heel to head Starting up at the trump of Doom's tone, He advanced to the council table: And, 'Please your honours,' said he, 'I'm able, By means of a secret charm, to draw All creatures living beneath the sun, On creatures that do people harm, The mole, the toad, the newt, the viper ; Yet,' said he, 'poor piper as I am, In Tartary I freed the Cham, Last June, from his huge swarm of gnats; Of a monstrous brood of vampyre bats: Will you give me a thousand guilders?' Into the street the Piper stept, In his quiet pipe the while; To blow the pipe his lips he wrinkled, And green and blue his sharp eyes twinkled, Like a candle flame where salt is sprinkled ; And ere three shrill notes the pipe had uttered, You heard as if an army muttered; And the muttering grew to a grumbling; And the grumbling grew to a mighty rumbling; And out of the houses the rats came tumbling— Great rats, small rats, lean rats, brawny rats, |