Or the Life, Adventures, Amours, Intrigues, and Eccentricities of Gregory GRIFFIN.

THE life of many an adventurer might be summed up in a few words: for instance-" He was born of respectable parents, and educated with the greatest care and tenderness, but falling into bad company, his morals were corrupted-he abandoned himself to pleasure and dissipation-became gradually initiated into every species of profligacy-and ultimately terminated his career on the gallows." So laconic a memoir would not answer the purpose, where either amusement or instruction are intended. Much has been said in favour of the study of biography, and when Plutarch and Dr. Johnson have thought themselves laudably occupied in compiling the lives of heroes and poets, and Theophrastus and La Bruyere in drawing sketches of characters and manners, we shall need no apology for attempting a faithful relation of the adventures, amours, intrigues, and eccentricities of GreRam. Mag.-No. II.

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gory Griffin, although neither a hero nor a poet. If we are not mistaken, it is Dr. Johnson who says, that "there is no individual, however humble or obscure, whose life, if impartially written, would not afford much instruction."

Whatever, therefore, may be the merits or defects of the memoir about to be submitted to our readers, we entreat them to consider it as founded on fact, and comprising genuine sketches of life and character; in short, the result of actual experience, and not a fiction, founded on such ideas as are gathered only by the reading of novels and romances, and committed to paper by those who have had no opportunity of deriving practical knowledge.

It will be necessary, in many instances, to conceal both the names of places and persons, as the majority of the parties alluded to are still alive, and might be scandalized by the succeeding narrative.

Our hero was a natural child; he took the name of Griffin from his mother, and that of Gregory from his father, the Rev. Athanasius Gregory, D. D. who possessed a good living in the county of Sussex, and held a post of some consideration in Winchester Cathedral. This clergyman was an old bachelor, particularly addicted to good living, and had a very pleasant villa near St. Cross, on the road from Winchester to Southampton. His establishment consisted of a horse, a lad to look after it, an old woman who had been with him many years, and a poor girl or two from the workhouse to assist in the kitchen.

As this old woman was of great importance in the concerns of the reverend divine, we shall just mention the origin of their acquaintance. When Dr. Gregory was a young man, and pursuing his studies at Oxford, this said housekeeper was a fine buxom wench about twenty, in the habit of walking the streets of an evening, with a basin or a mug in one hand, and a key of a street-door in the other, to look like a clean wholesome servant girl, going of an errand, according to the general custom of the Cyprians at that seat of piety. and learning even unto this day. Young Gregory was

taken by the bait, and had frequent connection with her. In course of time he became so partial to her, that he took a house within three miles of the university, and fitted it up for her to let lodgings to the kept misses of the students, and for the convenience of private accouchements. Thither he resorted whenever he wished to relax from the rigid discipline of the schools, continuing to spend his leisure moments in fond dalliance with her during his stay at College, and on his quitting it, promised to pay her a visit once a year, at least. The pursuits of ambition and preferment, however, prevented his visiting her for several years, until he went to take up his degree of D. D. at the age of forty, when he found her still living in the neighbourhood, somewhat the worse for wear, and by no means in the comfortable circumstances he left her. She was then about forty-three, and had no charms to tempt a person of his years, but he had schemes in his head which induced him to think she might be of important service, and accordingly he proposed that she should go to Winchester, as his housekeeper. The poor woman was glad to accept that office; and, upon her arrival at St. Cross, the reverend and newly dubbed Doctor in Divinity addressed her in the following manner:-" Mrs. Jones, when you were young, you administered to my pleasure, and I paid you liberally for the use of your charms. We are both going down hill, but may still be serviceable to each other, though not in the same sense as formerly. You are well aware that persons advanced in life require the sight of youthful charms to stimulate them to the sports of love. My passion for women is as strong as ever, but my age requires additional excitements, and as I am blessed with all the other good things of this life, I see no reason why I should debar myself of that, without which, the world would be a wilderness. Your office, therefore, will be, to procure a succession of young girls as your servants, and gradually train them for my enjoyment. In return for these kind offices, you will be my confidential housekeeper as long as I live, and shall be well provided for if I die before you. More

over, should you have a colt's tooth still remaining in your head, or in other words, if you have yet any hankering after the flesh, I will turn away my old JOHN, who acts as groom and gardener, and you shall have the hiring of any stout athletic young man you may wish in his place. It will be in your power to nurse and pamper him in such a manner that he will not mind occasionally doing an odd job for a goodnatured woman, even though she is old enough to be his mother."

Mrs. Jones, who had during the latter period of her life acted as a procuress, felt no hesitation in accepting the office assigned her, and was pleased to obtain a comfortable and permanent asylum upon what, she (having no scruples of conscience) conceived, very easy terms. She immediately applied to the parish workhouse for a couple of girls, about 13 or 14 years of age, to assist in her kitchen, in order that she might commence her vocation. As the seduction, of which Gregory Griffin was the offspring, did not happen until ten years after this period, we shall pass over the catalogue of innocents that were corrupted by this experienced couple, nor disgust our readers by the various plans of iniquity they pursued to entrap them, but come at once to the case of Maria Griffin, the mother of our hero. She was an orphan, in the parish work-house, and answered the description generally applied for by Dr. Gregory's housekeeper. When she was taken into service she was nearly fifteen; her hair was light, complexion fair, and disposition mild and docile. The parish dress consisted of a coarse dowlas smock, linseyWoolsey petticoat, leather stays, green stuff gown, worsted stockings, and heavy nailed shoes. In this garb she continued to assist in the Doctor's kitchen about three months, when she was told she would shortly have some new and better cloaths given to her, as her conduct was approved of. It is only those who have been in such situations themselves, that can conceive the joy excited in her bosom by this information. Her thoughts were occupied day and night with the subject, and her work was rapidly dispatched that she

might have the more leisure to assist the housekeeper in making the new apparel. She was also promised that when her cloaths were ready, she would be promoted to wait at table; and was told, if she pleased her master, he would be kind to her, and make her many presents. One evening, after her new suit was finished, she was ordered to wash herself, and come into the parlour, where the housekeeper introduced her to the Doctor, in these words-" If you please, sir, I wish you to see one of my little maids; she has been with me three months, and conducted herself so well, that I am about to reward her with some new cloaths to wear on a Sunday."

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Aye, aye, by all means, Mrs. Jones; I am sure she deserves them, if she is as good as she is pretty. Fetch them here, and put them on, that I may judge how they become her." This was part of the scheme of these Devils incarnate. They thought that a girl so young, and so simple, would put up with any treatment for the sake of new cloaths. The poor creature blushed and trembled. She begged Mrs. Jones to let her go into another room. "Poo, poo, child," said Mrs. Jones, why should you mind undressing, am not I here to dress you. Are not your master and myself old enough to be your parents. You shall not have the cloaths, but he bundled back to the workhouse if you give yourself these airs; therefore strip yourself immediately, and put on this fine new shift which I have made for you." The poor girl hung down her head and commenced, but was so slow, that Mrs. Jones brought her before the fire, to strip the girl herself, and just as she had left her completely bare" There, sir," said she to the lecherous old parson-"What reason had this girl to be ashamed of stripping before a gentleman-she is neither diseased nor deformed, but on the contrary, has as fine and soft a skin as you would wish to seeher shape is exquisite, her bosom nearly ripe, and every thing else in perfection." Poor Maria burst into tears. "What's the fool whimpering about? There! if I was you, sir, as you are the giver of these things, I'd make her sit on my knee, and have the pleasure of