FRAGMENT IV. How vain are all the efforts of human reason, when put in competition with the impetuous flood of despair; like a barrier incessantly washed by the torrent, it resists for a time only to fall with more vehemence beneath the overwhelming tide.I see her; I am for ever in her presence; I live in the beam of her eye; I bask in the sunshine of her beauty-yes; I am for ever in the presence of my adored queen, my august and lovely sovereign.-Oh Gordon! my throbbing heart, my woe-worn countenance, beholds thee with unutterable anguish; thy rank, thy wealth, but more than all, thy form and Mary's affection give thee a claim which the unhappy Chatelar can never aspire to. But, what are claims? they have no tie upon love; they cannot nip the blossoms of the heart, nor blight its fond pretensions: Chatelar may therefore love, though he is denied e'en hope.-Is it, then, one dreary blank; am I henceforth to look on life but as one dreary waste, a trackless desert; and is all before me withered and accursed?-My brain cannot withstand the horrid contemplation; my blood feels the quick revulsion, and rushes with tenfold more precipitancy to my heart; and yet, my languishing but sickened fancy struggles to present once more in thought the beauty and enchantment of my lovely queen. -Ah! what a glance, what a stolen but rapturous gaze I this day bent upon her features !Yes, I devoured in speechless amazement the soul-subduing charms; I pant but to enjoy, and then expire with rapture.-Her chamber-yes; I passed it; I caught the blissful moment when, absorbed in meditation, she thought herself alone Ah! that chamber! Where is the rash being who would venture to seek repose within that sanctuary of love and beauty? I would tear him from existence !-yes, I could refine on savage cruelty; the monster should be blotted from the race of men; for who can dare contend with me the rivalship of a scene too mighty even for my glowing senses? * * * * This rosary was the theft of love, surely 'tis forgiven; I stole the secret moment, and in the absence of my love I made myself possessor of these beads unseen.— Heavenly powers! they were Mary's; her ivory 1 fingers, with love-thrilling touch, have pressed these little amber studs; her lips! love, love, omniscient love! her lips too have kissed them! Come, come to mine-thus-and thus ;-and thus I scent their fragrance, and I suck their sweets! -Oh, balmy essence! nectareous juice! ting'd with the vermil die of those moist rubies, which moving utter dulcet music, and dispense around the violet's rich perfume.-O! mouth more exquisite than fragrant May! more luscious than the busy bee's rich store! thus, then, I taste thee; for nought that thou hast pressed can ever be bereft of sweets. Mary too has knelt, while pressing this rosary to her lips-sink, then, my obedient knees, and learn, O Chatelar! to offer up thy orison. But, ah! to what a summit must I rear my humid eyes, ere I can obtain one faint ray of light that may illumine my prayers, and render them as acceptable as Mary's at the Throne of Grace; still will I pray; these beads will surely give me inspiration; for they were an angel's, and mercy is the first, the greatest attribute of Heaven. |