I have no more doublets than backs, no more stock-And not a tinker, nor Christophero Sly.— ings than legs, nor no more shoes than feet; nay, Well, bring our lady hither to our sight; sometimes, more feet than shoes, or such shoes as And once again, a pot o' the smallest ale. tny toes look through the overleather. 2 Serv. Will't please your mightiness to wash your hands?

Lord. Heaven cease this idle humour in your

honour!

O, that a mighty man, of such descent,
Of such possessions, and so high esteem,
Should be infused with so foul a spirit!

[Servants present an ewer, bason, and napkin.
O, how we joy to see your wit restor❜d!
O, that once more you knew but what you are!
These fifteen years you have been in a dream;
Or, when you wak'd, so wak'd as if you slept.
Sly. These fifteen years! by my fay, a goodly

nap.

Sly. What, would you make me mad? Am not I Christopher Sly, old Sly's son of Burton-heath; by birth a pedler, by education a card-maker, by transmutation a bear-herd, and now by present But did I never speak of all that time? profession a tinker? Ask Marian Hacket, the fat ale wife of Wincot, if she know me not: if she say I am not fourteen pence on the score for sheer ale, score me up for the lyingest knave in Christendom. What, I am not bestraught: Here's

I Serv. O, this it is that makes your lady mourn. 2 Serv. Ó, this it is that makes your servants droop.

Lord. Hence comes it that your kindred shun
your house,

As beaten hence by your strange lunacy.
O, noble lord, bethink thee of thy birth;
Call home thy ancient thoughts from banishment,
And banish hence these abject lowly dreams :
Look how thy servants do attend on thee,
Each in his office ready at thy beck.
Wilt thou have music? hark! Apollo plays,

[Music.

And twenty caged nightingales do sing:
Or wilt thou sleep? we'll have thee to a couch,
Softer and sweeter than the lustful bed
On purpose trimm'd up for Semiramis.
Say, thou wilt walk; we will bestrew the ground:
Or wilt thou ride? thy horses shall be trapp'd,
Their harness studded all with gold and pearl.
Dost thou love hawking? thou hast hawks will soar
Above the morning lark: Or wilt thou hunt?
Thy hounds shall make the welkin answer them,
And fetch shrill echoes from the hollow earth.

1 Serv. Say, thou wilt course; thy greyhounds
are as swift

As breathed stags, ay, fleeter than the roe.
2 Serv. Dost thou love pictures? we will fetch
thee straight

Adonis, painted by a running brook:
And Cytherea all in sedges hid;

Which seem to move and wanton with her breath,
Even as the waving sedges play with wind.

Lord. We'll show thee Io, as she was a maid;
And how she was beguiled and surpris'd,
As lively painted as the deed was done.

3 Serv. Or Daphne, roaming through a thorny
wood;

Scratching her legs that one shall swear she bleeds:
And at that sight shall sad Apollo weep,
So workmanly the blood and tears are drawn.
Lord. Thou art a lord, and nothing but a lord:
Thou hast a lady far more beautiful
Than any woman in this waning age.

1 Serv. And, till the tears that she hath shed for
thee,

Like envious floods, o'er-ran her lovely face,
She was the fairest creature in the world;
And yet she is inferior to none.

Sly. Am I a lord? and have I such a lady?
Or do I dream? or have I dream'd till now?
I do not sleep: I see, I hear, I speak;

:

I smell sweet savours, and I feel soft things:-
Upon my life, I am a lord, indeed;

1 Serv. O, yes, my lord; but very idle words:-
For though you lay here in this goodly chamber,
Yet would you say, ye were beaten out of door;
And rail upon the hostess of the house;
And say, you would present her at the leet,'
Because she brought stone jugs and no seal'd quarts
Sometimes you would call out for Cicely Hacket.
Sly. Ay, the woman's maid of the house.

3 Serv. Why, sir, you know no house, nor no
such maid;

Nor no such men, as you have reckon'd up,-
As Stephen Sly, and old John Naps of Greece,
And Peter Turf, and Henry Pimpernell;
And twenty more such names and men as these,
Which never were, nor no man ever saw.

Sly. Now, Lord be thanked for my good amends!
All. Amen.

Sly. I thank thee; thou shalt not lose by it.
Enter the Page, as a lady, with attendants.
Page. How fares my noble lord?

Sly. Marry, I fare well; for here is cheer enough.
Where is my wife?

Page. Here, noble lord; What is thy will with her?
Sly. Are you my wife, and will not call me-
husband?

My men should call me-lord; I am your goodman.
Page. My husband and my lord, my lord and

I

husband;

am your wife in all obedience.

Sly. I know it well:-What must I call her?
Lord. Madam.

Sly.
Al'ce madam, or Joan madam?
Lord. Madam, and nothing else; so lords call

ladies.

Sly. Madam wife, they say that I have dream'd, and slept

Above some fifteen year and more.

Page. Ay, and the time seems thirty unto me:
Being all this time abandon'd from your bed.
Sly. 'Tis much;--Servants, leave me and he
alone.-

Madam, undress you, and come now to bed.

Page. Thrice noble lord, let me entreat of you,
To pardon me yet for a night or two;
Or, if not so, until the sun be set:
For your physicians have expressly charg'd,
In peril to incur your former malady,
That I should yet absent me from your bed:
I hope, this reason stands for my excuse.

Sly. Ay, it stands so, that I may hardly tarry so long. But I would be loath to fall into my dreams again; I will therefore tarry, in despite of the flesh and the blood.

Enter a Servant,

Serv. Your honour's players, hearing your amendment,

Are come to play a pleasant comedy,

For so your doctors hold it very meet;

(3) Court-leet. Seeing too much sadness hath congeal'd your blood,

But, if it were, doubt not her care should be To comb your noddle with a three-legg'd stool, Enter And paint your face, and use you like a fool.

I bear my sweet Bianca, if I can by any means light on a fit man, to teach her that wherein she delights, I will wish him to her father.

I

Tra. Nay, then, 'tis time to stir him from hie

trance.

stands:

pray, awake, sir; If you love the maid, Hor. So will I, signior Gremio: But a word, I Bend thoughts and wits to achieve her. Thus it pray. Though the nature of our quarrel yet never brook'a parle, know now, upon advice,' it toucheth Her elder sister is so curst and shrewd, us both,-that we may yet again have access to our fair mistress, and be happy rivals in Bianca's love, -to labour and effect one thing 'specially. Gre. What's that, I pray?

Hor. Marry, sir, to get a husband for her sister.
Gre. A husband! a devil.
Hor. I say, a husband.

Gre. I say, a devil: Think'st thou, Hortensio, though her father be very rich, any man is so very a fool to be married to hell?

Hor. Tush, Gremio, though it pass your patience, and mine, to endure her loud alarums, why, man, there be good fellows in the world, an a man could light on them, would take her with all faults, and money enough.

Gre. I cannot tell; but I had as lief take her dowry with this condition,-to be whipped at the high-cross every morning.

That, till the father rid his hands of her,
Master, your love must live a maid at home;
And therefore has he closely mew'd her up,
Because she shall not be annoy'd with suitors.

Luc. Ah, Tranio, what a cruel father's he!
But art thou not advis'd, he took some care
To get her cunning schoolmasters to instruct her?
Tra. Ay marry, am I, sir; and now 'tis plotted.
Luc. I have it, Tranio.

Tra.

Master, for my hand,
Both our inventions meet and jump in one.
Luc. Tell me thine first.
Tra.

You will be schoolmaster And undertake the teaching of the maid: That's your device. Luc. It is May it be done? Tra. Not possible; for who shall bear your part, And be in Padua here Vincentio's son? Hor. 'Faith, as you say, there's small choice in Keep house, and ply his book; welcome his friends; rotten apples. But, come; since this bar in law Visit his countrymen, and banquet them? makes us friends, it shall be so far forth friendly Luc. Basta; content thee; for I have it full. maintained, till by helping Baptista's eldest We have not yet been seen in any house; daughter to a husband, we set his youngest free for Nor can we be distinguished by our faces, a husband, and then have to't afresh.-Sweet Bi- For man, or master: then it follows thus ;anca!-Happy man be his dole! He that runs fast-Thou shalt be master, Tranio, in my stead, est, gets the ring. How say you, signior Gremio? Keep house, and port, and servants, as I should Gre. I am agreed: and 'would I had given him I will some other be; some Florentine, the best horse in Padua to begin his wooing, that Some Neapolitan, or mean man of Pisa. would thoroughly woo her, wed her, and bed her, and rid the house of her. Come on. [Exeunt Gremio and Hortensio. Tra. [Advancing.] I pray, sir, tell me,-Is it possible

That love should of a sudden take such hold?
Luc. O Tranio, till I found it to be true,

I never thought it possible, or likely;
But see! while idly I stood looking on,
I found the effect of love in idleness:
And now in plainness do confess to thee,-
That art to me as secret, and as dear,
As Anna to the queen of Carthage was,-
Tranio, I burn, I pine I perish, Tranio,
If I achieve not this young modest girl:
Counsel me, Tranio, for I know thou canst;
Assist me, Tranio, for I know thou wilt.

Tra. Master, it is no time to chide you now;
Affection is not rated3 from the heart:
If love have touch'd you, nought remains but so,-
Redime et captum quam queas minimo.

Luc. Gramercies, lad; go forward: this contents;
The rest will comfort, for thy counsel's sound.
Tra. Master, you look'd so longly on the maid,
Perhaps you mark'd not what's the pith of all.
Luc. O yes, I saw sweet beauty in her face,
Such as the daughters of Agenor had,
That made great Jove to humble him to her hand,
When with his knees he kiss'd the Cretan strand.
Tra. Saw you no more? mark'd you not, how
her sister

Began to scold; and raise up such a storm,
That mortal ears might hardly endure the din?
Luc. Tranio, I saw her coral lips to move,
And with her breath she did perfume the air;
Sacred, and sweet, was all I saw in her.

(1) Consideration. (2) Gain or lot.
(2) Driven out by chiding. (4) Longingly.
(5) Europa. (6) 'Tis enough.

'Tis hatch'd, and shall be so :-Tranio, at once
Uncase thee; take my colour'd hat and cloak:
When Biondello comes, he waits on thee;
But I will charm him first to keep his tongue.

Tra. So had you need. [They exchange habits.
In brief then, sir, sith it your pleasure is,
And I am tied to be obedient

(For so your father charg'd me at our parting;
Be serviceable to my son, quoth he,
Although, I think, 'twas in another sense ;)
I am content to be Lucentio,

Because so well I love Lucentio.

Luc. Tranio, be so, because Lucentio loves: And let me be a slave, to achieve that maid, Whose sudden sight hath thrall'd my wounded eye.

Enter Biondello.

Here comes the rogue.-Sirrah, where have you been?

Bion. Where have I been? Nay, how now, where
are you?

Master, has my fellow Tranio stol'n your clothes?
Or you stol'n his? or both? pray, what's the news?

Luc. Sirrah, come hither; 'tis no time to jest,
And therefore frame your manners to the time.
Your fellow Tranio here, to save my life,
Puts my apparel and my countenance on,
And I for my escape have put on his;
For in a quarrel, since I came ashore,
I kill'd a man, and fear I was descried:
Wait you on him, I charge you, as becomes,
While I make way from hence to save my life.
You understand me?
Bion.
I, sir? ne'er a whit.
Luc. And not a jot of Tranio in your mouth;
Tranio is chang'd into Lucentio.

Bion. The better for him; 'Would I were so too

Tra. So would I, 'faith, boy, to have the next Rap me here, knock me well, and knock me wish after,

soundly?

That Lucentio indeed had Baptista's youngest | And come you now with-knocking at the gate? daughter.

But, sirrah,-not for my sake, but your master's,-
I advise

You use your manners discreetly in all kind of
companies:

When I am alone, why, then I am Tranio;
But in all places else, your master Lucentío.
Luc. Tranio, let's go:-

One thing more rests, that thyself execute ;-
To make one among these wooers: If thou ask me
why,-

Sufficeth, my reasons are both good and weighty.
[Exeunt.
1 Serv. My lord, you nod: you do not mind the
play.

Sly. Yes, by saint Anne, do I. A good matter, surely; Comes there any more of it?

Page. My lord, 'tis but begun.

Sly. 'Tis a very excellent piece of work, madam lady; 'Would't were done!

SCENE II.-The same. Before Hortensio's

house. Enter Petruchio and Grumio.

Pet. Verona, for a while I take my leave,
To see my friends in Padua ; but of all,
My best beloved and approved friend,
Hortensio; and, I trow, this is his house:
Here, sirrah Grumio; knock, I say.

Gru. Knock, sir! whom should I knock? is there any man has rebused your worship?

Pet. Villain, I say, knock me here soundly. Gru. Knock you here, sir? why, sir, what am sir, that I should knock you here, sir?

I,

Pet. Villain, I say, knock me at this gate,
And rap me well, or I'll knock your knave's pate.
Gru. My master is grown quarrelsome: I should
knock you first,

And then I know after who comes by the worst.
Pet. Will it not be?
'Faith, sirrah, and you'll not knock, I'll wring it;
I'll try how you can sol, fa, and sing it.

[He wrings Grumio by the ears. Gru. Help, masters, help! my master is mad. Pet. Now, knock when I bid you: sirrah! villain!

Enter Hortensio.

Hor. How now? what's the matter?-My old friend Grumio! and my good friend Petruchio! How do you all at Verona ?

Pet. Signior Hortensio, come you to part the fray?
Con tutto il core bene trovato, may I say.
Hor. Alla nostra casa bene venuto,

Molto honorato signior mio Petruchio.

Rise, Grumio, rise; we will compound this quarrel.

Pet. Sirrah, be gone, or talk not, I advise you. Hor. Petruchio, patience; I am Grumio's pledge: Why, this is a heavy chance 'twixt him and you; Your ancient, trusty, pleasant servant Grumio. And tell me now, sweet friend,-what happy gale Blows you to Padua here, from old Verona ?

Pet. Such wind as scatters young men through
the world,

To seek their fortunes further than at home,
Where small experience grows. But in a few,2
Signior Hortensio, thus it stands with me:-
Antonio, my father, is deceas'd;

And I have thrust myself into this maze,
Haply to wive, and thrive, as best I may :
Crowns in my purse I have, and goods at home,
And so am come abroad to see the world.

Hor. Petruchio, shall I then come roundly to
thee,

And wish thee to a shrewd ill-favour'd wife?
Thou'dst thank me but a little for my counsel:
And yet I'll promise thee she shall be rich,
And very rich:-but thou'rt too much my friend,
And I'll not wish thee to her.

Pet. Signior Hortensio, 'twixt such friends as we,
Few words suffice: and, therefore, if thou know
One rich enough to be Petruchio's wife,
(As wealth is burthen of my wooing dance,}
Be she as foul as was Florentius' love,'
As old as Sybil, and as curst and shrewd
As Socrates' Xantippe, or a worse,
She moves me not, or not removes, at least,
Affection's edge in me; were she as rough.
As are the swelling Adriatic seas:
If wealthily, then happily in Padua.
come to wive it wealthily in Padua ;

or an

Gru. Nay, look you, sir, he tells you flatly what
his mind is: Why, give him gold enough, and
marry him to a puppet, or an aglet-baby
old trot with ne'er a tooth in her head, though she
have as many diseases as two and fifty horses: why,
nothing comes amiss, so money comes withal.

Hor. Petruchio, since we have stepp'd thus far in,
I will continue that I broach'd in jest.
I can, Petruchio, help thee to a wife
With wealth enough, and young, and beauteous;
Brought up, as best becomes a gentlewoman:
Her only fault (and that is faults enough,)
Is,-that she is intolerably curst,

And shrewd, and froward; so beyond all measure,
That, were my state far worser than it is,

I would not wed her for a mine of gold.
Pet. Hortensio, peace; thou know'st not gold's
effect:-

Gru. Nay, 'tis no matter, what he 'leges' in Latin Tell me her father's name, and 'tis enough; -if this be not a lawful cause for me to leave his For I will board her, though she chide as loud service,-Look you, sir,—he bid me knock him, and As thunder, when the clouds in autumn crack. rap him soundly, sir: Well, was it fit for a servant to use his master so; being, perhaps, (for aught see,) two and thirty,-a pip out? Whom, 'would to God, I had well knock'd at first, Then had not Grumio come by the worst.

I

Pet. A senseless villain!-Good Hortensio,
I bade the rascal knock upon your gate,
And could not get him for my heart to do it.
Gru. Knock at the gate ?-O heavens!
Spake you not these words plain,-Sirrah, knock

me here,

(1) Alleges.

(2) Few words.

(3) See the story, No. 39, of ' A Thousand Notable Things.'

Hor. Her father is Baptista Minola,
An affable and courteous gentleman:
Her name is Katharina Minola,..
Renown'd in Padua for her scolding tongue.

Pet. I know her father, though I know not her,
And he knew my deceased father well:-
I will not sleep, Hortensio, till I see her;
And therefore let me be thus bold with you,
To give you over at this first encounter,
Unless you will accompany me thither.

Gru. I pray you, sir, let him go while the hu→ mour lasts. O''my word, an she knew him as well as I do, she would think scolding would do little

(4) A small image on the tag of lace.

good upon him: She may, perhaps, call him half So shall I no whit be behind in duty
a score knaves, or so: why, that's nothing; an he To fair Bianca, so belov'd of me.
begin once, he'll rail in his rope-tricks. I'll tell
you what, sir,-an she stand him but a little, he
will throw a figure in her face, and so disfigure her
with it, that she shall have no more eyes to see
withal than a cat: you know him not, sir.

Gre. Belov'd of me,-and that my deeds shall

Hor. Tarry, Petruchio, I must go with thee;
For in Baptista's keep my treasure is:
He hath the jewel of my life in hold,
His youngest daughter, beautiful Bianca;
And her withholds from me, and other more
Suitors to her, and rivals in my love:
Supposing it a thing impossible
(For those defects I have before rehears'd,)
That ever Katharina will be woo'd,
Therefore this order4 hath Baptista ta'en;-
That none shall have access unto Bianca,
Till Katharine the curst have got a husband.
Gru. Katharine the curst!

A title for a maid, of all titles the worst.
Hor. Now shall my friend Petruchio do me grace;
And offer me, disguis'd in sober robes,
To old Baptista as a schoolmaster
Well seen in music, to instruct Bianca:
That so I may by this device, at least,
Have leave and leisure to make love to her,
And, unsuspected, court her by herself.

Enter Gremio; with him Lucentio disguised, with

books under his arm.

prove.

Gru. And that his bags shall prove.

[Aside.

Hor. Gremio, 'tis now no time to vent our love
Listen to me, and if you speak me fair,
I'll tell you news indifferent good for either.
Here is a gentleman, wnom by chance I met,
Upon agreement from us to his liking,
Will undertake to woo curst Katharine;
Yea, and to marry her, if her dowry please.
Gre. So said, so done, is well :-
Hortensio, have you told him all her faults?
Pet. I know, she is an irksome brawling scold,
If that be all, masters, I hear no harm.
Gre. No, say'st me so, friend? What country
man?

Pet. Born in Verona, old Antonio's son:
My father dead, my fortune lives for me;
And I do hope good days, and long, to see.

Gre. O, sir, such a life, with such a wife, were
strange:

But, if you have a stomach, to't, o' God's name;
You shall have me assisting you in all.
But will you woo this wild cat?
Pet.
Will I live?
Gru. Will he woo her? a, or I'll hang her.

[Aside. Pet. Why came I hither, but to that intent? Think you, a little din can daunt mine ears? Gru. Here's no knavery! See; to beguile the Have I not in my time heard lions roar? old folks, how the young folks lay their heads to- Have I not heard the sea, puff'd up with winds, gether! Master, master, look about you: Who Rage like an angry boar, chafed with sweat? goes there? ha! Have I not heard great ordnance in the field,

Hor. Peace, Grumio; 'tis the rival of my love:- And heaven's artillery thunder in the skies?'
Petruchio, stand by a while.
Have I not in a pitched battle heard

Gru. A proper stripling, and an amorous!
[They retire.
Gre. O, very well; I have perus'd the note.
Hark you, sir; I'll have them very fairly bound:
All books of love, see that at any hand;
And see you read no other lectures to her :
You understand me:-Over and beside
Signior Baptista's liberality,

Loud 'larums, neighing steeds, and trumpets'clang.
And do you tell me of a woman's tongue;
That gives not half so great a blow to the ear,
As will a chesnut in a farmer's fire?
Tush! tush! fear boys with bugs.
Gru.

Gre. Hortensio, hark!

For he fears none.
Aside.

I'll mend it with a largess :-Take your papers too, This gentleman is happily arriv'd,

And let me have them very well perfum'd;
For she is sweeter than perfume itself,

To whom they go. What will you read to her?
Luc. Whate'er I read to her, I'll plead for you,
As for my patron (stand you so assur'd,)
As firmly as yourself were still in place:
Yea, and (perhaps) with more successful words
Than you, unless you were a scholar, sir.

Gre. O this learning! what a thing it is!
Gru. O this woodcock! what an ass it is!
Pet. Peace, sirrah.

Hor. Grumio, mum!-God save you, signior
Gremio!

Gre. And you're well met, signior Hortensio.

Trow you,

Whither I am going ?-To Baptista Minola.

I promis'd to inquire carefully

About a schoolmaster for fair Bianca:

And, by good fortune, I have lighted well

On this young man; for learning, and behaviour,
Fit for her turn; well read in poetry,
And other books,-good ones, I warrant you.
Hor. 'Tis well: and I have met a gentleman,
Hath promis'd me to help me to another,
A fine musician to instruct our mistress;

My mind presumes, for his own good, and yours.
Hor. I promis'd, we would be contributors,
And bear his charge of wooing, whatsoe'er.
Gre. And so we will; provided, that he win her.
Gru. I would, I were as sure of a good dinner.

[Aside.

Enter Tranio, bravely apparelled; and Biondello.
Tra. Gentlemen, God save you! IfI may be bold,
Tell me, I beseech you, which is the readiest way
To the house of signior Baptista Minola?

Gre. He that has the two fair daughters :-is't [Aside to Tranio.] he you mean?

Tra. Even he. Biondello!

Gre. Hark you, sir; You mean not her to--
Tra. Perhaps, him and her, sir; What have

you to do?

Pet. Not her that chides, sir, at any hand, I pray
Tra. I love no chiders, sir:-Biondello, let's

Tra. An if I be, sir, is it any offence?

(5) Versed. (6) Rate.

(7) Present.

(8) Fright boys with bug-bears.